Amy and Tamara Inspire Again

I have been experiencing this and trying to express it since the surgery on June 15. Still clumping around in the boot and hoping this cheers those of you who are struggling.

August 15 Amy Carmichael from Edges of His Ways
For the tempted. (1)
Psalm 77:3, P.B.V.: When I am in heaviness, I will think upon God.
“Have you noticed how, when you are in heaviness, you are always tempted to think about yourself–your uselessness, your failures, your nothingness–yourself in one way or another? I have known this temptation and have constantly found it tormenting others. To draw one’s thoughts to oneself is a long-tried and most successful wile of the devil.

“Straight against this is the word we have in this psalm, “When I am in heaviness, I will think upon God.” I will turn my thoughts from myself to my Father who loves me and does not stop loving me, though I am useless and a failure and less than nothing at all.”

The meditation app Calm on the same day brought forth the idea of how we fixate on certain things as required for our contentment. We are ever reaching for one thing or the other than what is for our happiness and contentment. Both Amy Carmichael and Tamara Levitt encourage us to find peace right where we are. Right now. With things as they are.

Tamara says, “The stories we tell ourselves about our lives suggest there is always something missing, some incomplete piece keeping us from happiness.” She reminds us that it is “unhealthy to place our happiness on some ever-elusive external goal.” She challenges us to find satisfaction with who we are right now. Amy stated we might feel “useless and a failure and less than nothing.” Tamra suggests we turn loose of the idea of something missing and cling instead to what is here, right now, as enough.

Tamara says, “When we rely on external factors as the key to happiness we only perpetuate our discontentment. She quote B. Grace Bullock as saying, “Once you shed your distorted lens and self-doubting beliefs, there’s a good chance you’ll discover that you’re pretty awesome. And that the light burning within you is a far more accurate reflection of who you are than the stories you have been telling yourself.” That is when contentment becomes possible.

Shed your distorted lens

So my struggle the last couple of months has been to stay in the present, realize that even with physical limitations I can turn my heart and mind towards God. If I stop telling myself distorted stories and think upon my God, contentment is possible. Just now.

As I am.

Right here.

Give it try!

Your Tomorrow ….

Starts tonight …NOOOOOO. We have a news channel that says this every day about their broadcast. I suppose they are saying they want us to be prepared, but it is not a good saying to me. “Your tomorrow starts tonight.” We do not even stay up late enough to hear their broadcast.

Guess that news channel never heard that one days trouble is enough for that day.

So do not worry about tomorrow; for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own. Matthew 6:34 AMP

Wise up TV slogan writers!

The Power of Maybe

Can you. Stop for a moment. View your situation through the lens of maybe? Maybe this is for the good. Perhaps this is going some place you had not imagined. Maybe you do not have all the facts. Could be you only understand in part?

Stop. Pause. Breathe.

Maybe is a powerful word. May – I am able. I am free to do.

Maybe shows uncertainty and also possibility.

Too often our minds decide a situation and close upon one conclusion like a steel trap.

There are many places we make major decisions in life and also the myriad decisions we make every day. Places where we can and ought to insert the word maybe.

It may be that I have misinterpreted something. This sort of thought dethrones the ego who wants to be God and by doing so invites the wisdom of the Holy Spirit to open the eyes of our heart to new insights, possibilities we might not have thought about.

Maybe this will give you food for thought. May Be.

Limitations Can be Fun?

Everything, even the hard things, are wrapped up in the loving kindnesses of the Lord, and His loving-kindnesses “have been ever of old.” Psalm 25:6 I have searched, but I cannot find the place Amy Carmichael is quoting from with this passage about even the hard things.

I have been trying to sing “Li-mi-ta-tions can be fun,” but through the sarcasm I try to realize the truth of the matter.

Amy quoted Isaiah 63:7: I will mention the loving kindnesses of the Lord, and the praises of the Lord, according to all that the Lord hath bestowed on us, and the great goodness toward the house of Israel, which He hath bestowed on them according to His mercies, and according to the multitude of His loving kindnesses. Douay-Rheims 1898

I am truly sick and tired of the limitations after foot surgery. Then Bob and I both caught a VERY NASTY cold. What a mess. Doc said it is not covid or the flu. Likely a virus. I wondered about covid as I coughed so hard I feel as if I tore all of my abdominal muscles. You know it is bad when you wonder if it might be less painful to cough with a corset on? So yep, holding my belly and trying not to cough though coughing has been productive and gunk is clearing out of my sinuses and throat. Doc said 7-10 days until I feel better.

“Everything, even the hard things are wrapped up in love.” I have been searching for the love wrappings here. At times that wrapping is difficult to discern! Over a year ago my granddaughter gave me a bunch of crocheted squares that she grew tired of. She thought perhaps I could join them into a blanket, “or something.” They were placed in an area with other unfinished crochet projects. With this arthritic right thumb I have to be careful how much I actually crochet or I aggravate the joint into throbbing pain. When I grew tired of making hats for children I began putting an edge on the squares and noticed right away the increase in thumb pain. So I did just a bit a day. Soon I had the squares joined and began to plan how to increase the overall size.

I had purchased similar yarn to join the squares. I even have a deep turquoise but uncertain I will use it. I did not try to match the yarn she used. Besides, she had thrown away the wrappers, so I could have searched for a long time and would likely never find it.

Here I am seven weeks into this recovery. It has been difficult to pass the time without losing my cotton pickin’ mind. There is some what of a routine, but I would gladly toss that routine out the window for the ability to function without foot pain and swelling; from 4:00 PM on is the worst.

There are times I wonder if doc implanted a chameleon foot in place of my other one? It can turn the most awful shade of purple if I leave it hanging down for too long.

The other day I was remembering how I used to be able to pick things up with my toes. Those days are gone at least for the left foot! Looking for chameleon photos just now I wondered if this new toe could fetch me snacks like this chameleon is about to enjoy?

Love those little front paws/hands!

Nope, I have not learned origami though I started one piece. When the pattern got difficult I realized I was losing my patience and put it aside.

I have been able to do more things around the house than those first few weeks. Bob tells people he used to have to do 200 things for me everyday. Now he is down to about 40? Sometimes if I ask him to do something he will tease me saying, “45!” Such a clown. My strength and endurance is increasing.

Several friends have come from time to time to work on my list of things to do that I cannot do. They have been such a blessing to us both! Their help reduces the things I require from Bob. Lord knows, he has been doing PLENTY!

I will recount the gracious deeds of the Lord,
    the praiseworthy acts of the Lord,
because of all that the Lord has done for us
    and the great favor to the house of Israel
that he has shown them according to his mercy,
    according to the abundance of his steadfast love
. Isaiah 63: 7 NRSVUE

Grateful for the healing that is occurring. Grateful for a loving husband willing to do whatever I ask during this time of recovery. I praise God for church family who lift me constantly in prayer and in person, through texts and greeting cards, always there with me through this long season of recovery.

Zing!!

Be joyful in hope, patient in affliction, faithful in prayer. Romans 12:12 NIV

And God said, “Gotcha, Molly!” Indeed my attention was fully clasped upon that verse.

Yep, I have at times been less that patient in my afflictions. Not always joyful in hope. Trying to be faithful in prayer, but even there I often fall so short.

And where was I convicted? While watching a movie on the channel Great American Family. During recovery, I spend most afternoons watching a movie and trying to do a few rounds of crochet. This particular channel is showing Christmas movies and at commercial breaks they show a Scripture verse.

So there I was with foot elevated, coughing and being convicted that maybe I could live Romans 12:12 a bit better.

Rejoice in hope; be patient in affliction; persevere in prayer. Romans 12:12 NRSVUE

Rejoice in our confident hope. Be patient in trouble, and keep on praying. Romans 12:12 NLT

Rejoice, be joyful – can you do that even when forced to stillness, Molly?

Patient in affliction, in trouble – healing is going to take almost every single day of this summer season. And then I will need to learn to walk with this new equipment in my toe, or as my friend Dan said, my own “hardware store” in my toe.

Persevere, keep on, be faithful in prayer – yes, those needs, Molly. There is the one across the street still battling cancer and now a widower. The church as we try to reach the hurting with the Good News and comfort of Jesus. There is Pete’s family as they prepare his house for the market and decide what to do with his belongings. The one who suffers from Parkinson’s. The two widows down the street. The other with the awful struggle with antisynthetase syndrome. She who is practically bedridden with back pain and a variety of other ailments. The needs for prayer are always there, Molly. Will you be faithful as the Holy Spirit leads you to pray?

Lord, forgive me I pray for falling short of this call from Paul. Help me to bring joy to your heart. Help me to hear you singing over me. Please do not stop encouraging me to do better as your child and daughter of the King of Kings. Amen.

Second Chance! Take A Lesson

We saw this story on the news recently.

What amazes me is how the new parents were willing to feed transplanted chicks! I could imagine one eagle saying to the partner,“But honey, they multiplied over night!!”

If you listened to the 4 minute video Marcie Logsdon, veterinarian, mentions “if the baby is there and begging to be fed, the adults feed it.” Oh! if only humans could be so kind and giving! Perhaps since this is our national bird we could all take a lesson from the Bald Eagle parents.

35 For I was hungry and you gave me food, I was thirsty and you gave me drink, I was a stranger and you welcomed me, 36 I was naked and you clothed me, I was sick and you visited me, I was in prison and you came to me.’ 37 Then the righteous will answer him, saying, ‘Lord, when did we see you hungry and feed you, or thirsty and give you drink? 38 And when did we see you a stranger and welcome you, or naked and clothe you? 39 And when did we see you sick or in prison and visit you?’ 40 And the King will answer them, ‘Truly, I say to you, as you did it to one of the least of these my brothers, you did it to me.’ Matthew 25: 35-40 ESV

Judgement Day

Awoke singing this. Memory from the past? Foretelling the future? Just a fact, Jack? Do not know, but it hangs in my brain this past week.

Very Last Day
Peter, Paul and Mary
Everybody gonna pray on the very last day
Oh, when they hear that bell a-ring the world away
Everybody gonna pray to the Heavens on the judgement day

Oh-well, you can sing about the great king David
And you can preach about the wisdom of Saul
But the judgement falls on all mankind when the trumpet sounds the call
All equal and the same, when the Lord, He calls your name
Get ready, brother, for that day

Everybody gonna pray on the very last day
Oh, when they hear that bell a-ring the world away
Everybody gonna pray to the Heavens on the judgement day

Well, one day soon all men will stand
His word will be heeded in all the land
Men shall know and men shall see
We all are brothers and we all are free
Mankind was made of clay
Each of us in the very same way
Get ready, brother, for that day

Everybody gonna pray on the very last day
Oh, when they hear that bell a-ring the world away
Everybody gonna pray to the Heavens on the judgement day

Oh-well, the law is given and the law is known
The tale is told and the seed is sown
From dust we came into dust we'll go
You the know the Lord once told us so
Each brother takes his hand
Heed the meaning of the Lord's command
Get ready, brother, for that day

Everybody gonna pray on the very last day
Oh, when they hear that bell a-ring the world away
Everybody gonna pray to the Heavens on the judgement day

Written by: Noel Paul Stookey, Peter Yarrow
Album: In The Wind
Released: 1963

Collection to Calm and Bring Joy

A recent quote from the Calm app reads: “We do not need to be fixed. We try to use more force and the key is how to use less force. How to become more efficient rather than more effortful.” wrote Bonnie Bainbridge Cohen.

Can I do that? Just breathe and use less force in seeking change or comfort?

Another quote. The Danish writer Isak Dinesen wrote, “All suffering is bearable if it is seen as part of a story.”

A different experience had me re-imagine, recall if you will, a situation that brought me incredible delight. I remembered how sore my jaws were after smiling so hard on our wedding day.

September, 1970

I was instructed to apply that image when in distress. Molly, recall that joy when TMJ hits. (as part of having Fibromyalgia, temporomandibular joint pain (TMJ) can occur. It is usually short lived, i.e., a day or two.)

Linking TMJ and joy. Worth a try! This page from my Mary Engelbreit calendar expresses it well!

Art by Mary Engelbreit Quote by Manson Cooley

Another quote read, “The most valuable thing we can do for the psyche is let it rest, wander, live in the changing light of a room, not try to be or do anything whatever.” May Sarton

By the time this post is up I will know if a date has been scheduled for my revisionary left foot big toe surgery. Take out steel plate and 6 screws, clean it all up, remove any new arthritis, replace it all. Eight weeks NO WEIGHT BEARING. In other words, sit down, rest, wander in my mind, live in the changing light of a room and not try to go any where except on a knee scooter-roller whatever you call the contraption. Not try to do much of anything.

Doc told me a year ago I need to have it done as it did not heal correctly six years ago. I asked what if I don’t have it done? He said eventually you will not be able to walk. Well, I am having pain and spasms in that foot. Every night I must elevate it and even ice it.

Yep, seeking all the calm and joy I can store up for this adventure!

Not certain which book I was reading but it said, “How often we are headed in the wrong direction, fighting the wrong fight, battling with reality and losing. I thought of the aspects of myself that are like this woman and this man: how I strive over and over again ….”

“I am somewhat dismayed at how often we hang on where we need to let go and give up where we need to persevere.”

Lord my God give me wisdom to let go into your arms. Give me strength and courage to persevere when I feel like giving up. Help me entrust my life to my faithful Creator.

Think on This One

Grateful living is important in the world because in our constant pursuit of more and better we can easily lose sight of the riches that lay right in front of us and within us. Guri Mehta

Are you in a constant pursuit of more and better?
Do you easily lose sight of the riches that are right in front of you?

I can do both of those things. I can be in constant pursuit of more and better, and likely do it with no conscious effort. So soaked in this American culture, asking where is the next great thrill? Where is the next thing I can afford to add to our collection of things? Things we cannot possibly take with us.

What about the things right in front of me? Can I realize there are riches? Not just compared to impoverished countries, but compared to my life decades ago. Yes, there was a time we barely scraped by with the funds Bob earned. We worked and scrimped and saved. Now we are both retired from earning wages and live off what we saved and what he inherited from his parents. Living conscious of our means we seek to not go into debt we cannot repay.

But what about the non-monetary things? The experience of living in close proximity with the neighbors who are both terribly ill makes us more aware of the treasure our love and marriage provide. They have five or six more years of marriage than we do, but in this day and age the longevity of our relationship is nothing to sneeze at. We are blessed.

I have always said, “Divorce is not an option. Murder maybe, but not divorce!” And yes, there are times when we each think of murdering the other. We have not changed each other over this half a century as much as we have adapted to one another. Yet, we are deeply blessed. Grateful living indeed.

As my chronic pain seems to increase and health challenges arise I want to see the life I have as one to be celebrated with gratitude. As evening falls and the physical problems seem to intensify I want to find a way to enter into acceptance of them and rest without trying to do battle. It has been said that we increase our suffering by resisting and wanting things to be different than they are. I know that to be true.

Lord, I need your help to come to the place of rest in all of this. Your remind me in Matthew 11 “Come to me all you who are weary and heavy laden and I will give you rest.” Yes, Lord, help me enter into your rest when it comes to evening pain and distress. Help me rejoice in your presence and great promises. I know you have promised to stay with me to the end. Be very present Lord, I pray.

Go therefore and make disciples of all nations, baptizing them in the name of the Father and of the Son and of the Holy Spirit 20 and teaching them to obey everything that I have commanded you. And remember, I am with you always, to the end of the age.”Matthew 28:19-20 NRSVUE

Every Day

I first heard about CeCe Winans many years ago when I worked at “Having The Courage To Change,” a housing center for women who were coming out of prison and/or drug and alcohol treatment. The women there loved her music and soon I did too!

Do you worship every day? If not, try this one.

All my life you have been so so good.

I’ve known you as a father. I’ve known you as a friend.

As the saying goes: “No god, no peace. Know God, know peace.”

I do not care how you worship. Do you know Jesus and have you spoken with him today?