Project Completed

It is not unusual when I complete a project to feel a release, a let down, perhaps a turning loose of the tension. When I was in retreat and folks around me were celebrating the publication of the book of poems, I was asking the Lord, “What next?”

Several times during the appointed times of prayer at the Convent we read Psalm 139. Verse 4 in the prayer book, which is verse 5 in most Bibles, struck me. The first time I just noted it. The second time I wrote it out. Now I have been doing some study through the Logos app regarding that verse.

The promises here are astounding. You hem me in, behind and before, and lay your hand upon me. Even though I do not feel your touch, your word assures me you lay your hand upon me. I am yours. I am never abandoned, never alone. You shall lead me and hold me fast.

Matthew Henry wrote: “Thou knowest me in every part of me: Thou hast beset me behind and before, so that, go which way I will, I am under thy eye and cannot possibly escape it. Thou hast laid thy hand upon me, and I cannot run away from thee.” Wherever we are we are under the eye and hand of God. Perhaps it is an allusion to the physician’s laying his hand upon his patient to feel how his pulse beats or what temper he is in. God knows us as we know not only what we see, but what we feel and have our hands upon. All his saints are in his hand which tenderly holds their aching head.

U wrote: In proportion as we are fully reconciled to God, and love Him, and rejoice in Him, it will become a cause of joy to reflect that our best Friend is never away from us, that our Protector’s hand is never removed, that the great observant eye of divine love is never closed. 

He continues, “We may judge as to our position before God by this test—is the thought of His constant observation of us a subject of joy or of dread? If we dread it, surely we have the old spirit of bondage still upon us. But if we rejoice in it, then we may know that we have received the Spirit of adoption whereby we cry, “Abba, Father.”  Spurgeon went on to take a military point of view with the idea of Beset me behind and before. My response was, “Really? Do we have to take that view?”

Nelson Study Bible said, “The purpose of His intimate knowledge of His servants is protective and helpful, not judgmental and condemning.”

Yes Lord, I believe this. You protect and help me. As I confess my sins you are faithful and just to forgive me my sins and cleanse me from all unrighteousness. (1 John 1:9) Therefore, I can rest in your encompassing care and closeness. You are my Abba, Father.

And the New Commentary on the Whole Bible by J D Douglas 1990 says,”laid thine hand upon me—This is the body language of blessing (Gen. 48:14, 17). This level of being known and accepted overwhelms the psalmist.”

For me there is nothing to fear in these verses, nothing to run from. Why would I not accept the hand of blessing from my God upon my head? We are known and loved. Do not be overwhelmed. Sit with your God and receive.

Have You Been A Witness to This Much Awe?

She seemed to say, “Now you stay right there!”

Rich Mountain Road is one of Bob’s favorite drives in the Smoky’s. The other is Parson’s Branch road. That one was still not open for the season. Drats.

Rich mountain is described as “a one-way, 7-mile journey on a twisting gravel road that leads north out of Cades Cove and ends in the town of Townsend. The road winds through quiet forest that often features excellent opportunities for wildlife viewing and nature photography.”

“Are you staying put?” she asked.

We stopped the car. Mom thought about challenging us. She had walked towards the car aggressively, (first photo). Then must have realized we meant no harm. (second photo). We waited quietly to see what she would do.

Excellent opportunity indeed! Look who we got to see. The mother was small. Maybe her first cub?

photo by r m dutina

To our amazement they crossed the road in front of us. The remaining photos are taken by me from inside the car!

I think the baby could not have been more than 2 days old?
It reminded both of us of a very small puppy!

As we drove on in amazement, I realized except for the photos, we might be the only people to actually see these two this spring! What an awe inspiring event.

Nothing the rest of the day could top this!

Mist on Mountains Will Pass; The Mountains Abide

We visited Great Smoky Mountains National Park last week. It was wonderful. Bob let me experiment with one of his cameras. I needed lots of coaching! When we created the cover for the book Poems we discovered that the iPhone photos I mainly take did not have enough dpi (dots per inch) to create a good book photo cover. So I set about learning a new skill. Tried to relax as I fudged the photo up then took it again, repeatedly.

The opening photo is from New Found Gap, elevation 5,048 feet. We had to travel there to see most of my favorite spring flowers. With global warming they had already bloomed and faded at the lower elevations. First photo is a hillside just covered by May Apples that were still in bloom.

Just before we arrived I had read this selection from The Edges of His Ways by Amy Carmichael: April 26

Sometimes we wake feeling “down,” and we feel like that all day long for no reason that we can discover, only it is so.
It is useless to try to feel different; trying does not touch feelings. It is useless to argue with oneself; feelings elude arguments. Be patient–feelings are like the mists that cover the mountains in misty weather. The mists pass; the mountains abide. Turn to your Father; tell Him you know that He loves you whether you feel it or not, and that you know that He is with you whether you feel His presence or not. “I beseech Thee,” said one long ago, “let the power of my Lord be great, according as Thou hast spoken, saying, . . .” I suggest that you ask the Holy Spirit to bring some “saying” of His to your mind that has helped you in the past. That saying wherein He has caused us to trust, “the same is my comfort in my trouble: for Thy word hath quickened me.”
Our Lord can enable us so to live that of our inward “toil and dejection” others see nothing.

photo by r m dutina

“The mists pass; the mountains abide.”

I do love the writing of Amy Carmichael! The Lord can enable us so to live that others see nothing of our inward toil and dejection. I am certainly not there yet, but it is a lofty goal. Amy Carmichael suffered “For most of her life, she suffered from a nerve condition called neuralgia, which caused chronic pain, fatigue, and migraines. Then, due to a spine injury, she was bedridden and in severe pain for the last twenty years of her life.” Today Neuralgia is defined “Neuralgia is the medical term for severe, shooting pain that occurs due to a damaged or irritated nerve. Neuralgia can affect any part of the body, causing mild to severe pain.”

Then a spine injury that left her bedridden for 20 years?!? I can hardly imagine. Yet she carried on her Christian ministry in India and wrote booklets that comfort us even to this day.

Lord, thank you for her life and writings. Thank you that she is no longer suffering with pain. Bless her memory I pray.

My Faith Journey Through Prayerful Observations

That is the subtitle of the new publication of my poetry which will be available through Amazon April 30, 2026. On Monday, April 20 Bob and I took Dana to dinner at Nicola’s in downtown Cincinnati to celebrate the completion of this book.

Wondrous bread basket and bread sticks I could live on! When the staff realized we were celebrating the publication of the book, not only were they effusive with their praise, but they brought each of us a glass of champagne! The chef wanted feedback on the foccaia which were were eager to give. It was delicious!

I ordered the Caesar salad and my favorite, Tagliatelle Bolognase, their famous family recipe handed down for generations.

Dana’s Salad

Goat cheese,melted like brie, on the side of the greens

Bob had the mussels.

Then they both had Diver caught Scallop. Chef says if a piece is broken in the kitchen he enjoys them raw. Both Bob and Dana thought they were delicious.

For their Ta-da! moment they both had lamb.

Truly gourmet Lamb with spaghetti

Of course, we all had dessert. Bob ordered his favorite, creme brulee, with a twist. “LAVENDER CRÈME BRULEE with raspberry foam and crystallized orchid.” He loved it and never offered me a single bite. Dana and I shared a dish of chocolate gelato and Citrus Tart Italian Meringue with Amarena cherries. Oh yum.

It was such a lovely evening. Bob, my love, my editor-in-chief and major photographer, did himself proud in treating us. This was a tremendous celebration over years of work that is finally out of my filing cabinet and being released to the world.

Thanks be to God!

Psalm 16 Repeats

Have you ever noticed a Bible verse repeating over and over again in your life?

In our recent readings for the Second Sunday of Easter we read Psalm 16. Verse 11 is especially meaningful to me.

“You show me the path of life.
    In your presence there is fullness of joy;
    in your right hand are pleasures forevermore.
” Psalm 16:11 NRSVUE

When I skipped church as a young teenager and walked the paths in the park worshiping God, it seemed as if David’s experience was my experience, too.

In 1993 I attended a silent retreat. When Psalm 16 came up I felt led to take verse 8 with me and practice God’s presence as I walked the Convent grounds.

I keep the Lord always before me;
    because he is at my right hand, I shall not be moved.
Psalm 16:8 NRSVUE

The practice that day deepened my faith and my trust in this God who is always at my right hand. Isaiah 42: 6 verses a and b go along with this verse.

“I am the Lord, I have called you in righteousness,
    I have taken you by the hand and kept you
…”

When I attended the Jewish funeral service for our dear “Aunt Cloty Gutman” in May, 2002 they read this Psalm. I was deeply touched as I remembered again that we both shared trust in this God whom David extolled.

The path of life, fullness of joy, pleasures forevermore … why would I seek after anything else?

I learned early in life that the God of Jesus is Who I wanted to seek. After dabbling in things of the world and even tasting the occult, I realized that only Jesus is eternal. Only God Almighty is going on forever. That is Who I want to follow. That is Who I want as my leader.

Protect me, God,
for you are my refuge.
I said to Adonai, “You are my Lord;
I have nothing good outside of you.”
The holy people in the land are the ones
who are worthy of honor; all my pleasure is in them.

Those who run after another god
multiply their sorrows;
To such gods I will not offer
drink offerings of blood
or take their names on my lips.

Adonai, my assigned portion, my cup:
you safeguard my share.
Pleasant places were measured out for me;
I am content with my heritage.

I bless Adonai, my counselor;
at night my inmost being instructs me.
I always set Adonai before me;
with him at my right hand, I can never be moved;
so my heart is glad, my glory rejoices,
and my body too rests in safety;
10 for you will not abandon me to Sh’ol,
you will not let your faithful one see the Abyss.
11 You make me know the path of life;
in your presence is unbounded joy,
in your right hand eternal delight.
The Complete Jewish Bible

Plentitude

Here is a great quote:

Gratitude places you in the energy field of plentitude. Glow with gratitude and see how awe and joy will make their home in you. Michael Bernard Beckwith

Br. David Steindl-Rast shares this compelling invitation: “Imagine a society in which mutual trust has the leverage that our present social order accords to fear. Imagine a society in which mutual caring has the leverage that our present social order accords to egotism. If we reach the critical mass of grateful people, a surprising reorientation can take place.”

Brother David has amazing insights and goals that boggle my mind. I want to live in the world he imagines. Mutual trust, mutual caring and a critical mass of grateful people! Yes! Let’s do that instead of all the other nonsense politicians and reporters spend time upon.

Mutual Trust

Mutual Caring

Gratefulness.

Give those a try.

The Same Yet Utterly Different

This is from a meditation sent by Practicing the Way during Holy Week.

“It’s still shocking: Jesus passed through death and, as you read these words, inhabits a body that ate Galilean fish and bears puncture marks from the cross, and yet is utterly different — a “walking, talking piece of new creation,” in the words of BibleProject’s Tim Mackie.

Have you contemplated this idea? Jesus, right now and right there with you, too! Our wonderful Jesus, passed from death into life and per the promise of the Father into us to live and dwell and direct our steps.

Oh such glory to God!

16 And I will ask the Father, and he will give you another Advocate, to be with you forever. 17 This is the Spirit of truth, whom the world cannot receive because it neither sees him nor knows him. You know him because he abides with you, and he will be in you.

1“I will not leave you orphaned; I am coming to you. 19 In a little while the world will no longer see me, but you will see me; because I live, you also will live. 20 On that day you will know that I am in my Father, and you in me, and I in you. 21 They who have my commandments and keep them are those who love me, and those who love me will be loved by my Father, and I will love them and reveal myself to them.” John 14:16-21 NRSVUE

The same, “yet utterly different.”

It is said He walked on earth fifty days before the ascension. As He lives and moves within us I propose that He is still walking the earth. Ponder that. Pray with that idea. Thank the Almighty for this amazing work.

Oh. Brings me to stillness and quiet within. Let all the earth keep silence before Him. Let all the earth declare His mighty works of glory.

 If the Spirit of him who raised Jesus from the dead dwells in you, he who raised Christ Jesus from the dead will give life to your mortal bodies also through his Spirit that dwells in you. Romans 8:11 NRSVUE

Surrender to the Holy Spirit. Let Christ live and move through you. Wait before the Lord in every endeavor. Trust God to work through you as you walk in obedience to the Almighty. Be amazed at the Indwelling Christ. And give thanks.

Why Meditate on Scripture?

https://www.cslewisinstitute.org/resources/biblical-meditation/ has a terrific article well worth your time to read. Here is part of it: Meditating on the Scriptures is vital practice for maturing in the Christian life. As one anonymous writer said, “The Bible is not meant merely to inform but to transform.” Throughout history, godly leaders have commended the transforming effects of meditation. Consider this beautiful description by Thomas Brooks, a seventeenth-century church leader:

Remember that it is not hasty reading but serious meditation on holy and heavenly truths, that makes them prove sweet and profitable to the soul. It is not the mere touching of the flower by the bee that gathers honey, but her abiding for a time on the flower that draws out the sweet. It is not he that reads most but he that meditates most that will prove to be the choicest, sweetest, wisest and strongest Christian.

I used to tell some fellow Bible students that I was not impressed if they could recite all the books of the Bible, even if they could recite those books in backwards order. To me the best accomplishment was if one could LIVE a single verse. I cannot attempt to come close to living a verse if I am unaware of the heart of God towards me. I get closer by trying to understand Hesed, loving kindness, mercy, grace and compassion. All of that for each of us. Knowing I can not do anything to make God love me more. Knowing God will never choose to love me less, motivates me to want to become more like Jesus. I have gained this knowledge from reading the Word of God, sitting with those concepts over decades, trusting to believe this even about myself.

Have you tried meditation? The practice has gotten a bad name from Christians who are motivated by fear. Understand that this is sometime that God has called us to throughout the Bible. Do your own study on the concept. Practice it a few times. Then try it a few more times. Be still and listen for the voice of the Lord to your heart and soul. I think you might find this a way to stir your soul into a deeper walk.

For this reason I remind you to rekindle the gift of God that is within you through the laying on of my hands, for God did not give us a spirit of cowardice but rather a spirit of power and of love and of self-discipline. 2 Timothy 1: 6-7 NRSVUE

The love and care God has extended to me has changed me as a person.

3You have given me the shield of your salvation,
    and your right hand supported me,
    and your gentleness made me great.
36 You gave a wide place for my steps under me,
    and my feet did not slip.
Psalm 18:35-36 ESV

What has your meditation on the Word of God done for you? Have you learned more about the character of God? Have you allowed the Spirit of God to make changes in you? What might the future hold if you made it your practice to meditate upon the Word and upon the character of the Trinity? Are you willing to give it a try?

Read and then spend sixty seconds of quiet in the Presence of the Living God. Then two minutes. Then five. Move along to ten as you are able. It truly is a practice. Not something we accomplish and then stop.

Grip not Gripe

I frequently think of a quote about the grip of God upon me. Then I do not remember where I read it, saw it, foudn it ….grr. Well, I came across it again last week. I suppose I need to make a poster or 8 x 10 of it and just put it on my wall!

Amy Carmichael wrote in The Edges of His Ways, March 15,

She says Rotherham translates Ephesians 1:19 According to the energy of the grasp of His might. She goes on to write, “It is not my grip of Christ, but Christ’s grip of me: said an old Scotswoman long ago. This is a great word for anyone who feels futile, but it is also a great word for us all. And I think of Paul so conscious of the greatness of his power (power whose lightest touch could have snapped his chains) that he could describe that power in heaped-up words of wonder. Yet he was so utterly content in his prison – so unoffended – that his Lord could use him to write deathless letters like this. What a God and what a servant! And He, Who made him what he was, is our God, even ours.”

That just makes me sit and want to read it over and over until I am saturated with the truth from it. You can read her book at this site https://archive.org/details/edgesofhiswaysse0000carm/page/38/mode/2up. It is also available at Olive Tree Bible Study https://www.olivetree.com/store/product/16733?internal_source=store_search&internal_source_id=product_list

I wish I had known the old Scotswoman, don’t you? Thank goodness her understanding of our Lord is recorded.

I want to be as content as Paul, whatever my condition in life.

 I am not saying this because I am in need, for I have learned to be content whatever the circumstances. 12 I know what it is to be in need, and I know what it is to have plenty. I have learned the secret of being content in any and every situation, whether well fed or hungry, whether living in plenty or in want. 13 I can do all this through him who gives me strength. Philippians 4:11-13 NIV

Content – not prone to gripe. Gripe is complain with grumbling. Yuck. Is that me?

We have a neighbor couple who are both desperately ill and there is no cure for either of them. Walking with them reminds me of when Bob almost died in 2018. And it also reminds me that even though I have chronic pain and things that plague my health, I am okay. I am not dying. As Rick Hanson, phd teaches, “I am okay right now. ” Never have Bob and I both been deathly ill at the same time. Our neighbor man is hospitalized and so worried about his wife who is losing strength and is only visiting every other day now. He does not like being away from her but he is still too sick to go home.

Could you be content in a similar situation? Could having interaction with these two remind you not to gripe? We too often feel entitled to gripe and complain. Yet we live in the richest nation on earth. Though the politics in our country has gone outside the bounds of decency we have previously encountered, we have many of our freedoms in tact. Can we practice contentment for one day? One full week? Perhaps a month? Could we follow Paul and learn so much about our God that there would be no room in our life and in our mouth for complaining and grumbling?

Perhaps you might want it give it a try? Lent continues until April 5. Maybe these would help you draw closer to God. Each time you hear yourself out loud or in your mind complaining and grumbling, draw close to God and be still. It could work wonders for your soul. We mostly resist any message about ourselves having sin and needing to be cleansed. However, that is true about each and every one of us. None of us has a pure and blameless heart.

Abba Arsenius said, “If we seek God, he will appear to us. If we grasp him, he will stay with us.”

Submit yourselves therefore to God. Resist the devil, and he will flee from you. Draw near to God, and he will draw near to you. Cleanse your hands, you sinners, and purify your hearts, you double-minded. Lament and mourn and weep. Let your laughter be turned into mourning and your joy into dejection. 10 Humble yourselves before the Lord, and he will exalt you. James 4: 7-10 NRSVUE