Hope

Hope is a thin and slippery thing, sorely tested and hard to come by in this culture. Hope reminds us that there is nothing in life we have not faced that we did not, through God’s gifts and graces—however unrecognized at the time—survive. Hope is the recall of good in the past, on which we base our expectation of good in the future, however bad the present. It digs in the rubble of the heart for memory of God’s promise to bring good out of evil and joy out of sadness and, on the basis of those memories of the past, takes new hope for the future. Even in the face of death. Even in the fear of loss. Even when our own private little worlds go to dust, as sooner or later, they always do.

Advent calls us to hope in the promise that God is calling us to greater things and will be with us as we live them.
                      —Joan Chittister, excerpts from “Unwrap the Gifts of Advent”

Have you embraced hope yet this Advent season? I just loved when we were in Church this past Sunday and the Priest declared, “Happy New Year!” for Advent is the beginning of the New Year for the liturgical church. I was feeling neither happy nor joyful when I walked in. Even after participating in communion I was wavering in my own cares. As the day wore on I finally worked my way out of that situation with good reminders from Desmond Tutu and the Dalai Lama.

I was reminded in The Book of Joy that most of my suffering that day was due to “too much self-regard.”

“The more time you spend thinking about yourself, the more suffering you will experience.”
― Dalai Lama XIV, The Book of Joy: Lasting Happiness in a Changing World

Some distasteful events around Thanksgiving that upset me were less unsettling when I embraced much less, much, much less self-regard. The choices of another had more to do with them than with me. An act of kindness that was not needed sent me into a tailspin, but that was due to another not being truthful and clear. When I decided to let my feelings go and choose the path of compassion and peace I was settled rapidly.

None of this is easy, but I am trying to learn. Like I have said, I read this book several years ago and I gleaned a lot of wisdom from it. I know I did not take the lessons and practices to heart and I wish I had. Perhaps I would be on a more even keel now if I had?

Hope reminds us that there is nothing in life we have not faced that we did not, through God’s gifts and graces—however unrecognized at the time—survive. Joan Chittister

Though there are times when life is painful we can embrace the fact that through God’s gifts and graces we can survive this, too.

Victor Frankl wrote in Man’s Search for Meaning, We who lived in concentration camps can remember the men who walked through the huts comforting others, giving away their last piece of bread. They may have been few in number, but they offer sufficient proof that everything can be taken from a man but one thing: the last of the human freedoms – to choose one’s attitude in any given set of circumstances, to choose one’s own way.

No matter what family members may send your way the rest of this year, you have the freedom to choose your attitude in any given circumstance. It took me a few days to make my way through this, and I am not proud of the pain the midst of that delay, but I eventually chose grace and compassion for the person. The wise men in The Book of Joy state repeated that the greatest thing to lose on earth is one’s compassion for others; losing one’s heart and losing one’s humanity.

My soul still occasionally spouts off snide remarks about the event, but Brother Lawrence continues to remind me that “Useless thoughts spoil everything, and much mischief begins there.” If I want to live with composure, peace and joy I must “take captive those thoughts to Christ Jesus” (2 Corinthians 10:5) and let God have the final word even in the way I think!

Seeing and Being Grateful

This is the time of year when there is much talk about giving thanks. The election made many of us question so many things. Perhaps it is time to get away from politics and back to the basics of faith?

How do we see the world as sacred again? By radical noticing. Looking for awe in all of life. -Lucy Jones

Regardless of whether your candidate won or lost, the world is still sacred. The majority of human beings are still kind. We were in traffic the other day and there were two other drivers actually letting folks turn left in front of them. We were delighted to witness that people can still be kind after all the ugly rhetoric that has been flying.

“Radical noticing.”

The leaves have finally all fallen from our spindly little oak tree out front. There is a nest that remains. Occasionally a bird will perch on the edge of the empty nest awaiting its turn at the feeder. I do not know who lived right in my front yard, right outside my window in our office where I write this blog. I find that amazing! I thought I was observant. Looking for awe in all of life, I missed that one! If I had a drone camera I would send you a picture of that architectural wonder nestled right along the trunk of that oak!

“Looking for awe in all of life.”

I asked Alexa to play music by George Winston during dinner the other night. Suddenly the theme from a Charlie Brown Thanksgiving came on. I thought, “Stupid Alexa. I asked for George Winston.” Ha! There is a George Winston collection called Thanksgiving and it not only has that song but also the Great Pumpkin Waltz and others. I had no idea, I just know I like his arrangements and compositions.

Time to take notice of the little things in life that have gone right past me. Eyes off politics and back to the wonders of creation and music and the Word of God.

Don’t be anxious about anything; rather, bring up all of your requests to God in your prayers and petitions, along with giving thanks. Then the peace of God that exceeds all understanding will keep your hearts and minds safe in Christ Jesus. Philippians 4:6-7

Jesus took the bread in his hands and gave thanks to God. Then he passed the bread to the people, and he did the same with the fish, until everyone had plenty to eat. John 6:11

Be filled with the Spirit; speaking one to another in psalms and hymns and spiritual songs, singing and making melody with your heart to the Lord; giving thanks always for all things in the name of our Lord Jesus Christ to God, even the Father. Ephesians 5:18-20

In every thing give thanks, for this is the will of God in Christ Jesus concerning you. 1 Thessalonians 5:18

My friend Dan posted the photo below. Love it!

Quietness

One thing that is difficult for me to do is to maintain quietness in my heart and mind. My “life verse” Isaiah 30:15 helps me with this, WHEN I remember it!

This is what the Sovereign Lord, the Holy One of Israel, says:

“In repentance and rest is your salvation,
    in quietness and trust is your strength,
    but you would have none of it.”
Isaiah 30:15

In the Book of Common Prayer I am often frustrated because the scriptures used are not given a cross reference. I delighted when I came across this prayer in the Book of Common Prayer on Page 832. For this prayer, I already knew the Scripture!

Prayers for Family and Personal Life 59. For Quiet Confidence

O God of peace, who hast taught us that in returning and
rest we shall be saved, in quietness and confidence shall be
our strength: By the might of thy Spirit lift us, we pray thee,
to thy presence, where we may be still and know that thou
art
 God; through Jesus Christ our Lord. Amen.

When Bob and Jeff were both confirmed in the Episcopal Church we stayed in that community for many years. When the choir director set up every song during worship in Latin, I was furious, declaring “If we are going to sing in Latin I think we ought to sing in tongues with or without interpretation!” Irish German temper showing there! We then migrated from the Episcopal church to the Vineyard.

When we worshiped at the Vineyard at the time they were on the cutting edge of contemporary worship music. Many scriptures were incorporated into lyrics. One of the best ways to learn scripture is to sing it! And we sang, learned and the Word of God went into our hearts. This is one of those songs from long ago. The lyrics for the song are below. Hear it as the Trinity singing to you.

Song for the Bride, written by Brian Doerksen

I have longed to hold you in my arms
And take all of your fear away
I will take your filthy rags
And make them clean

If you receive my love
If you will receive my love
Return to me
And hear my spirit say

In repentance and rest
Is your salvation
In quietness and trust
Is your strength

Return to me
Return to me
And hear my spirit say

Return to me
Says the Lord
Let me love you once again

In repentance and rest
Is your salvation
In quietness and trust
Is your strength

I hope you will sit with the song, listen to it more than once and open your heart and mind to God’s love for you, His Bride. Can you envision yourself as the Bride of Christ? He longs for our fellowship with Him. If you wonder about the image of a Bride consider reviewing these verses.

The Trinity desires intimacy with us just as a bride and groom are intimate with each other. Jesus literally wants to ‘walk with us and talk with us’ as we journey through this life. Preparations are being made to take us to His side in the next.

I pray you will find rest in with the Groom now, in this time and place. I pray you will carry a reminder that you can enter that rest at any time. Choose to stay there. Do not fulfill that last part of Isaiah 30:15 NRSVA “but you refused.”

There remains, then, a Sabbath-rest for the people of God; for anyone who enters God’s rest also rests from their works, just as God did from his. Let us, therefore, make every effort to enter that rest, so that no one will perish by following their example of disobedience. Hebrews 4:9-11

The Wisdom of Fun

I attended a Soul Collage retreat last weekend. Mooydeen C. Frees, (R.N., MAPC, MEd, diploma in Spiritual Direction, Trained SoulCollage Facilitator and Retired Deacon) conducts these on occasion at the Sisters of Charity convent. There are literally thousands of magazine photos cut out and arranged on tables by topic. Participants are provided with a work table, ruler, Exact-o knife, glue stick, matte board, scissors, roller, clear sleeves for storage, etc., everything you would need to make a 5 x 8 inch collage. We are then set free to make as many or as few collages as we desire.

Some folks have told me they did not want to attend because they do not see themselves as artistic. This does not have to do with art as much as finding pictures that speak to your soul and then assembling them in a collage to express yourself.

We arrived at 8:45 and began making our cards at about 9:30. Broke for lunch at noon and began again about 12:30. This process helps tap into some deep places of the soul. We are told to strive for metaphor as that keeps us out the part of the left brain where too much rational/logical thinking occurs.

I made one card that was wrenching with the honest pain of the past few months. I was exhausted when it was finished. Then I also made a card that reminded me of the wisdom of having fun. Some photos I had gathered at other Soul Collage retreats. This time I was determined to incorporate them in one or more collages for myself.

Mooydeen cautioned us about not posting these online as many of the magazine images are copyrighted. Well, I looked up two of the images I used and they were online so I assume they are alright to share?

In the lower right corner is a young child laughing. She reminds me of myself as a child. Next to her is the image below. As if she is watching Mr. Pavarotti and laughing with great joy!

Besides the serious opera star saying to me not to take life too seriously, he reminds me of my husband Bob. Bob cannot get in a swimming pool without spitting a similar fountain! Bob’s fountain is usually aimed at whoever is closest to him in the water.

Above Pavarotti is an owl perched on a pole. The owl always symbolizes wisdom, so of course the owl needed to be here. The owl reminds me there is wisdom in having fun.

Upper right hand corner is a wheelbarrow full of monkeys. The exact photo I used was online!!

Look at their varied expressions! Remind you of folks you know? “More fun than a barrow of monkeys!” Not a barrel in this case, but a wheelbarrow. Guess they like to ride? I do not see any straps or means of making them stay in, do you?

Card reading consists of using the statement, “I am the one who .. ” has learned to laugh even during difficult, painful times. ” I am the one who…” wonders what monkey brains are pondering as they ride along. “I am the one who…” is learning the wisdom of humor. ” I am the one who…” hopes I am never too old to delight like a child.

I used one image of an old woman shedding tears in two of my collages. Yes, there are things to cry about and tears help provide that emotional release. There is value in tears. There is also value in laughter.

Where are your humor images today? How can you keep laughing even in the midst of hard, painful times?

Trouble sleeping?

Recently the CALM app offered another half price subscription. I decided to take them up on the deal. I had a subscription during Covid and it really helped me. The bedtime stories for adults can be soothing! They offer all sorts of things for adult centering and prayer.

Calm is a mental health app that helps you manage stress, sleep better, and live a happier life. It offers guided meditations, sleep stories, soundscapes, and more to support your well being. Calm your mind – change your life. Mental health is hard. Getting support doesn’t need to be. Our app puts the tools to feel better in your back pocket, with personalized content to manage stress and anxiety, get better sleep, and feel more present in your life. Relax your mind, and wake up as the person you want to be.”

I find that after this election cycle I need to remain calm in so many areas of my life. I have stopped watching the national news. After the last term of Donald Trump was over, I found I had an almost PTSD type reaction to his voice on the television. I do not want to go back to that cringing response.

The three oldest Dutina siblings asking, “Now what?!?”

There are a few places in Scripture that speak about sleep. I kept sort of remembering a verse and then it would slip my mind. Recently I nailed it down. Psalm 4 is used in Compline. There are only 8 verses in this particular Psalm. I hope you will look it up in your favorite version. The verse to cling to is:

I will both lie down and sleep in peace,
    for you alone, O Lord, make me lie down in safety.
Psalm 4:8RSV

This Scripture is powerful and even better than the Calm app. I can step out of the room if Bob wants to watch the national news and use the Calm app, or read towards the Zoom study/discussion group. I can mark the printed blog pages to pull out things for a booklet. There are many things I can do besides watch the National news, which usually reports about 95% bad news.

Psalm 127:3c says “The Lord gives to His beloved sleep.” Rest in the mighty Trinity, beloved.

The Book of Joy

I read this book of conversations between the Dalai Lama and Archbishop Desmond Tutu several years ago. It was first published in 2016. Recently a friend asked me to join a zoom discussion group about the book. I began reading it again and have had some difficulty keeping up with the reading assignment as I realize that this time around I want to study the book and apply to myself the wisdom these two men offer about life and emotions. For me these are lessons to be studied and practiced, not breezed through. Guess last time I hurried through them? Or perhaps I only took what I could use at the time and left the remainder to be re-discovered this time. Regardless, I have the book in digital kindle form. Now I think I need it in paperback so I can more easily reference the study notes and practices at the back of the book. For the moment I am flipping back and forth between the text and index.

We create most of our suffering, so it should be logical that we also have the ability to create more joy. When it comes to personal happiness there is a lot that we as individuals can do. Dalai Lama & Archbishop Desmond Tutu

“You show your humanity,” the Archbishop began, “by how you see yourself not as apart from others but from your connection to others. .” They both go on to point out that we need to recognize each other as human. The Dali Lama repeatedly mentioned that there are seven (now eight) billion of us on the earth. “We are each human. We are same human beings. No need for introduction. Same human face, when we see one another we immediately know this is a human brother or sister. Whether you know them or not, you can smile and say hello.”

The book is also a study in how we can learn to tame and train our emotional selves toward more health and stability. Both of these men have suffering greatly during this life and perhaps that is what developed in them such a deep well of joy and laughter.

Though an introvert, with strangers I am usually an “outgoing” person. I have embarrassed all of my family members at one time or another by greeting people whom I have never met. I even strike up conversations with many of them. I make it my business to especially compliment young folks as they are so often unaware that they are lovely or have terrific eyes, or whatever strikes me as useful. In the book they point out how we all too often distance ourselves from others unnecessarily.

I think as the election results are announced later this week these lessons about Joy and Life will be especially useful for me. I pray regardless of who you voted for that there will be some comfort from the Lord showing how to live with the views that may differ from your choice for President.

Each of us is human. We create distance between ourselves by not offering grace, forgiveness, mercy and loving kindness to one another. One commentator mentioned the wisdom they teach in this book, such as fear, anger and hatred, exist internally as well as externally. I have noted that politics does not rule the Kingdom of God. We choose whether we will walk in paths of righteousness and peace with one another.

These men offer great wisdom for how we, as a nation, can go forward after all of this hurtful rhetoric and judgement of one another. Maybe this time we humans can learn a higher way, a better way of living and loving?

Please God keep us from violence toward one another. Rigid opinions sometimes promote us to hatred. Help us to conform to the image of Jesus. The Dalai Lama and the late Anglican Archbishop Desmond Tutu both knew paths to peace. Help us to choose the same for America.

And a highway will be there;
    it will be called the Way of Holiness;
    it will be for those who walk on that Way.
The unclean will not journey on it;
    wicked fools will not go about on it.
No lion will be there,
    nor any ravenous beast;
    they will not be found there.
But only the redeemed will walk there,
10     and those the Lord has rescued will return.
They will enter Zion with singing;
    everlasting joy will crown their heads.
Gladness and joy will overtake them,
    and sorrow and sighing will flee away
. Isaiah 35:8-10 NIV

And So It Begins

When we endlessly ruminate over distant times, we miss extraordinary things in the present moment. These extraordinary things are, in actual fact, all we have: the here and now. Katherine May

Have you done this? Found yourself wandering in the past or future and missing the obvious present? The horse is similar in that it can be distracted by surroundings, spooked by things it does not understand, stressed by unfamiliar sights, and its eyes can be injured. Often, the owners or trainers put blinders or blinkers on a horse.

“The idea of blinders is to reduce the horse’s vision in a way that keeps them relaxed and paying attention to what they need to pay attention to.” online source

Lately I have been praying that the Lord will help me keep my eyes fixed on the Trinity. The stresses of family, politics, current events have the tendency to distract and upset me. In order to serve my Lord well, I must keep my eyes on His goals for me. The here and now is where God wants me. My eyes fixed on the transcendent eternal holiness of this Majestic Presence who cares so much for me.

Let us throw off everything that hinders and the sin that so easily entangles. And let us run with perseverance the race marked out for us, fixing our eyes on Jesus, the pioneer and perfecter of faith. For the joy set before Him He endured the cross, scorning its shame, and sat down at the right hand of the throne of God. Consider Him who endured such opposition from sinners, so that you will not grow weary and lose heart. Hebrews 12:1b-3

Throw off the things that hinder this. Cast aside the sin that so easily entangles. Run with perseverance the journey laid out before us. FIXING our eyes on Jesus. No matter how you do that, just do it! The perfecter and pioneer of our faith, He lived out his life, even with the suffering, for the JOY set before Him. He endured the cross, scorned shame, completed His task and sat down with the Father. Consider Him..again and again … consider Him. Do not get distracted. And if you do get distracted, do what Brother Lawrence taught. Return to Him who loves you best and start again. Left to myself, Lord, I am will always wander and sin. Keep me at Your side and with my eyes FIXED on You.

My latest travel off the path laid before me was remedied first by recognition and then by confession. I used one of my Christian music playlists, until finally my heart began to let go of the distractions and sing to Christ, my Savior. When I awoke the next morning I had to begin again to make the Living God my focus and not be led astray by thoughts that distract me.

“The serenity, the courage and the wisdom,” as the Serenity prayer teaches. The serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things I can and the wisdom to know the difference. I am responsible for where my attention goes and how long it stays there. There is so much choice in our lives and we rarely take responsibility for our own thoughts and actions. Yet we must if we are to be faithful disciples. In the letter to the Corinthians Paul wrote, “This light and momentary affliction is producing …

17 For our slight, momentary affliction is producing for us an eternal weight of glory beyond all measure, 18 because we look not at what can be seen but at what cannot be seen, for what can be seen is temporary, but what cannot be seen is eternal. 2 Corinthians 4: 17-18 NRSV

The New King James says it is working for us a far more exceeding and eternal weight of glory..

I do not like to think that distraction, my tendency to think of the past or far into the future, are working for me. When I become aware of it, it does teach me that I must be vigilant about where I let my thoughts wander. Yes, it is up to me. The Holy Spirit will assist me, but the weakness is mine, all mine, and made stronger by the spiritual forces against me. Yes, we must choose the Way of Christ, over and over again: to love the Lord our God with all of our heart, all of our mind, all of our strength. We must resist the forces of darkness that want to extinguish the Light of Christ within us. Good news: the Word says the darkness cannot put it out!

Take Hold

12 Not that I have already obtained all this, or have already arrived at my goal, but I press on to take hold of that for which Christ Jesus took hold of me. 13 Brothers and sisters, I do not consider myself yet to have taken hold of it. But one thing I do: Forgetting what is behind and straining toward what is ahead, 14 I press on toward the goal to win the prize for which God has called me heavenward in Christ Jesus. Philippians 3:12-14

One person said, “It is not my grip on Christ, but His grip upon me.” Do you ever doubt the grip of Christ? He who bears the nail scarred hands in His resurrected body is not weakened by the suffering He endured. He is stronger since His resurrection from the dead than He was before His death. Brandon Lake sings “there is more strength, more power in the hem of His garment than in the camp of the enemy. ” I firmly believe that. Do you?

The Garments of God visual reflection of poem by Jessica Powers. Painted by Doris Klein, CSA

Yes, I need to keep a grip upon Christ. This poem reflects that sentiment.

That just sums it up for me so powerfully. Just like my times with God in the basement under-stairs closet, I can clutch the hem of His garments and know He loves me. He sees me. I am known.

I pray you will sit at His feet as Brandon sings you this refrain. May your faith be strengthened, too!

The Latest on Mental Illness Person

The person I have been concerned about is getting treatment. Much to the delight of those who love that person, several different modalities are being used to approach healing. Pray they find the best medication with the least side effects to promote healing. The quote below is true of my situation the last couple of weeks.

Admitting grief does not diminish us, it strengthens us and makes us more compassionate.

TREBBE JOHNSON

I am doing much better with my own mental health after prayer, listening to an Old Testament story in several versions and taking notes on it. Seeing how this story is also direction from the Father as to how I can move forward. Talking with a compassionate friend has also helped. This has not been an easy 2 weeks, but there is light at the end of the tunnel and it is not a freight train!

May you have the courage to admit your own grief. May you find the strength in that admission. May you be willing to do the work necessary to create a deeper compassion within you.

Blessings, MollyLin

Mr. Tanner

Harry Chapin wrote and sang a song about Mr. Tanner. He was a dry cleaner and he loved to sing. His friends pressured him to go to New York to have an agent for singers who wanted to advance their careers provide him with a concert venue. The lyrics say, “Music was his life, it was not his livelihood. He did not know how well he sang; it just made him whole.”

The reviews after his concert were not terrific. He never sang again, except late at night when he was alone in the dry cleaning shop. I do not want to become Mr. Tanner. There are interesting videos on YouTube of the actual man who inspired “Mr. Tanner.” His name is Martin Tubridy. There is even a video of the song at a benefit concert for the Harry Chapin foundation where he sings the lines attributed to him. The real-life story is that Martin did not give up his singing career.

A few of my friends have encouraged me to explore publishing my writing. Mostly I feel nudges from the Lord. I have come to the realization that my writing may not ever make it into publication, (no I have not stopped trying). There is a massive work for selection of pieces and re-writing of those pieces that would have to occur. I will most definitely need an editor. (Average pay is $30 an hour.) I am not getting any younger. This writing about my life with Christ keeps me whole. I am so grateful for those who read the blog regularly.

So I continue to ask prayers for guidance from the Lord on how to proceed with all this. As phone calls and appointments interrupt my writing time and life overall intrudes, I will need to carve away dedicated time for the work. The Lord assured me months ago that it would indeed be work.

Prayer © 1979  Molly Lin Dutina 
A prayer
Prayed in truth and faith
Through the Blood of Jesus,
Is as a drop of water
Upon the river of life;
Sending out endless
Ripples and waves
Throughout creation.

As the prayer is said
The answer begins movement.

In case you have never heard Mr. Tanner here is a link with lyrics.