Grateful for a Flicker

At our first home at times we were blessed to have a flicker visit the bird feeder. If I only caught a glimpse as it flew away I could tell it was a Flicker by the yellow band under its tail. It had a very long beak, black stripe under the chin like a fancy man ready fora night out. Black cheeks, red spot on back of the head. BUT WAIT!! There’s more!! Dashes and dots on the feathers.

Northern Flicker photo from online

At our house now they have decided that they are hungry enough to come to the suet feeder right outside the office window. Just now I heard a chirping. Rolled slowed back in my chair to see who was there. And wow! Was I delighted!! Like the photo above it had suet on its beak.

That is almost too much decoration for a single bird! Welcome glamour girl, (or boy)!

There have also been loads of bluebirds throughout the winter! Even though the Grackles finished off the dried meal worms, the bluebirds keep coming for the suet and seeds.

Blessed for their company this winter, photo from online
Some say lovely, I say ugh! Online photo

The starlings and I have a battle over the feeder. They are terrified of movement and I am quick to shoo them away every chance I get.They leave poop every where. Can empty a feeder in nothing flat and decimate a suet block “Presto-Chango” to nothing!

As soon as I find meal worms again I will fill that feeder. For now, birdies, it is seed and suet for y’all!

Do you ever wonder where they all sleep at night?

26 Look at the birds of the air, for they neither sow nor reap nor gather into barns; yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not of more value than they? 27 Which of you by worrying can add one cubit to his stature? Matthew 6: 26-27

Which of you by worrying can add one more beat to his heart? No, the heart issue is not resolved and never far from my mind. I am trying to take the advice of my LORD and rest in His care.

Yikes!

If you want to take your mind off your situation, try tearing up your office! We have talked for a year or two about replacing the nasty contractors white carpeting in our office and putting in vinyl flooring instead. It is difficult to roll our office chairs on this rug. And the rug now has stains of various kind on it.

Bob decided the beginning of this year was ideal to have it done. We went to the hardware store to pick out flooring. They arranged for someone to come measure with his handy dandy electronic measuring device. It took him maybe 5 minutes total?

They shipped the flooring to the house and put it in our garage. Later, via email they told us it had to come to room temperature in advance of installation. We asked Grandgirl Ellie, who is super strong from her gym workouts, to come help move it. She gladly did.

Our snowbird neighbors have been letting us use their empty garage throughout this storm. We are doubly grateful now since we need a place in our garage to put all this STUFF! So far, sounds simple, right? The closet floor is a major storage area for us with many tubs of items including two cases of printer paper. All of that needed to be cleared. (We rolled the larger case of paper to the garage on an old chair with wheels.)

Just the closet floor things here

We set up tables in the garage for the books. And I mean books! We have a lovely Amish built bookcase, but we had to empty it for the installers to move it out while they work.

Did I mention there are cookbooks, too?

There are two printers to dismantle as one was dying and we went ahead and bought the new one. As you may know, I call my husband “Mr. Tidy” because his living area is always tidy, including his desktop. My desk, on the other hand, is likely to be 3-6 inches deep with stuff.

So I will be busy and distracted the next few days. Might not get all the blog entries written between today (Saturday morning) and the times they usually post. This is my note from home.

Nothing like a huge mess to make you realized you do not need to keep some of that stuff! The new flooring will be wonderful! The dismantle and reassemble, not so much. But I am truly grateful for the distraction and the results will be great! So glad we do not have to remove the photos from the walls. That would be an undertaking, indeed!

In everything give thanks; for this is the will of God in Christ Jesus for you. 1 Thessalonians 5:18 NKJV

Did I Take Enough Care?

Many years ago I found this statement and put it into cross stitch. “Self Care is not selfish.” This was crucial for me as I ventured into healing from a family of alcoholism and criticism. A friend who was enrolled in Weight Watchers loved it and needed to hear it, too. I eventually threw it in a drawer and come across it from time to time.

Saint Francis is quoted as saying at the end of his life that he wished he had taken better care of Brother Ass. That was his name for his body. He participated in many methods of extreme ascetic practices. I never did that, but my Brother Ass could have used more tender loving care. I tried to cling to Paul’s verse, but was never good at it for very long.

but I pommel my body and subdue it, lest after preaching to others I myself should be disqualified. 1 Corinthians 9:27 RSV

On the other hand, I live in America and am overfed and under exercised. I can give you whole lists of reasons trying to justify my lack of consistent exercise, but that is not my point. Did I take enough good care of myself? Probably not.

Self-care is never a selfish act – it is simply good stewardship of the only gift I have, the gift I was put on earth to offer to others. -Parker Palmer

This heart health crisis shows me that no, I did not do all that I should have to take care of myself. I worked hard on my emotional health, psychological health, spiritual health, but more than likely my physical health went by the wayside. Yes, I adapted healthy recipes and tried not to feed our family things known to be unhealthy. But physical self-care for me? Not much of a priority.

Brother Lawrence taught me that “Useless thoughts spoil everything and much mischief begins there. We ought to reject them as soon as we perceived their impertinence and return to our communion with God.” So I speak with God about these failures in my past and accept forgiveness. Then move back into communion with Him: speaking to Him, my heart open towards the Trinity. Guilt and shame only get me stuck in the muck.

All we have is now. That is why it is called the present. The present moment of seeking the Holy One, staying with thoughts of compassion, love unconditional and infinite, intimate knowledge.

I am already making dietary changes from regular brewed coffee ( I love it!) to espresso or tea. I need to find a tasty decaf coffee at the store. From regular tea to decaf only. (What do I do with those Starbucks dollars in my account? I can hear my husband saying he will use them to buy desserts or sandwiches there!)

You know your own weakness, be it not enough exercise or too much caffeine and/or sugar. Are you giving enough thought to your own self-care in all aspects of your life? I am praying you find a balance for each one. Below is a chart from the Mayo Clinic to help you get started. It does not show the grams of carbs. I won’t get started on that! I left off the part about energy drinks. I do not use them, but they are loaded with caffeine on purpose!

Coffee drinksSize in oz. (mL)Caffeine (mg)
Brewed8 (237)96
Brewed, decaf8 (237)2
Espresso1 (30)64
Espresso, decaf1 (30)0
Instant8 (237)62
Instant, decaf8 (237)2
TeasSize in oz. (mL)Caffeine (mg)
Brewed black8 (237)47
Brewed black, decaf8 (237)2
Brewed green8 (237)28
Ready-to-drink, bottled8 (237)19
SodasSize in oz. (mL)Caffeine (mg)
Citrus (most brands)8 (237)0
Cola8 (237)22
Root beer (most brands)8 (237)0

Embrace the gift of today with open communication with the Lord, a clean slate, sins recognized and forgiven, moving on in the present with the Presence and into a bright future.

If we live, we live to the Lord, and if we die, we die to the Lord; so then, whether we live or whether we die, we are the Lord’s. Romans 15:8 NRSVU

Jonathon

in Edges of His Ways Amy Carmichael writes of the relationship between David and Jonathon. told in 1 Samuel 23:16.

Then Jonathan went to his house, and David abode in the wood with God. Then Jonathan, Saul’s son, arose and went to David in the woods and strengthened his hand in God. 1 Samuel 23:16
Amy wrote, “God make us all His Jonathans. There is a great hunter abroad in the world. Like Saul who sought David every day, he seeks souls every day; never a day’s respite, always the hunt is on. Although the words stand forever, “but God delivered him not into his hand,” yet sometimes souls tire of being hunted, and like David they are in a wilderness in a wood. Then is Jonathan’s chance. But notice what he does; he does not so comfort David that he becomes necessary to him. “He strengthened his hand in God.” He leaves his friend strong in God, resting in God, safe in God. He detaches his dear David from himself and he attaches him to his “Very Present Help.”

This is a great description of a healthy relationship. No unhealthy co-dependency here! Jonathan points David towards God. Jonathan no doubt continued to pray for David once he went home.

My friends and church family have surrounded me during this discovery of poor health. They have provided me with prayer, assurances that I may contact them at any time for any reason. They have included Bob in their prayers, concerns and best wishes. The strength they have given us has been amazing and humbling.

Below are a few of the Bible verses I am using to remember that there is no plan set in stone yet. The March results will determine what is next. The doctor visit and consultation will determine who I decide to go to with these developments.

Hebrews 3:1 reminds me to FIX my eyes and my thoughts on Jesus.

Ephesians 6:11-18 is adamant about putting on the whole armor that God has given me. I am to be tenacious about praying in the Spirit.

I first learned this verse many years ago when I was given a melody with it.

We are troubled on every side, yet not distressed; we are perplexed, but not in despair; Persecuted, but not forsaken; cast down, but not destroyed. 2 Corinthians 4:8-9 KJV

If you have read this blog for very long you know I often write about Romans 12:1-2. By His mercies, I am to present myself a living sacrifice before God. By His MERCIES I am deemed a holy and acceptable living sacrifice to Him. He will transform me by the renewing of my mind. I will be enabled to discern what is the will of God, good and acceptable and perfect will.

Romans 11:33 comes up occasionally in song and I am usually sent scrambling for the reference. O the depth of the riches and wisdom and knowledge of God! How unsearchable are his judgements and how inscrutable his ways! Riches and wisdom and knowledge of God. He is not ruffled by this news.

Romans 11:36 For from him and through him and to him are all things. To him be the glory for ever. Amen. My life, to, is from Him and through Him and to Him! As teh saying goes, “He’s got this!”

Even with all this encouragement there are times I am fearful of the future and uncertain where all this is going. I am told in Hebrews 4:16 to go to my Father BOLDLY.

Let us therefore approach the throne of grace with boldness, so that we may receive mercy and find grace to help in time of need.

Frequently Isaiah 35:15a comes to me:

For thus said the Lord God, the Holy One of Israel:
In returning and rest you shall be saved;
    in quietness and in trust shall be your strength.

No, I am not to race about in panic over this. “Returning and rest; quietness and trust.” Sitting with this verse I was fine until I stumbled again over that word trust. As I thought it through though, why not trust God even in this situation? Who else should I go to? There is an old Vineyard song that asks the question “To Whom shall we go?” It is based on the a Scripture verse. Wish I could find that song!! It might even be in this house on an old CD!

Then Isaiah 26:3 came to me: You will keep in perfect peace
    those whose minds are set on You, because they trust in You.

Yes, I need to set my mind there, with the Lord. Leave my mind there, no wandering around. My heart is His. I truly believe that. So rest, stay quiet like the admiration for Sarah in 1 Peter 3: 3-4, “Your beauty should not come from outward adornment, such as elaborate hairstyles and the wearing of gold jewelry or fine clothes. Rather, it should be that of your inner self, the unfading beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is of great worth in God’s sight.

By the way, I got my hair cut 6 inches in case I need surgery. I was going to cut it anyway as it has been getting tangled at night. Severely dilated aorta, possible wall motion abnormalities, some aortic regurgitation. Possible previous MI. Sort of makes me want to puke. I will trust instead, at least for this five minutes!

Psalm 27

Is there a Psalm that claims your heart above others? I first took this Psalm to heart in about 1967. I had by then joined the Episcopal church. There are many lines that I could eventually relate to. Coming to know the Lord as my light, a light upon my path was wonderful. As you likely know the teenage years are tumultuous. This Psalm helped anchor me. Plus my family was headed for shipwreck, though early in the year we did not realize that.

The Lord is my light and my salvation—
    whom shall I fear?
The Lord is the stronghold of my life—
    of whom shall I be afraid?

When the wicked advance against me
    to devour me,
it is my enemies and my foes
    who will stumble and fall.
Though an army besiege me,
    my heart will not fear;
though war break out against me,
    even then I will be confident.

One thing I ask from the Lord,
    this only do I seek:
that I may dwell in the house of the Lord
    all the days of my life,
to gaze on the beauty of the Lord
    and to seek him in his temple.
For in the day of trouble
    he will keep me safe in his dwelling;
he will hide me in the shelter of his sacred tent
    and set me high upon a rock.

Then my head will be exalted
    above the enemies who surround me;
at his sacred tent I will sacrifice with shouts of joy;
    I will sing and make music to the Lord.

Hear my voice when I call, Lord;
    be merciful to me and answer me.
My heart says of you, “Seek his face!”
    Your face, Lord, I will seek.
Do not hide your face from me,
    do not turn your servant away in anger;
    you have been my helper.
Do not reject me or forsake me,
    God my Savior.
10 Though my father and mother forsake me,
    the Lord will receive me.

11 Teach me your way, Lord;
    lead me in a straight path
    because of my oppressors.
12 Do not turn me over to the desire of my foes,
    for false witnesses rise up against me,
    spouting malicious accusations.

13 I remain confident of this:
    I will see the goodness of the Lord
    in the land of the living.
14 Wait for the Lord;
    be strong and take heart
    and wait for the Lord.

Salvation is being preserved from danger, loss or harm. There are so many themes and images in this Psalm. Whew! How to narrow it down to my story. My father had died about 6 years earlier. My mother had remarried. My sister and I had no memory of this man from earlier in our life. He had values very different from the ones we had been raised with thus far. Within a few years my sister was in deep trouble. I sought counseling at Family Services because I was clueless how to negotiate the troubles. Eventually the family had a blow up. I ended up in Juvenile Court where the counselor and the judge decided what to do with me. My mother and step-father concocted a story about my sister and me beating our mom and trying to steal her car to run away. It was ridiculous. My mother had a condition called Purpura. If anyone squeezed her arm too hard she would bruise. They presented the court with photos of her arms. We had never laid a hand upon her. Ever. I was literally caught in the mess. The judge decided against my parents and I was made a ward of the court for the few months remaining until I turned 18. The counselor told me I won. It did not feel like winning.

Yes, my mother and stepfather did forsake me. I went to live with the family of a friend until my classes at the University of Cincinnati began. My tuition, room and board had already been paid for the first year. When I eventually moved to the university housing, I left the church but took Jesus with me. I could not reconcile the experience I was living with what seemed like the hunky-dory life for the parishioners. It was many years before I realized that each of us is broken. Some just hide it better than others.

Now, 58 years later, I understand the Psalm and broken people better than I did at that young age. I also know that the Lord took me to His heart when my parents forsook me. We have remained close ever since. Cling to the LORD in all situations!

Trying to Get You to Relate

Brother Lawrence wrote letters about his relationship with God. Not just church knowledge, not just prayer at set hours, but talking with the Living God as he went about his daily tasks. Do we do that?

Quoting Brennan Manning, Tyler Stanton in Praying Like Monks, Living Like Fools wrote, Manning was an accomplished spiritual guide. Alone and undistracted, though, he was confronted by the gap between spiritual theory and actual experience. “The great divorce between my head and my heart had endured throughout my ministry. For eighteen years I proclaimed the good news of God’s passionate, unconditional love – utterly convinced in my head but not feeling it in my heart. I never felt loved.”Stanton goes on to tell the story of how Manning, ‘stripped of all distraction, activity, and busyness, on a mountain with nothing to dress himself up with – that’s where he knew the love of God.”

Have you experienced that love? Do you walk with Him and talk with Him? Have you heard Him tell you that you are His own? You are a loved child, adopted into God’s family through the blood of Jesus – His sacrifice and offering of the gift of the Holy Spirit to your very self.

Stanton quotes Dane Ortlund as writing “He knows us to the uttermost, and He saves us to the uttermost, because His heart is drawn out to us to the uttermost.” In other words, no matter how deep the sin we have participated in, no matter how dark our loneliest place is, God is there loving us.

Eastern Orthodox Bishop Kallistos Ware wrote, “Christianity is not merely a philosophical theory or a moral code, but involves a direct sharing in divine life and glory, a transforming union with God “face to face.”

May this season of Christmas bring you closer than ever before to the Living Christ in your day-to-day life. A Franciscan priest, a 17th century French monk, an Eastern Orthodox Bishop, a contemporary Christian writer who helped begin an international prayer movement and a little old lady writing a blog in Ohio all are saying the same thing. If they are not wrong then what is holding you back from this intimate relationship with God?

As my mother taught me to sing, try this out for yourself.

His divine power has given us everything needed for life and godliness, through the knowledge of him who called us by his own glory and goodness. Thus he has given us, through these things, his precious and very great promises, so that through them you may escape from the corruption that is in the world because of lust, and may become participants in the divine nature. 2 Peter 1:3-4 NRSV

“A transforming union with God, face-to-face.” Reach for it. Ask for it. Rest in it. I told God years ago that if the teachings of the New Testament and the promises were not for this century then I would quit seeking them. He is still teaching me how accessible those teachings and promises are for today.

Banana

If I do not keep a steady glucose reading through the night, the Continuous Glucose Monitor wakes us up with an alarm if my glucose drops too low. Doc says low glucose is more detrimental than high glucose if not addressed.

Did I tell you I have found an 85% successful method to keep my glucose steady through the night? I eat an under-ripe banana, smeared with reconstituted powdered peanut butter. On occasion I even top it with Breyer’s frozen dessert which has very low carbs. The photo below sort of describes how I am feeling after many months of doing this!

My bananas look beat up like her head after being the fridge!

When I have no appetite I tell myself this is just part of my medication routine. Eat the banana and be glad. So with the Minions I cry, “BANANA!!”

Thank you, Lord, for under ripe bananas to treat this disease. It sure beats another needle!

Food for Thought

My humanity is bound up in yours, for we can only be human together. Desmond Tutu

Isn’t that an interesting thought? Along with there is no we and them, just all human beings.

I pray you have calm and merry holiday preparations. Stay in touch with the humanity of others! Celebrate the coming of Christ both as a child and His return in glory!

“As I open my front door, remind me that I follow in the footsteps of others who have kept their eyes fixed on you.” From a Walk in My Neighborhood, Every Moment Holy Volume 3 Oh Lord, help me, help me keep my eyes fixed on You!

Rumi wrote, “There a thousand ways to kiss the earth.” How do you bow before the Majesty born to us? So many this to give thanks and praise for.

I cannot hear this song too often. I first heard it on a Christmas CD that Christ Tomlin recorded a few years ago. This year my heart just sings it again and again. No, I have not mastered the lyrics, but I made certain to find a recording that supplied them for you. Enjoy as you worship!

Written by Chris Tomlin, Jonas Myrin, Matthew James Redman

Even the Smallest Blessings – Might not have posted?

I wrote this last week. It never showed up for Bob. Few seemed to see it, so I am posting it again! No clue what happened.

We can learn to rejoice in even the smallest blessings our life holds. It is easy to miss our own good fortune; often happiness comes in ways we don’t even notice.

PEMA CHÖDRÖN

I recently shared a recipe with a friend for making Thanksgiving dressing. I learned from my sister’s mother-in-law that if you shape it into balls and bake it is much tastier than if you stuff it in the turkey. Stuffed dressing always seems soggy to me! My friend made and served dressing balls at her Thanksgiving feast and they were a hit. We love them, too!

DRESSING BALLS 1 bag=4c, 2 bags=8c Makes 20 balls
Saute 1/2 cup margarine 1 cup chopped celery
1 small onion diced
Add 4 Tablespoons dry, chopped parsley 1 teaspoon salt
1/4 teaspoon pepper 1-1/2 teaspoon sage
1 teaspoon thyme 1 cup chicken or turkey broth

Put 2-14 oz. bags of dry bread cubes in very large bowl.
Pour hot spice mixture over cubes and begin to stir. Gradually add 3 more cups of broth until you can form bread cubes into baseball sized servings.

Spray oven-proof glass pan with oil. Form and place balls in pan. Pour some broth over for heating. Cover with foil. Refrigerate. When ready to serve, heat 10 minutes covered and 5-10 minutes uncovered at 325°.

After my mother died suddenly in 1975, I was furious when I realized just how many of her recipes she never wrote down. It took me years to try to find recipes similar to what she made. I made it my practice to write my recipes out so my kids could have them when I was gone. When we got our first computer I put the recipes into the computer and printed out copies for me, and my children. To this day I continue this practice.Oil the pans. About 2 hours before baking, cut off amount needed and return rest to fridge. Shape while cold. Cover and let rise on counter  1-1/2 to 2 hours. Brush with melted butter.

I learned to make yeast rolls that can be refrigerated until you are ready to use the dough (several days). Then you shape the rolls or coffee cake and let the dough rise before baking. Makes those holiday meals less hectic and they are SO tasty. Beats every store bought roll we have ever had. Eventually the arthritis in my hands said NO! to forming that cold dough. Caused me a lot of pain. First Emily took over the rolls, then eventually my husband took it over when Emily left home. He realized that I had not written out the step where you let the dough rise on the counter. Oops. I just assumed. This year he realized I did not write out, grease the pans. Another oops.

The other day Emily (daughter) called and said she had given her recipe to a friend, but forgot to copy the backside of the recipe card. How to shape and bake them. (LOL) I updated the recipe saying to GREASE THE PANS and sent her a copy.

What touched me with a small gratitude was that she not only liked my recipe, but shared it with a friend. That might seem small to others, but to me it was huge! “Even the smallest blessings.”

Have you been keeping up with a gratitude list? Perhaps you can make this a week of noting even the smallest things?

The hard frost we have had for several nights has finally killed off the nasturtium vines that are trailing all over the garden. Did not have the heart to pull them earlier as they were blooming right up to the end. I was pondering when it might warm up enough to get those vines into the trash. Then I realized I could simply remove them from the porch and let them disintegrate in the flower bed! Genius tiny blessing. If I wait until it warms up those vines will be soggy and ugh!

Elephant Ears beginning to succumb to wintry weather. They are now totally dead.

One more small blessing. Bob was telling friends about me making dressing balls. It was a small gathering of people who knew each other well. Suddenly the 82 year old at the table asked, “I just have one question. Would someone tell me what turkey balls are?” The table went quiet. Eventually one guy began to giggle. Then the table erupted in laughter. Oh my. The woman placed her hands over her mouth and turned red as she realized what she had said. My sister’s mother-in-law likely would not have approved, but they found it hilarious and could not stop laughing. Bob explained I would shape the dressing into balls to serve with the turkey.

Keep looking for treasures, even tiny ones, for your gratitude list!

He is Exalted

Woke up with this song running through my heart. Of course, then I had to find it so I could sing all of it. It is never a waste of time to praise the LORD! I believe she wrote this in 1986, so yes it came from memory bank somewhere! The hymn is now in many hymnals.

Exalted is elevated in rank, character or status, lofty sublime, noble.

He is above us, beyond us, yet within us! Have you yielded to exaltation of the LORD God Almighty?

ACTS 2:33 NIV  Exalted to the right hand of God, he has received from the Father the promised Holy Spirit and has poured out what you now see and hear.

ISA 25:1 NIV Lord, you are my God;
    I will exalt you and praise your name,
for in perfect faithfulness
    you have done wonderful things,
    things planned long ago.

PS 57:5, 108:5 NIV Be exalted, O God, above the heavens;
    let your glory be over all the earth.

PS 46″10 NIV He says, “Be still, and know that I am God;
    I will be exalted among the nations,
    I will be exalted in the earth.”