Inside Out

We have had a terrible cold going through our household. It is complete with all the nasty symptoms you never want to have from nose to throat to chest to headache to chills, no fever,etc. I find these times especially challenging. I do not know how to keep my primary focus upon God under these circumstances. I had one religious wise guy once ask “What are you doing under the circumstances?” Another groan for Christianity.

Never one, usually 5-6 tissues!

At the end of his life Saint Francis is quoted as saying, “I wish I had been more kind to Brother Ass.” That was his name for his own body.

I was reminded this morning of a poem I wrote in 1988. It is as follows Inside Out ©Molly Lin Dutina 1988

I want to live from the inside out,
Always within the center-down silence.
Having to struggle to get back to within
Is not the direction I choose.

Teach me, Lord, and help to know
how to grow from the peaceful
Sanctuary within.

Show me please where I can go
to refresh our love.
Give me attitudes
that will unravel me
from the sin which
so easily entangles.

Make me one with You, Lord,
so I will know how to be close
to all that is around me.

Help me, Father
and be glorified in my life.






So I suppose part of the answer is that Jesus differs so much from me because my body can still be subject to sickness? I do not have an explanation for why humans are so mightily distracted by illness in the physical body. If anyone figures this out, please let me know!

Until then I still long to live from the inside out, in contrast to coughing my blowing my insides out! Stay well, y’all!

O come, O come

Come and rejoice in the birth of God’s son, our brother and Savior! Wikipedia says, “O Come, O Come Emmanuel is a Christian hymn for Advent, which is also often published in books of Christmas carols. The 1851 translation by John Mason Neale from Hymns Ancient and Modern is the most prominent by far in the English-speaking world, but other translations also exist. ”

Few if any of us use hymnals these days. Few if any hold to not singing Christmas carols during Advent. (One radio station in Cincinnati begins Christmas music on November 1st!) Well, Advent is officially over and the Christmas season in the liturgical calendar is here!

If you are wondering about Immanuel and Emmanuel, Immanuel is the English transliteration from the Hebrew and Emmanuel is the English transliteration from the Greek. I just know Him as God with us, day in and day out to my delight and comfort!

1  O come, O come, Immanuel,
and ransom captive Israel
that mourns in lonely exile here
until the Son of God appear.

Refrain:
Rejoice! Rejoice! Immanuel
shall come to you, O Israel.

2 O come, O Wisdom from on high,
who ordered all things mightily;
to us the path of knowledge show
and teach us in its ways to go. Refrain

3 O come, O come, great Lord of might,
who to your tribes on Sinai's height
in ancient times did give the law
in cloud and majesty and awe. Refrain

Have you invited Immanuel into your life and heart? I cannot get enough of this hymn this year.

A Book Returned

I loaned someone a book about 25 years ago. I lost track of where it went. (I maybe should write down who I loan to?) I usually put a sticker int he front of my books that reads: “Please return to Molly Dutina. She will eventually notice I am missing from her bookshelf, but she won’t have a clue who has me! (My phone number and then) no matter how long I’ve been gone.” She returned it recently. I do not know if she read it, hated or enjoyed it, no feedback. When I read books I own I usually mark a page number in the front cover with a few words that struck me at the time of reading. Here are a few of my notes inside my copy of God’s Joyful Surprise by Sue Monk Kidd, published 1987.

Page 67 “How strange that we tend to stand ankle-deep in the spiritual life even though the grounding depth of intimacy with God is the most nourishing experience of our lives and affirms our very being!

Do you remember the Scripture about the depth of the water in Ezekiel 47, where the water was ankle deep, knee deep, waist deep and then swimming only deep? How strange we stand just ankle deep when the entire river is given to us.

Just the paragraph prior to the above quote Kidd wrote: “Though I wanted the safe, familiar world of before, I also wanted to follow the challenge of dwelling deep in God . . .in prayer . . in His presence. I could not choose; I could only sit on the fence with a foot in each pasture.”

She devotes the remainder of the book to how she found disciplines to help her explore and remain in that place of deep waters. So whereabouts are you? On the fence, ankle deep , or diving deep into the challenge of dwelling deep in God?

Is 2025 the year you finally dive into the river of God’s presence and learn to swim with Him? This book is a wonderful place to begin.

On page 208 she talks about the difference between ‘saying’ our prayers and the change of consciousness that helps us become prayer. “As we grow in the spiritual life, we come to think of Him as deep within us, in our thoughts, moods, feelings, aspirations. God flows inside us. He is our center. As we come to perceive God in this more intimate way, we are filled with a growing sensitivity to Him. We cannot separate ourselves from Him. “ Today this referred to as non-dualism.

Page 206 of my copy, which is 248 pages before the notes, she not only quotes Brother Lawrence, Paul on pray without ceasing, Jesus, and Augustine, but she dispels the notion that prayer without ceasing in not only for ‘super-Christians’ but for every Christian. “Ordinary people. Contrary people. People who dress children for nursery school, rush to work, stare at televisions, forget dentist appointments. People like us. Praying an unbroken prayer in not something to struggle and perspire over. It springs up inside us and becomes a way of life, as natural as breathing.”

She notes we are to prayer simultaneously with our daily activities, keep our mind in God, an attitude and attentiveness that permeates our lives. Our neighbors seem to rejoice in any opportunity to set off fireworks. It terrifies poor Lucky. I am hoping that this New Year when you hear or see fireworks you will be inspired to make 2025 the year when this desire is ignited within you.

Trying to Get You to Relate

Brother Lawrence wrote letters about his relationship with God. Not just church knowledge, not just prayer at set hours, but talking with the Living God as he went about his daily tasks. Do we do that?

Quoting Brennan Manning, Tyler Stanton in Praying Like Monks, Living Like Fools wrote, Manning was an accomplished spiritual guide. Alone and undistracted, though, he was confronted by the gap between spiritual theory and actual experience. “The great divorce between my head and my heart had endured throughout my ministry. For eighteen years I proclaimed the good news of God’s passionate, unconditional love – utterly convinced in my head but not feeling it in my heart. I never felt loved.”Stanton goes on to tell the story of how Manning, ‘stripped of all distraction, activity, and busyness, on a mountain with nothing to dress himself up with – that’s where he knew the love of God.”

Have you experienced that love? Do you walk with Him and talk with Him? Have you heard Him tell you that you are His own? You are a loved child, adopted into God’s family through the blood of Jesus – His sacrifice and offering of the gift of the Holy Spirit to your very self.

Stanton quotes Dane Ortlund as writing “He knows us to the uttermost, and He saves us to the uttermost, because His heart is drawn out to us to the uttermost.” In other words, no matter how deep the sin we have participated in, no matter how dark our loneliest place is, God is there loving us.

Eastern Orthodox Bishop Kallistos Ware wrote, “Christianity is not merely a philosophical theory or a moral code, but involves a direct sharing in divine life and glory, a transforming union with God “face to face.”

May this season of Christmas bring you closer than ever before to the Living Christ in your day-to-day life. A Franciscan priest, a 17th century French monk, an Eastern Orthodox Bishop, a contemporary Christian writer who helped begin an international prayer movement and a little old lady writing a blog in Ohio all are saying the same thing. If they are not wrong then what is holding you back from this intimate relationship with God?

As my mother taught me to sing, try this out for yourself.

His divine power has given us everything needed for life and godliness, through the knowledge of him who called us by his own glory and goodness. Thus he has given us, through these things, his precious and very great promises, so that through them you may escape from the corruption that is in the world because of lust, and may become participants in the divine nature. 2 Peter 1:3-4 NRSV

“A transforming union with God, face-to-face.” Reach for it. Ask for it. Rest in it. I told God years ago that if the teachings of the New Testament and the promises were not for this century then I would quit seeking them. He is still teaching me how accessible those teachings and promises are for today.

Banana

If I do not keep a steady glucose reading through the night, the Continuous Glucose Monitor wakes us up with an alarm if my glucose drops too low. Doc says low glucose is more detrimental than high glucose if not addressed.

Did I tell you I have found an 85% successful method to keep my glucose steady through the night? I eat an under-ripe banana, smeared with reconstituted powdered peanut butter. On occasion I even top it with Breyer’s frozen dessert which has very low carbs. The photo below sort of describes how I am feeling after many months of doing this!

My bananas look beat up like her head after being the fridge!

When I have no appetite I tell myself this is just part of my medication routine. Eat the banana and be glad. So with the Minions I cry, “BANANA!!”

Thank you, Lord, for under ripe bananas to treat this disease. It sure beats another needle!

Isaiah 30:15

Page 832 of the Book of Common Prayer has the prayer #59 For Quiet Confidence.

O God of peace, who hast taught us that in returning and
rest we shall be saved, in quietness and confidence shall be
our strength: By the might of thy Spirit lift us, we pray thee,
to thy presence, where we may be still and know that thou
art
 God; through Jesus Christ our Lord. Amen.

When we visited the National Cathedral I was delighted to find a small plaque on the wall with this very prayer on it. The photo of that plaque hung on my wall for many years.

Many, many years ago I chose Isaiah 30:15 as my ‘life verse.’ It reads:

For thus said the Lord God, the Holy One of Israel:
In returning and rest you shall be saved;
    in quietness and in trust shall be your strength.
But you refused
NRSVUE

I have returned to the prayer and verse countless times over the years. I am always stung by the last phrase, “But you refused” or “But you would not.” Oh Lord deliver me from being one who refuses.

There truly is strength in practicing this verse in your daily life. Here are a few ways. Returning and rest, quietness and trust. That hushes my speculations. Calms my rushing about. (maiden name was Rush!) There are so many applications. Try pondering this prayer and verse for 7 days. See what impact it has upon you! I often print things like this and carry them in my pocket throughout the day.

By the might of Your Spirit, LIFT US WE PRAY, to Your Presence where we maybe still and KNOW that you are God.

by the might of Your Spirit lift us we pray

Food for Thought

My humanity is bound up in yours, for we can only be human together. Desmond Tutu

Isn’t that an interesting thought? Along with there is no we and them, just all human beings.

I pray you have calm and merry holiday preparations. Stay in touch with the humanity of others! Celebrate the coming of Christ both as a child and His return in glory!

“As I open my front door, remind me that I follow in the footsteps of others who have kept their eyes fixed on you.” From a Walk in My Neighborhood, Every Moment Holy Volume 3 Oh Lord, help me, help me keep my eyes fixed on You!

Rumi wrote, “There a thousand ways to kiss the earth.” How do you bow before the Majesty born to us? So many this to give thanks and praise for.

I cannot hear this song too often. I first heard it on a Christmas CD that Christ Tomlin recorded a few years ago. This year my heart just sings it again and again. No, I have not mastered the lyrics, but I made certain to find a recording that supplied them for you. Enjoy as you worship!

Written by Chris Tomlin, Jonas Myrin, Matthew James Redman

Using A Buddhist Bucket In A Christian Well

Once a woman came to our home. When she saw Bob’s copy of “Zen and the Art Of Motorcycle Maintenance” on the shelf she was immediately suspicious. The narrowness of her Christian belief system stunned me. As if Christ cannot handle other ways of thinking? I don’t know. I was just stunned. Good thing she never saw this title on the same bookcase! “Without Buddha I Could Not Be A Christian.”

Below is a talk by the theologian Doctor Paul Knitter given at the Faith and Life lecture series the Baldwin Wallace University located in Berea, Ohio just 12 miles from Cleveland. Paul was ordained in Rome in 1966, married in 1982 and taught undergraduates at the Xavier University for some 30 years.

I heard Paul Knitter speak at an Associates Retreat at the Convent of the Transfiguration. I bought his book. Wish I had put the purchase date in the front. Oh well. I recently pulled it off the shelf again as The Book of Joy reminded me that he is where I learned to use a Buddhist bucket in my Christian well. That refers to learning the power and importance of silence in my journey with the Trinity.

On Page 153 of his book, Dr. Knitter says “We need an additional Sacrament, the Sacrament of Silence. I believe we Christians need to receive this Sacrament regularly and frequently, as frequently as every day. (Fortunately, it’s a self-administered sacrament, so we don’t have to go to church.)

Page 154: To pick up the analogy used earlier in this chapter, Buddhism offers Christians a bucket that can draw up the mystical depths of the Cristian well. It provides a help, for some a decisive help, to realize and enter in the non-dualistic, or unitive, heart of Christian experience – a way to be one with the Father, to live Christ’s life, to be not just a container of the Spirit but an embodiment and expression of the Spirits, to live by and with and in the Spirit, to live and move and have our being in God. So I’m proposing a Buddhist means to a Christian end – Buddhist tools for a Christian project. Without Buddha I Could Not Be A Christian

I am going to stop copying the text now. I want you to give this some thought. I know this may be a lot to take in. I encourage you though to keep reading. Wouldn’t you like to find a means to deepen your ability to fulfill oneness with Christ? When I am in a retail place and they ask, “May I help you ma’am?” I always reply, “I need all the help I can get!” None of the things I have adapted into my prayer life from Buddhism have made me less of a Christ follower. I agree with Knitter, that learning about silence and stillness has made me better at following the Holy Spirit and walking with Christ. How do you accomplish stillness and silence?

The Sovereign Lord has given me a well-instructed tongue,
    to know the word that sustains the weary.
He wakens me morning by morning,
    wakens my ear to listen like one being instructed.
The Sovereign Lord has opened my ears;
    I have not been rebellious,
    I have not turned away.
Isaiah 50:4-5 NIV

I learned years ago I cannot open my own ears. At times I can barely yield myself to listening for the still, small voice of God! But God is my help and strength (Psalm 28). God shows me the way. When the chatter in my head proves daunting, I can choose to go to the Sacrament of Silence. I gently return again and again as often as it takes for 15 minutes. At times, I practice Psalm 131.

My heart is not proud, Lord,
    my eyes are not haughty;
I do not concern myself with great matters
    or things too wonderful for me.
But I have calmed and quietened myself,
    I am like a weaned child with its mother;
    like a weaned child I am content.

He says, “Be still, and know that I am God;
    I will be exalted among the nations,
    I will be exalted in the earth.”
Psalm 46:10

A Fire, Too busy and Gratitude

Everyday after lunch, we close the front door and take a rest. This one day I looked out the window of the front door only to see flames and smoke. A neighbor’s house was burning. I took my coat and ran to the area.

24-12-13 Devastation© Molly Lin Dutina
Ever stood in a meadow
And looked into a dark woods
With the trunks so close the light barely gets through?

Our front door window looks out onto our neighborhood,
Houses similar, vinyl siding colors differ
We are glad our main windows look into
an older more interesting neighborhood
Like most American houses
Our roofing is framed on wooden trusses.

There was a fire yesterday
As I closed the front door and looked out the front door window
I saw flames and smoke
Big nasty flames of red and orange, devouring that roof
as thick smoke billowed into the sky
A still point of unbelief

Thank God no people were at home
Now the view out our front door is the
Dark black framing charred wood -
What remains of our neighbor’s roof

As I stood in a neighbor’s
driveway and watched the burning house
Waiting for one neighbor to return home
Firemen and firewomen calmly doing their work,
occasionally asking me if I had a key to this house or knew how to get in
Horror finally erupted for me as some of the roof timbers fell
Siding on houses both south and north melting

It had been an unreal scene until then
The dog inside did not survive the smoke inhalation
The fire workers were able to save some of the woman’s possessions,
especially the things her husband had made for her before he died.
Cause of the fire is still to be determined.

We are more grateful than usual having witnessed this destruction
Now the view out our front window is blackened trusses
Like original close grown trees
Occasional sun shows through
No longer a shelter



I have been too busy for my own good. The crochet group party and decorations are finished.

Actually there were 3 battery candles in all four arrangements

Then we volunteered to collect the gifts our church donated to Interparish Ministry for families to choose from for Christmas. I emptied the Rav4 of every single thing to make room for the gifts. We took my car and Bob’s Volkswagen Taos to church. We packed both of them to the rafters. Unbelievable the generosity of the church members. Amazed at how much the cars could hold. And there were more gifts to be cataloged and delivered the next day! That was work that filled us with joy. The next day all were delivered to the distribution site safely in the pouring rain. No matter, knowing the joy they will bring.

There has not been time so far this season to make gingerbread with the grandgirls. We decided to do it on a date after our family celebration this weekend. Ouch! That hurts but is understandable with both young ladies working now. Traditions can bring disappointment as well as joy. Oh yeah, change is inevitable! I almost forgot.

So as the final gifts roll in and we wrap a few in paper, (most will be given in cloth bags I sewed throughout the year), I will be baking cookies to go with our favorite ice cream for dessert after gift sharing. Need to purchase the items for the sandwich making. That became a tradition when the Grandkids were all little and not interested in food when gifts are so much more exciting!

Neighbors on both side will have to have siding replaced. One also has 2 broken windows from the heat of the flames. Uncertain what the neighbor who suffered such destruction will do next. The rumor is she was going to move in with her grandson in 2025. That is occurring now. There has not been a fire in this neighborhood before, so the Homeowners Board will have to determine if there are rules about re-building? They are deciding how to make a monetary collection for her to show our sympathy.

Please remember her in your prayers this season. I am certain the Lord will take care of her in her loss. Yes, she lost all of the gifts she had already purchased. But thank God she has her life and her health. No injuries for the fire personnel either.

Impermanence and Death

Remember the ring above worn by Jonathan Roumie? It so fits with this post!

I thought of the quote below recently when I attended a Zoom book discussion of The Book of Joy. I was very late but did not want to miss the group entirely. I could not recall the poem at the time so I looked it up later. I guess the framed version I used to have was edited to the calligrapher’s liking, because I do not remember anything about a cloud of smoke.

Life should not be a journey to the grave with the intention of arriving safely in a pretty and well preserved body, but rather to skid in broadside in a cloud of smoke, thoroughly used up, totally worn out, and loudly proclaiming “Wow! What a Ride!”
― Hunter S. Thompson, The Proud Highway: Saga of a Desperate Southern Gentleman, 1955-1967

Rather I think of it like I will skid into heaven with a mouthful of chocolate, used up … etc. I might even be late arriving!

Our discussion that night was on chapter about the Illness and Fear of Death. Not a topic most of us enjoy. I once heard. “Change is inevitable. Come to accept it.” I do not know a single human who actually likes change, do you? I wrote about this once before here https://wordpress.com/post/treasures-in-plain-sight.org/153

Impermanence can also be a comfort! I am promised a new body after my death. That will be a relief!! Things will not always remain the same and that is great news regarding the things I absolutely cannot stand.

How about you? As you practice holding all things loosely can you rejoice in the impermanence of life? What might you loosen your grip on? What topic plagues you with negative thinking? Perhaps you could remind yourself that it will not ALWAYS be like this!

When my children were growing up, especially when they were in high school I was sorrowful. Many people asked, “Can’t you be excited about who they will become? What their future holds?” What I had a difficult time explaining was that I so enjoyed being a mother and knowing they were about to fledge from our nest made me sorrowful. No, they hardly need a mother these days. I don’t think they will not really miss me until I leave this earth. The impermanence of life hit me hard in those days.

Archbishop Desmond Tutu speaking in the Book of Joy spoke much about death.

“Because God is God, because God is infinite, because none of us who are creatures will ever fathom the infinitude that is God, heaven is going to be forever a place of new discovery.” The author, Douglas Abrams, goes on to say, Perhaps death and the fear of death is truly the greatest challenge to joy. Well, when we are dead, it does not really matter, but it is the of its approaching, of the suffering that often precedes it, and ultimately the fear of the oblivion and the loss of our person hood that frighten us. Many psychologists say the fear of death lies behind all other fears, and many historians of religion argue that religion arose to try to solve the mystery of death. Modern life keeps that fear at bay, as we don’t interact with the very old or the very sick, and illness, frailty, and death get tucked away behind institutional walls from our everyday lives.

Death is part of our life. Fact. I always opine that none of us are getting out of here alive, unless Jesus comes before we die. And even in living, we are exhorted to die to self! The Dalai Lama pointed out that “the Buddha’s last teaching at the time of his death ends with the truth of impermanence, reminding us how it is the nature of all things that come into existence to have an end. The Buddha said nothing lasts.”

“Everything is in a constant state of change – nothing remains static, and nothing remains permanent,” he reminded them. “What is important to remember is that sooner or later death to comes and to make our life meaningful while we’re alive.” Another contributor to the book, Jinpa, mentioned,”The true measure of spiritual development is how one confronts one’s won mortality. The best way is when one is able to approach death with joy; the next best way is without fear; third best way is at least not to have regrets.”

Guess we each have work to do as we review those ways, checking our own heart and moving towards our inevitable end! May this season as winter approaches, find you ready to perform some of that important self examination. Blessing, Molly D.

There is no fear in love. But perfect love drives out fear, because fear has to do with punishment. The one who fears is not made perfect in love. 1 John 4:18 NIV

So do not fear, for I am with you;
    do not be dismayed, for I am your God.
I will strengthen you and help you;
    I will uphold you with my righteous right hand.
Isaiah 41:10 NIV