Ouch. This date and June 14th both bring me pangs of anguish. My Dad died on November 14, 1961. My mom died June 14, 1975. If my Dad was alive today he would be 109 years old. I do not wish that on anyone. That said, I have a friend who is in her 90s. Should she die this week I must say I would miss her dearly.
I never knew Paul Arthur Rush as anyone other than Daddy. I had just turned eleven years old when he died in our apartment. I was angry with him that morning when I left for school, (no idea over what now). I do remember that I refused to kiss him good bye. Little did I know he would be dead before I returned to the house from my after school dental appointment. My mother was supposed to pick me up. During my appointment I cried out. The dentist had to stop and let me calm down. I think that was just about the moment my Dad died. What a mess.
When the dental office secretary unexpectedly drove me home (due to the chaos in our house), I entered a place where my life was changed forever. Why am I telling you all of this?
We do not know what the next hour of our life will bring to us or to those whom we love. John Wesley is credited with the quote below, but it is cited from the 1790s to the 1900s in various publications as being written by various people. I think we can all agree it sums up wisdom indeed.
Do all the good you can, By all the means you can, In all the ways you can, In all the places you can, At all the times you can, To all the people you can, As long as ever you can.
On the morning of November 14, 1961 I had no idea how much that saying would impact me later in life. Yes, I wish I had kissed my Dad good-bye that morning. He suffered many years from repeated heart attacks and his heart disease is what finally killed him. For many years I was sorry for my inaction when I departed for school. I know I am forgiven.
I am grateful to my Dad in so many ways. They say he had a great sense of humor. I suppose that is where I got mine? I remember setting his hair in pin curls. For years I had totally straight hair. In my older age it is growing in wavy. His was wavy and I always envied that! After he died I would walk in a room and relatives would gasp and say, “Oh! It is Paul Rush.” So I guess I look more like him than I do my mom.
When I was diagnosed with diabetes I asked how that could be? “There is no history of that in my family.” The doctor told me that when my dad died from heart disease he likely was diabetic. There was no standard testing for diabetes at the time. His heart disease was likely due to his diabetes. (Not to mention the smoking, and drinking, etc.)
I will tell you that losing him set me on a quest to replace him. I found that no one could. However, that was the time when I did turn my heart and soul to the Lord God Almighty. I have found Him to be a most faithful Father Who will never leave me or forsake me.
So never miss a chance to tell someone that you love them. Seek most of all to know the heavenly Father.
My heart says of you, “Seek his face!” Your face, Lord, I will seek. 9 Do not hide your face from me, do not turn your servant away in anger; you have been my helper. Do not reject me or forsake me, God my Savior. 10 Though my father and mother forsake me, the Lord will receive me. 11 Teach me your way, Lord; lead me in a straight path because of my oppressors. 12 Do not turn me over to the desire of my foes, for false witnesses rise up against me, spouting malicious accusations.
13 I remain confident of this: I will see the goodness of the Lord in the land of the living. 14 Wait for the Lord; be strong and take heart and wait for the Lord. Psalm 27:8-14 NIV
My Uncle made me pose the morning of Daddy’s funeral. I did not want to smile.
Recently the CALM app offered another half price subscription. I decided to take them up on the deal. I had a subscription during Covid and it really helped me. The bedtime stories for adults can be soothing! They offer all sorts of things for adult centering and prayer.
“Calm is a mental health app that helps you manage stress, sleep better, and live a happier life. It offers guided meditations, sleep stories, soundscapes, and more to support your well being. Calm your mind – change your life. Mental health is hard. Getting support doesn’t need to be. Our app puts the tools to feel better in your back pocket, with personalized content to manage stress and anxiety, get better sleep, and feel more present in your life. Relax your mind, and wake up as the person you want to be.”
I find that after this election cycle I need to remain calm in so many areas of my life. I have stopped watching the national news. After the last term of Donald Trump was over, I found I had an almost PTSD type reaction to his voice on the television. I do not want to go back to that cringing response.
The three oldest Dutina siblings asking, “Now what?!?”
There are a few places in Scripture that speak about sleep. I kept sort of remembering a verse and then it would slip my mind. Recently I nailed it down. Psalm 4 is used in Compline. There are only 8 verses in this particular Psalm. I hope you will look it up in your favorite version. The verse to cling to is:
I will both lie down and sleep in peace, for you alone, O Lord, make me lie down in safety. Psalm 4:8RSV
This Scripture is powerful and even better than the Calm app. I can step out of the room if Bob wants to watch the national news and use the Calm app, or read towards the Zoom study/discussion group. I can mark the printed blog pages to pull out things for a booklet. There are many things I can do besides watch the National news, which usually reports about 95% bad news.
Psalm 127:3c says “The Lord gives to His beloved sleep.” Rest in the mighty Trinity, beloved.
As you likely know, I enjoy walking and watching the flora about me as the seasons change. Imagine how startled I was when I came upon this in a neighbor’s yard!
Wood Violet, November 2024
When I moved to the San Francisco bay area in October of 1969 I was amazed at daffodils that bloomed in January and poinsettias that grew up the walls of one house. I walked about shaking my head and declaring, “Wrong! This is just wrong!” I felt that same feeling as I saw this violet not in one yard but in two different yards. The plant life here in Ohio is just confused by these atypical warm temperatures. And the drought! Oh, the drought is awful. The ponds at the Cincinnati Nature Center had the lowest water level I have ever seen in my many years of going there.
Nothing could dampen the enthusiasm of Lucky as she got to make the trek through the Nature Center.
Man and beast in the breeze
We came across the pollinator garden. Last summer I discovered this vine growing there.
And this is how it appears now!
All the lovely flowers gone to seed!
Even the tree along the parking area was lovely!
Oak declaring autumn!
No idea what this plant is but the colors were stunning!
My flower bed at home still has blooming nasturtiums, marigolds, snapdragons, and the red geranium is going strong! So weird. November 5th and the flowers show no signs of slowing down.
Take a walk and find the treasures that are in plain sight where you live!
The revelation of God is whole and pulls our lives together. The signposts of God are clear and point out the right road. The life-maps of God are right, showing the way to joy. The directions of God are plain and easy on the eyes. God’s reputation is twenty-four-carat gold, with a lifetime guarantee. The decisions of God are accurate down to the nth degree. Psalm 19:7-9 The Message
Here is a practical application that I completed from the Book of Joy last weekend. What a change it made for me!
I wrote in my journal that I sensed that weekend was the best of times and the worst of times. Within a few hours I would have birthday prayer at my church. This return to St. Timothy’s has felt SO MUCH like coming home. The joy of having that prayer over me was not something I can yet describe. I suppose it has to do with choosing this denomination when I was 15 and arranging at the time for my baptism and confirmation.
The altar at St. Timothy’s
I was also invited to attend a baby shower for one my best friend’s son and daughter-in-law the same day. Their first child was born during Covid and there was no shower for that child. I was looking forward to seeing Kathy in the element of family and friends whom I had heard so much about. The worst part is that Kathy spends part of each year in Florida instead of across the street from me in Ohio. Her departure flight was the morning after the baby shower. We have grown incredibly close over the couple of years we have known each other. It has to be the Lord who orchestrated this! Both of us love and serve the Trinity. I do that through the Protestant church and she through the Catholic. We are the same age, husbands are the same age. We were married the same year. We both have a daughter and a son. She suffers from a chronic illness that is worse than mine. Boy oh boy can we relate to one another!
So when she leaves Ohio each year it is very hard on both of us. She assured me that this time she would only be gone for 7 weeks, then here for 2 weeks at Christmas, and then would return for a little bit when this baby is born.
I realized I needed to sit with the cascade of feelings that would all occur within about 24 hours and process them. The Dalai Lamai says see sadness and rejoice at the high pleasure of the treasure of her friendship. During my quiet time, I was like a mouse in a maze running all over the place. Not finding a place to process the feelings, much less experience them!
Yes, I need to return to that practice of silence and processing. Perhaps this assignment is too difficult for me? Finished reading Barefoot where the Wesleyan prayer was repeatedly used. Painfully, the women recited, I am glad to give You everything. I am content to have nothing and You – have everything as you see fit Lord, and they also ask God to help them with all of that. I have not arrived. I need Your help as much as they did.
There have been days with showers of leaves falling and delighting us with their journey. This morning as a single leaf fell it seemed more poignant than showers of hundreds at a time.
Perhaps that is the lesson in my blessings and sadness. There are blessings of having all these leaves during the summer, the blessing of watching their colors change. And the drama of watching them fall to the ground. There is the sadness of one leaf letting go of its anchor to the branch and drifting to the earth. They are all one. Will I let my sadness blend with my joys and not unmoor me from my faith, my hope, my love? Not let me plunge into grief?
I need a paper copy of the Book of Joy. I need to study that book, apply the wisdom, take my time with what the Archbishop and the Dalai Lama teach. It is as if my first reading was just a primer and now it’s time to embrace the lessons and not blow past them. Now is the time to truly go deep in my own life with what they hold forth. I’m fairly certain that Monday zoom book group sharing over this book will be a means to convict me. It is up to me to embrace the work for myself.
The next morning I journaled, Dalai Lama And Desmond Tutu say my sadness over her departure reflects the depth of my love. And I do love her, Lord. Such a gift to me from You. I never would have dreamed such a friend! You knew what both of us needed.
The earth has changed its appearance drastically. Leaves are scattered every place outside. Garden ridge is covered, Nasturtiums poke through. More sky, fewer and fewer leaves. More limbs attest to rest coming with the seasonal change.
Back to Barefoot book. Wesley: I am no longer mine own, but Yours. Put me to what You will, rank me with whom You will. Put me to doing, put me to suffering. Let me be employed for You or laid aside for You, Exalted for You, or brought low for You. Let me be full, let me be empty. Let me have all things, let me have nothing. I freely and heartily yield all things to Your pleasure and disposal. And now, O glorious and blessed God, Father, Son and Holy Spirit, You are mine and I am Yours. So be it. And the covenant which I have made on earth, Let it be ratified in heaven. Amen. Back to Barefoot book. Wesley: I am no longer mine own, but Yours.
So Monday morning was completed with peace. Kathy’s family loaded their luggage in our car. We hugged and said our good-byes. I did not cry this time, knowing she remains in my heart as one of my greatest gifts from God. Bob drove them to the airport.
I think studying the wisdom from Archbishop Desmond Tutu and his good friend the Dali Lamai will help me gain a more stable emotional and spiritual life. Equilibrium, peace, stability. Help me, Father to apply wisdom to my heart.
I do love you, my sister, Kathy Peterson. God knew what we both needed and gave us to each other. Praise His holy name!!
And when you pray, do not keep on babbling like pagans, for they think they will be heard because of their many words. 8 Do not be like them, for your Father knows what you need before you ask him. Matthew 6:7-8
My son, if you accept my words and store up my commands within you, 2 turning your ear to wisdom and applying your heart to understanding— 3 indeed, if you call out for insight and cry aloud for understanding, 4 and if you look for it as for silver and search for it as for hidden treasure, 5 then you will understand the fear of the Lord and find the knowledge of God. 6 For the Lord gives wisdom; from his mouth come knowledge and understanding. Proverbs 2:1-6
I read this book of conversations between the Dalai Lama and Archbishop Desmond Tutu several years ago. It was first published in 2016. Recently a friend asked me to join a zoom discussion group about the book. I began reading it again and have had some difficulty keeping up with the reading assignment as I realize that this time around I want to study the book and apply to myself the wisdom these two men offer about life and emotions. For me these are lessons to be studied and practiced, not breezed through. Guess last time I hurried through them? Or perhaps I only took what I could use at the time and left the remainder to be re-discovered this time. Regardless, I have the book in digital kindle form. Now I think I need it in paperback so I can more easily reference the study notes and practices at the back of the book. For the moment I am flipping back and forth between the text and index.
We create most of our suffering, so it should be logical that we also have the ability to create more joy. When it comes to personal happiness there is a lot that we as individuals can do. Dalai Lama & Archbishop Desmond Tutu
“You show your humanity,” the Archbishop began, “by how you see yourself not as apart from others but from your connection to others. .” They both go on to point out that we need to recognize each other as human. The Dali Lama repeatedly mentioned that there are seven (now eight) billion of us on the earth. “We are each human. We are same human beings. No need for introduction. Same human face, when we see one another we immediately know this is a human brother or sister. Whether you know them or not, you can smile and say hello.”
The book is also a study in how we can learn to tame and train our emotional selves toward more health and stability. Both of these men have suffering greatly during this life and perhaps that is what developed in them such a deep well of joy and laughter.
Though an introvert, with strangers I am usually an “outgoing” person. I have embarrassed all of my family members at one time or another by greeting people whom I have never met. I even strike up conversations with many of them. I make it my business to especially compliment young folks as they are so often unaware that they are lovely or have terrific eyes, or whatever strikes me as useful. In the book they point out how we all too often distance ourselves from others unnecessarily.
I think as the election results are announced later this week these lessons about Joy and Life will be especially useful for me. I pray regardless of who you voted for that there will be some comfort from the Lord showing how to live with the views that may differ from your choice for President.
Each of us is human. We create distance between ourselves by not offering grace, forgiveness, mercy and loving kindness to one another. One commentator mentioned the wisdom they teach in this book, such as fear, anger and hatred, exist internally as well as externally. I have noted that politics does not rule the Kingdom of God. We choose whether we will walk in paths of righteousness and peace with one another.
These men offer great wisdom for how we, as a nation, can go forward after all of this hurtful rhetoric and judgement of one another. Maybe this time we humans can learn a higher way, a better way of living and loving?
Please God keep us from violence toward one another. Rigid opinions sometimes promote us to hatred. Help us to conform to the image of Jesus. The Dalai Lama and the late Anglican Archbishop Desmond Tutu both knew paths to peace. Help us to choose the same for America.
And a highway will be there; it will be called the Way of Holiness; it will be for those who walk on that Way. The unclean will not journey on it; wicked fools will not go about on it. 9 No lion will be there, nor any ravenous beast; they will not be found there. But only the redeemed will walk there, 10 and those the Lord has rescued will return. They will enter Zion with singing; everlasting joy will crown their heads. Gladness and joy will overtake them, and sorrow and sighing will flee away. Isaiah 35:8-10 NIV
There are nations in the world where people risk their lives to place their vote. Not so, America. I am always amazed that so few registered. Of the eligible, millions stayed home. What?!? I have never been a statistics person, or even a numbers person, but these numbers leave me flabbergasted, (to be overcome with astonishment).
Please, vote. It is not only your right, but your privilege, too. The election workers in Ohio put in a very long, hard day to sign you in, get you to the right precinct, give you your ballot and make certain it is counted. The least you could do is to actually show up at the polls! Please.
I am delighted that this election cycle is almost at an end. The TV ads are mostly discouraging and I cannot wait for them to end. May God lead us in our selection from among the candidates in every office in every state.
From King David, who invited us to come before God with songs of praise, to the harmonious choirs that fill Catholic churches today, singing is a profound way of connecting with the Divine. “When we sing, we experience God’s presence in a new way,” as Pope St. John Paul II beautifully articulated.
While the exact phrasing, “He who sings prays twice,” is not found in Augustine’s texts, the quote is traditionally said to come from his teachings on love and worship. Augustine indeed recognized the profound connection between singing and a heightened form of prayer, noting that “he who sings praise, not only praises, but also loves Him whom he is singing about/to/for.” https://ucatholic.com/blog/saint-augustine-said-if-you-do-this-its-like-praying-twice/
“So what,” you may ask, adding, “I am not Catholic!” Okay, but do you sing? I did not ask if you sing well, just do you? The Word says to make a joyful noise unto the Lord. Psalm 100:1 KJV
My heart, O God, is steadfast; I will sing and make music with all my soul. 2 Awake, harp and lyre! I will awaken the dawn.0 3 I will praise you, Lord, among the nations; I will sing of you among the peoples. 4 For great is your love, higher than the heavens; your faithfulness reaches to the skies. 5 Be exalted, O God, above the heavens; let your glory be over all the earth. Psalm 108:1-15 NIV
There are times when I am amazed that even if I am in a situation where things are sad and obviously beyond my control, I can lift my voice to the Lord and sing, coming to a place of peace and even joy in the midst of all that.
You might want to try to sing your prayers once and see how it goes.
Peace is letting go – returning to the silence that cannot enter the realm of words because it is too pure to be contained in words. by Malidoma Patrice Some
“The silence that cannot enter the realm of words” … what might I write about that? I have been there. I may return there. You must go to that place for yourself. Enough said.
I pray you will choose right after the time you are reading this to slip into that silence and rest in God’s presence. It will not be a waste of your time!
Our dog, Lucky, loves to shred stuffed toys. She takes her time and usually makes a right mess. Kohl’s has a program where they offer stuffed toys and/or story books for $5 each. Proceeds go to charity. I have found these are safe for Lucky as they do not have hard plastic eyes, etc. On occasion I go purchase a few and put them up in the closet until she is ready for a new one. Recently I disposed of the Cat in the Hat after she had taken the stuffing out of his arms, legs and hat. I replaced it with One Fish. Are you familiar with the Dr. Seuss book, One Fish, Two Fish? Lucky loves to rest in our bedroom every afternoon. No clue as to why? I recently went in the bedroom and there was One Fish, turned over it made Two fish and next to that was …. wait for it.
One fishTwo fishSCHOOL of fish, stuffing all over the rug!
One day after chewing on One Fish for a while she took a nap on top of it!
Our friends, Betty and Dan, live in big sky country. We sometimes get a vaguely similar effect here. Recently when walking Lucky in the morning I was delighted with this sky.
Oh the glory of His Presence!
When I asked Bob to take this photo I called it the last bouquet of the summer. Yet the nasturtiums continue to bloom. I do not have the heart to tear them out of the garden until a very hard freeze. I might have to smash some of them though in order to capture the chipmunk that has taken up residence in our front flower bed for 2 years now, grrr!
I placed them in vase on our kitchen counter. A friend came in and asked where I got those flowers? My delighted answer was, “The garden!”
The person I have been concerned about is getting treatment. Much to the delight of those who love that person, several different modalities are being used to approach healing. Pray they find the best medication with the least side effects to promote healing. The quote below is true of my situation the last couple of weeks.
Admitting grief does not diminish us, it strengthens us and makes us more compassionate.
TREBBE JOHNSON
I am doing much better with my own mental health after prayer, listening to an Old Testament story in several versions and taking notes on it. Seeing how this story is also direction from the Father as to how I can move forward. Talking with a compassionate friend has also helped. This has not been an easy 2 weeks, but there is light at the end of the tunnel and it is not a freight train!
May you have the courage to admit your own grief. May you find the strength in that admission. May you be willing to do the work necessary to create a deeper compassion within you.
Treasures in Plain Sight, A Christian Blog 