Our brokenness is also the source of our common humanity, the basis for our shared search for comfort, meaning, and healing. Our shared vulnerability and imperfection nurtures and sustains our capacity for compassion.
I was involved in the ministry many years ago. I recently had a Stephen minster of my own and am now ready to serve again in that capacity. I look forward to the multiple books and online training I will be doing. It is always good to give back to any program that has helped or encouraged you. I pray you will do the same!
Bear one another’s burdens, and in this way you will fulfill the law of Christ (Galatians 6:2 NRSV)
There truly is a wealth of information on their website. Please explore it at your leisure and see if this is something that you or your congregation could benefit from!
We are all broken. Some of us just hide it better than others. Care and compassion can heal so much.
Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit. Rather, in humility value others above yourselves, 4 not looking to your own interests but each of you to the interests of the others. Philippians 2:3-4 NIV
Turned the corner on the big 75. Bob is taking great delight in saying things such as, “I have never kissed a woman this old before.” Smart aleck, he is two years old than I am!
It has been a grand celebration of turning 3/4 of a century. Whew! There have been flowers and cake, gifts and greetings galore. We modified my favorite coconut cake because with Type 2 diabetes it was just not good for me. (But the old recipe was so yummy!) This year I bought a Pillsbury sugar free chocolate cake. I asked Bob to add coconut to the batter. He then topped it with cool whip mixed with coconut. Oh it is yummy and I do not have a terrible spike in my blood sugar after eating it!
So yes, when I took the photo I also had eat a forkful, or two!
Every year and most holidays Bob makes me a card using one of his photos. This photo is a mural on a wall in downtown Cincinnati. I was so excited by the mural I could not wait to show it to him. He took the photo shortly after his knee replacement surgery. The little girl obviously has an imaginary friend with her in the mud puddle. He reminds me of the book series I read with the children about Little Bear.
I named it “Birthday Dance!”
I have been unable to find who designed this mural, but I just love the imagination involved!
Since our birthdays are three weeks apart we literally celebrate by finishing one and beginning another. Here we have his cake and card. THE favorite birthday cake for Bob.
His beloved carrot cake. I finally obtained currants this year instead of raisins.
When I saw this card at Target there was NO hesitation to purchase it.
Notice the she snow-person is missing her nose! Talk about sacrifice!!
He SO deserved this card. We decided it might be the best card of the decade! Each year I debate baking two of his cakes. He gives away most of it and is sad when that last sliver hits his plate. Happy birthday to each of you readers in what ever way you celebrate! Have joyous year!
Our priest recently challenged us to make plans for our funeral including any music that we want the gathering to sing. I was reminded of a compline hymn that captured my heart when the Sisters used to have sung compline. I realized over several retreats that the hymn had multiple verses in various places in the hymnal. I began to collect those verse to use during my own compline prayer time at home. Suddenly I could not longer remember the melody.
I am not very good at sight reading music. I asked Sister Corinna to play the melody for me. She suggested we use the piano at St. Mary’s retreat center where I was staying. Later that evening I found it on YouTube!
The melody was written by Thomas Tallis who lived in the 1500s. It is called the Eighth tune for Compline. The video plays the song in the midst of the Compline service. Below are the lyrics.
1 All praise to thee, my God, this night, for all the blessings of the light: keep me, O keep me, King of kings, beneath thine own almighty wings.
2 Forgive me, Lord, for thy dear Son, the ill that I this day have done; that with the world, myself, and thee, I, ere I sleep, at peace may be.
3 O may my soul on thee repose, and with sweet sleep mine eyelids close; sleep that shall me more vigorous make to serve my God when I awake.
4 Praise God, from whom all blessings flow; praise him, all creatures here below; praise him above, ye heavenly host: praise Father, Son, and Holy Ghost.
As I mentioned yesterday in this blog “When I went to the Associates retreat over a week ago I was watching for my full stop. I consider the retreat a success when I finally put everything aside and come to a full stop before the Lord.” The ‘Providence of God’ is defined as the purposeful sovereignty of God. Sovereignty is the royal rank, authority, power.
My full stop came at an unusual time for me. I had decided to honor my need for rest, even if that need interfered with a scheduled convent prayer service or even the Eucharist. Saturday late morning I decided to lay down for a nap. I was looking out my window in the retreat house. The leaves on the tree were blowing, but not yet falling. I was reminded of Brother Lawrence.
Brother Lawrence is reported to have said: “That in the winter, seeing a tree stripped of its leaves, and considering that within a little time, the leaves would be renewed, and after that the flowers and fruit appear, he received a high view of the Providence and Power of GOD, which has never since been effaced from his soul. That this view had perfectly set him loose from the world, and kindled in him such a love for GOD, that he could not tell whether it had increased in above forty years that he had lived since.”
And then I realized:
Seeing this tree in autumn, knowing the changes it will endure as leaves fall and then are renewed, and after that the flower and fruit will appear, I see a high view of the Providence of God, which shall not be effaced from my soul. This view sets me free from the world, and kindles in me such love for God, that I can not tell whether it has decreased since my childhood times fifty years ago in Robison Park with God.
Yes, my full stop. I then went peacefully to sleep.
God is able to grow these trees, to keep these trees through drought and storms, wind and hail, all of the seasons and even the insults of mankind. God is able to keep me, also, regardless of what comes my way. There have been so many events in 2025 that have been difficult and/or upsetting, yet I have been kept through all of them. There is such a love for God kindled in my soul. I am in awe.
Sit for a minute and reflect upon your year thus far. Remind yourself of all the many ways you have been kept. Be grateful and in awe.
When I went to the Associates retreat a over a week ago I was watching for my full stop. I consider the retreat a success when I finally put everything aside and come to a full stop before the Lord.
The material presented was not what I was expecting. Therefore, I was a little out of step.
The first day I was at the retreat house alone and totally enjoyed the deep silence. I provided my own meals and just got as quiet as I could, dropping cares and concerns as each hour slid past. I did some journaling, crochet, reading and just lots of rest.
Instead of the presentation being about centering prayer the couple, Peter and Nicole, presented us with ways to stay grounded even amidst our own worries, challenges and concerns. They even went so far as to ask us our concerns and then address those during the retreat! I found that both refreshing and kind.
The main words of emphasis were first, Awe or wonder, like Moses seeing the burning bush that did not burn up.
Awe, on the other hand, is the sense of wonder and humility inspired by the sublime or felt in the presence of mystery. … Awe, unlike fear, does not make us shrink from the awe-inspiring object, but, on the contrary, draws us near to it. This is why awe is comparable to both love and joy. – God in Search of Man by Rabbi Abraham Heschel.
The next word was Grace. He likened it most to Exodus 34:6 when God’s presence passed before Moses. He reminded us that God physically turns towards us. God has preferences for those struggling with health issues, the marginalized, the ones society judges as “less than.” God is near though we at times do not recognize the Presence.
The final word was Hope. It was likened as a rope or lifeline to vulnerable people with promise of a future fulfillment. God’s outcome or plan is better than we can imagine. Remember that no matter what happens, God IS in control.
I connected with the wife of the retreat team. We both have had fibromyalgia for many years. We both struggle with the things fibro and aging bring our way. We laughed in the hallway about we should write a comedy book together about the challenges of fibro.
Nicole and me
Like most of my friends she is a bit shorter than me. That just tells me we fit together!
The first definitive rain and cold front moved through here the other day. Up at the flower shop the wind even threw on its side a potted tree. The many oak leaves that had littered the yard are gone – poof! – taken off to other places. The maples are starting to change, but have not yet blessed us with yellow showers. That will begin momentarily.
Writing about October author Joyce Rupp in her book “May I Have This Dance” says, “Although autumn might seem to be a harsh reminder of death, we can also be encouraged to enter into the mystery of eternal life. We see autumn standing in surrender as the winds sweep her trees naked. The frost browns her meadows and deadens her plants. But a deeper truth is beneath the appearance of death.
“A movement toward life takes place in autumn. Dead leaves that seem to have no value are transformed by winter snows and spring rains to rich humus for new growth… No new growth will come unless autumn agrees to let go of what has been. The same is true of our lives.”
Is that woman a great author or what?!? Are we willing to let go of what has been? Bob and I celebrate our birthdays about three weeks apart. He is two years older than I am. This aging thing brings both of us face to face with the changes that have occurred in our bodies over the many years we have been married. We are no longer strong and as frivolous like in our youth. We both want to approach aging with calmness, peace and an acceptance of what is. That is easier to write than to do. So much easier.
Turn the page
I do know from reading and re-reading the book Radical Acceptance that I only increase my suffering by refusing to accept what is. So here I am turning the corner on 75 and he just turned 77. My older friends in their 80s and 90s tell me I am still young. Whew! I do not feel young!!
The Holy Spirit assures me that God is not finished with me yet. As I learn what I am to lay aside and where to proceed I remember the trees and the changes autumn brings.
Molly, can you stand in surrender and be encouraged to enter into the mystery of eternal life? Dallas Willard taught that eternal life begins now for those of us who love and follow closely after God. There truly are times in my encounters with the Holy One that I can forget the challenges by body presents and breath deeply of the life God offers me in the here and now.
The following piece of music helps me do just that if I will stop, breathe deeply and listen closely. I hope it helps you draw close to God in the present moment and blesses you. I hope you will take the time to listen to all of this piece. For me, it is like a musical prayer. Three minutes, 53 seconds of bliss. Just stop and listen.
Here is the last rose of the year from our gardens.
This bush grows in the front flower bed. I bought it for under $5 at Walmart and kept it in the garage until it got warm enough to plant. I shielded it from the chomping deer with berry netting. It did not have a great year with insects even though I sprayed it. If it comes back next year it will get treated with the wonderful Bayer rose treatments that Betty Cooksey introduced me to. (Bayer says not to treat them the first year of planting, though I was tempted!!) I just wish I could send you the heavenly fragrance.
I quit growing Knock Out roses for a couple of reasons. They grow tremendously LARGE thorns. They have NO fragrance. I know that almost every rose from the flower shops have no fragrance but I love the sweet smell of a rose. So if I am going to go the trouble of growing them, I want them to be fragrant.
Bob was working in the backyard to clear the nasty grass that grows into our lot from the neighbors. We had our garden bed built up in the back as a mound to try to keep the weeds and grasses out. He was working to rid us of the jewelweed. It has been trying to take over everything back there. Because of the hot drought weather this summer it was not even pretty. The hummingbirds did not seem interested. Perhaps if we removed it before the seeds exploded all over the place we will have less to deal with next year?
Ripe seed pods burst open when touched
The good news is he got 1/3 done the first day. The bad news is he fell down and I was not home. The good news is the fall detector on our new Apple Watches works!! The bad news is he bruised his hip and arm. The good news is he did not fall on his new knee replacement!!! Drum roll!! The other good news is he was able to get up by himself and has decided not to work in the garden again unless I am home.
He got the second third done out there another day. The yard is certainly looking as if autumn will fall upon us any minute. Weather man says leaves will fall in another couple of weeks. Then I will put the roses to bed under a pile of soil and pray for lots and lots of flowers next year!
AND … I guess I should have pruned these branches out back on that other rose! It way outgrew the berry netting. Bob teased that soon it will be touching the house. I was hoping it would bloom from those. Alas, it did not. Considering the deer ate it to the ground more than once last year, this is one amazing little shrub (oh, not so little before pruning).
Jeff, one of the guided meditation leaders on the app, recently noted there are 4 medicines of meditation
Concentration – home base
Clarity – notice what is actually happening, return to the present
Letting things be exactly as they are – allow, deep medicine of equanimity
Care – give self love and support
I was impressed that those are also what we try to get closer to by following the Jesus Way!
By concentration I think of as not being distracted by the things of the world. Focus upon God.
Clarity hoping to have the mind of Christ in this present moment. Here and now.
Letting things be exactly as they are – not trying to change things to suit ourselves and not whining and complaining about God not doing this MY way.
Care for ourself and others. Most of us have never learned consistent, healthy self care.
These four ‘medicines’ are taught by many different disciplines. I think they are important for us to remember and apply to our own lives.
These four merit occasional review to see how we are doing. Bob keeps reminders in his desk calendar on when to change the furnace filters, when to do various jobs throughout the year. Maybe we could each put these 4 in our calendars to review for ourselves once a month?!?
I was asked recently if I am writing to publish another book. I had scrapped the idea I thought was next. Then a new idea dropped into my heart. Actually it calls upon the old ideas I have been given. Thinking about collecting object lessons the Lord has given me over the years to keep me on the narrow path with him.
Here is one entry entitled “Why I Needed These Lessons.”
Here is one example. As I tried to learn how to follow Jesus and live for the Kingdom I began to realize one very large problem I would need to confront repeatedly was my tongue.
My words would often wound my children and my husband. “Death and life are in the power of the tongue, and those who love it will eat its fruits.” – Proverbs 18:21
“The tongue is a small part of the body, but it makes great boasts. Consider what a great forest is set on fire by a small spark.” – James 3:5
“He who guards his mouth and his tongue keeps himself from calamity.” – Proverbs 21:23
“Set a guard, O Lord, over my mouth; keep watch over the door of my lips!” – Psalm 141:3
“Let the words of my mouth and the meditation of my heart be acceptable in your sight, O Lord, my rock and my redeemer.” – Psalm 19:14
“If anyone thinks he is religious and does not bridle his tongue but deceives his heart, this person’s religion is worthless.” – James 1:26
Oh, I had a tongue! And I had never learned much about how to tame it. I determined that with God’s help I would begin to learn the taming process. That process often required apologies when it got away from me and hurt those I lived with.
I learned that we could offer sacrifices to our God. I found a small stone that looked to me to be a perfect altar. I found a tiny plastic sword in a restaurant sandwich. Then I created a clay tongue and pierced it upon that stone. It sat for many years in my kitchen windowsill as a reminder to me to give it over to God. I began to continuously ask for the power of the Holy One to come and tame that small part of my body that could so quickly run to evil and destruction when lashed upon others.
I used to teach the children that God created us to praise Him. I would then encourage them (and myself) to praise more and grumble less. Now I had to use that same lesson for my own tendency to use my tongue as a whip instead of an encouraging force.
“Know this, my beloved brothers: let every person be quick to hear, slow to speak, slow to anger.” James 1:19 Such a simple sentence to read and so very difficult to learn how to live! Slow to speak, slow to anger. I do not know which fought more to be in the forefront of my life, my Irish or German heritage.
The children are grown now and have children of their own. I am still wrestling with this tongue. I think I do better now in relation to them. I still have a challenge when I am tired or in pain. Then I tend to speak without thinking, and sadly, Bob usually takes the brunt of what I say. I have given him scars over the years and there are times when he thinks my tone of voice is meaning something I do not intend. God forgive me, I pray.
I think this discipline will continue until I take my last breath. There are times I think I should reconstruct the stone altar and the clay tongue. I am sure I have a plastic sword some place around here. Lord, deliver me from this tongue which I am so slow to bridle. Help me be quick to hear, slow to speak.
Maybe in this day and age I just need to get it literally pierced as a reminder?
Nah, not feeling it. Besides I would likely get it infected!
Fifty-five more years would not give me time to list all of the ways!
wedding rehearsal
the actual wedding
lunch with our best friendsfamily dinner celebration of birthdays and anniversaryright after his knee replacement surgeryexploring the wonders of the earthhow I love those hands
He has invested his life in mine. He knows me better than anyone else on earth. The compassion and grace that flows from him is beyond my words. His humor is sometimes tiring, but usually has me in giggles. The perspective he brings to me is invaluable. I have seen him give of himself to a fault. His determination to heal after this knee surgery is at times scary. Take it easy, my man. You are well on your way to full healing from this!
I cannot tell you how much I love him. Life without him is beyond my comprehension. Over the years we have talked about who will die first. I am saying it must be him. He is saying his lungs will not outlast me. Lord, only you know.
And I know Lord, you are able to keep us in all of our ways. Thank you for this man who blesses my life beyond telling.
Now to him who is able to keep you from falling and to make you stand without blemish in the presence of his glory with rejoicing, 25 to the only God our Savior, through Jesus Christ our Lord, be glory, majesty, power, and authority, before all time and now and forever. Amen. Jude 24-25 NSRVUE
Treasures in Plain Sight, A Christian Blog 