Best Laugh in Weeks

Did you see this on the news? Head first down the hill. Watch at the end for the log rolls! I laughed out loud! At about 31 seconds it seemed as if the caption should be, “I just hate when I get snow in my ears!”

If you get a message about video taken down, click on suggestion about YouTube and after the short ad you can see the video. Sorry for any inconvenience.

Language Humor

Learning to speak well is sometimes nurture and sometimes nature. When I was growing up one of Mom’s favorite TV shows was “Kids say the Darndest Things,” hosted by Art Linkletter. I can remember my sister coming home from Nancy’s house once. Nancy had a brother quite a bit younger than the girls. Paula quoted him as rushing in his parents dinner party shouting, “Mom! I’m blooding! I’m blooding! I can see the bleed!!” He eventually grew up to play professional baseball.

When our kids were young I used to write the funny things they said on pieces of paper and slip it in a drawer. It was so much fun to find those papers later and reminisce.

Emily was introduced to bagels when Great Grandma Pat and Aunt Ra came to visit from Queens. She was also learning that dogs differ in kind and have various names. For a while she referred to beagles as bagels.

Adults can speak silliness, too, me included! When the kids were young we often crossed the Little Miami River over a bridge with steel grating on the deck. It made a racket when we drove over it. At ages 4 and 1 year I did not want the kids to be startled, so I would always warn them, “We are going over the Woo-Ba, Woo-Ba bridge!” That was the sound of the car traversing the grating. As they got a little bit older I added the fact we were crossing the Little Miami River. Once right after crossing the bridge, Jeff asked, “Where’s my bridge?” Many times in his life this child has given me pause. It took me a bit to realize he often called his sister, “My Emmie.” Yep, he wanted the location of the “My Jeffie” bridge! No competition there!

We went to the beach with Grandgirl Lizzie when she was very young. As usual the typical beach town had flamingo signs here and there (although there were never any flamingos in that part of the USA). Lizzie decided they were better named “Falingos.” Sort of make you want to dance, doesn’t it?

Molly the Jumping Bean

When you were a kid did your parents let you order the Sea Monkeys advertised in almost every comic book of that era? Not mine. I might have had an ant farm once, unless that was my children? Can’t rightly remember. I did however have jumping beans. No idea where I got them, but they did jump. The ones that did not jump the kids in the neighborhood called duds. Now when I look up jumping beans on the internet they seem rather nasty and are not beans at all! Wikipedia, the know-it-all of earth, says Mexican Jumping beans are seed pods inhabited by the larva of a small moth. (Had she known, that would have made my mom say a resounding, “No!”)

Here is an entertaining two minute twenty-two second video coupling a Rube Goldberg set-up with time lapse photography and basic bean information.

This morning I woke up with agitation. I told Bob that packing and moving was a nice distraction from the pandemic, but now what? I was agitated and bored with all of this isolation and waiting to see who gets ill next. (My daughter has Covid for the second time and her entire family is infected.) The recent horror of politics is over for a few years, now what?

I had difficulty concentrating during my morning prayer time. I told the Lord “I am tired of doing this.” Almost immediately I realized this IS my life right now. So I need to make the most of this freezing rain, isolation, between was and is to be – this present moment is when my life is. Here. Now.

I have been using a new-to-me app called Calm. They provide meditations, music, ten minutes of relaxation (new daily) and BEDTIME STORIES. The stories are great and I rarely hear the end of a story! Recently I copied this quote from Calm: “The beginning is always this present moment.”

When I first read that I had to tell myself to soak that in. Live that out. The beginning is always this present moment. Quiet that jumping bean-like behavior. Be still in the shade of God’s Glory. Rest. “Oh Molly, be still. Rest, absorb, receive.”

Whoever dwells in the shelter of the Most High will rest in the shadow of the Almighty.

Psalm 91:1 NIV

In a little while I began writing this blog again. Thank you to all of you who follow these ramblings! I am always amazed when Word Press shows me how many folks are following and where they are all over the world. I realize I am not the only one bored with the whole Pandemic and isolation situation. Praying perhaps what I write helps you to smile and occasionally to calm down.

The beginning is always this present moment.

Author unknown

Dark Walks & Dog Laugh

As I was walking Lucky about 8 PM and shining the flash light noticed there was dew on the grass. No rain today, just evening dew.

Next night about 8 PM, walking Lucky again, it was even colder.

 21-1-10 © Molly Lin Dutina 
 Crunch of lawn, chill of air
 Even the dog hurries
 Back into the house
 Refreshed by venture out of doors
 Glad the door is closed now against the cold. 

The daylight is lasting longer each day now. I noticed I no longer need a flashlight or iPhone light for the dinner walk. Our dog is so goofy. She will not do her business in our yard, day or night. We must walk her each time. It is not all bad. I have been outside more than ever during this wintry weather. Sure hoping in new house she will just go in the yard. Maybe she will not recognize it as home at first and we can break this habit?

She is still a shrinking violet. Maybe I did name her wrong. She is timid even around us and we have lived with her since June! When we started wrapping the china in newspaper and bubble wrap she hid for the entire experience. My sister gave us some herbal aids. Guess I should have dosed her for that episode. It did not occur to me until the next day 😦

So one day Jeff and Rowan were coming over for Rowan’s birthday. She sometimes wants to nip company. I decided to give her some hemp drops for dogs from my sister. Not certain they helped as she started to get anxious at pizza time so I put her on a leash. Here was a laugh though. When I went to feed her dinner she actually drooled on my hand. That NEVER happens. As I walked to the sink to wash my hands I had to wonder, “Did she have the ‘munchies’ “?

Keep laughing out there!

Donkey Trail 1990

Stubborn Beast

90-6-25 Donkey Trail ©Molly Lin Dutina

“While traveling on the road of God’s will I hit a dip in the road and got jostled off the path. The dip occurred where the Lord asked me to do something, but fearing His will I inwardly said, “No!” Francis of Assisi was familiar with me when he called himself “Brother Ass.” I locked my knees, dug in my heels and soon resembled a stubborn donkey that must be pushed, pulled and cajoled to be made to move. Blind to my disobedient nature and still pouting before the holy ways of the Lord I decided if He really loved me, we could compromise on another way.

“I stepped onto the Treadmill of Debate, a perpetual conveyor belt going nowhere but in circles. Fearful and resistant to God’s will I asked, “Why?” and presented Him with all of the “What-ifs” and “If Onlys.” I formulated brilliant reasonings for resisting His ways, deluding myself and dropping further and further away from His light.

“Until I accepted His will, relinquished my ideas and gave all things over to Him I could not continue on the adventure of serving God. As usual, when I actually arrived at the point of resistance it turned out to be so unlike what I had imagined might occur, that later I wondered why I was so silly and donkey-like not to yield immediately in trust to Him. My efforts to control led me onto a futile treadmill going Nowhere. God’s mercy urges me to let Him direct my steps and enjoy His fellowship in the Now Here.

“Help me to trust You more, Lord. I want to live present to You in the Here and Now for in this experience alone is my salvation. As I begin to err, thank-you for taking me off the highway and into Your discipline. You truly are “able to keep me from falling and to present me without blemish before the presence of Your glory with rejoicing!” (Jude 24)”

Oswald Chambers

I have read his book My Utmost for His Highest for many years. This year I bought myself a perpetual page-a-day calendar with his personal prayers entitled Knocking at God’s Door. Here is the prayer for January 11:

Lord, the hilarious simplicity of trust in You seems almost levity until I remember You, and dare not not be glad! Spread joy and gladness all around us this day.

Oswald Chambers

Usually there are things of joy and gladness around me IF I will simply notice. When our children were young, say 1977-1987, we were able to purchase a small vacuum called a “DustBuster.”

A CLASSIC CREATION – – An original 1979 model of the Black & Decker DustBuster (pictured here), as of 1995, is a permanent part of the Smithsonian in Washington D.C., right next to one of Thomas Edison’s first light bulbs and Alexander Graham Bell’s first telephones in the National Museum of American History wing. The handy vac is celebrating its 30th birthday in 2009. (Image courtesy of Black & Decker / NOT for sale via The Times)

Today I learned from Wikipedia: “The design originated from the Apollo space mission, where NASA required a portable, self-contained drill capable of extracting core samples from the lunar surface. Black & Decker was tasked with the job, and developed a computer program to optimize the design of the drill’s motor and ensure minimal power consumption. That computer program led to the development of a cordless miniature vacuum cleaner.”

We got rid of that appliance years ago. Now we are going to build a new home that will have mostly laminate floors that look like wood. I found a good sale at Kohl’s and on the advice of a friend purchased a Eureka vacuum called a Blaze. It has a long handle and a floor attachments which can both be removed to create, yep! a ‘Dustbuster.’ Bob is using it right now as he patches places where we have hung photos frames, sands and paints the patch. No, it is not cordless, but it seems more powerful than the original one we owned.

Wikipedia continues: “By this time, (about 2008) it is estimated that over 100 million “Dustbusters” had been sold. “Dustbuster” has become a genericized trademark for a handheld vacuum cleaner in some parts of the world, due to its success as a design and worldwide recognition.” Just like we call facial tissues, Kleenex, and cotton swabs, Q-tips.

I find it so amusing that over 40 years ago we needed one to clean up after kiddos and now we need one to clean up after ourselves and our hairy dog! Yes, Beagles do SHED!!

Be glad and spread some joy today. Even if the gladness comes from a simple appliance like a Dustbuster!

Pour Out

There is an old nursery rhyme that with one hand on your hip and the other one extended, you recite, “I’m a little teapot, short and stout; here is my handle, here is my spout. When I get all steamed up then I shout, Tip me over and pour me out.”

Then there is the “adult” version with both hands on your hips, you say, “I’m a little teapot, short and stout; here is my handle, here is my…Oh damn, I’m a sugar bowl!” Bob Dutina’s absolute favorite, recited at least twice a month!!

No tea set is complete without a cup. Ray Bradbury had this sentiment.

We are cups, constantly and quietly being filled. The trick is, knowing how to tip ourselves over and let the beautiful stuff out.

Ray Bradbury quoted by Gratefulness.org

What is your plan for 2021 regarding “letting the beautiful stuff out?” Or do you have one? When I had two blogs going the other one was called Stand and Tip. I eventually realized that one blog would be better. Here is the poem that inspired me to begin two blogs. Perhaps I Could Ask You Just to Stand and Tip? ©1990 Molly Lin Dutina      

 
 1.
  
 Lily pads at the pond                  
 Grow on stalky stems
 Leaves unfold an opened palm
 Cupped at center point
 Summer shower starts to drop
 Mercurial glistening spheres
 Gathering in the center spot
 ‘til bulbous weight smears silver drops
 Into glistening globs
 And tips the leaves so full
 To pour their contents overboard
 And rising from the spill
 Stately shielded lily-hands
 Begin the cycle once more
  
 Keep my stem flexible, Lord
 My hands open and cupped
 Eager to receive Your all
 Questioning not Your skill
 Only trusting the power of Your love
 To melt my rigid will
  
 Drench me Lord 
 In Your shower of love
 Let me gather and drink my fill
 Then spill over on those around
 And rise to await Your will
  
 Send water of Your Spirit
 To tip me over, pour me out
 Then wash over me once again
 Fresh cleansing by Holy Words
  
                 2. 
  
 Shine Your light through
 This enshrouding mist
 Color me with covenant this:
 Abiding presence and constant love,
 Indwelling grace that conquers sin
 Transfigured rigid I
 Yielded and bent
 In Your   service                                                                                                                                    
 Spilling forth rivers of living water                                                                                                         
 And giving rest to croaky voiced frogs       
 Who, when Spirit-kissed,
 Become priests and kings           
 Singing their praises to You.
  
 Perhaps You ask me just to be Your lily leaf, 
 Stand and tip 

Conundrum of Safe Shopping

So I place my online order and picked up went to get it 2 days later. I get home and my husband says “Wasn’t this buy one get one free?” Yes, those notebooks were on sale and we only got one. So what would you have done with this online order? Would you have ordered two and hoped one was free? Or would you have ordered two and hoped you did not get four? I called the curbside phone number and the person who would decide if I was due another notebook was out to lunch. So, I have one notebook and no definitive answer yet. And the receipt has yet to show up online. Grrr.

Placed online order at another store. Had extra time before my pickup slot. Decided to dust and straighten up the house. Get to the store and realized my coupons were at home on the table. Drats! So I went home, unloaded groceries, ate lunch. Went back to the store. Put on double masks and went in to get my almost $9.00 refund. Came out to the car, washed my hands, took off the masks. It was worth the drive, even with gas and mileage. I am the one who used to cut coupons, wait until they had expired and THEN take the coupons to the store.

I get so frustrated with these safety measures, but so far neither one of us is sick with Covid. We do have colds, but so what? They are not severe or loaded with possible Covid symptoms.

It has been said, “This, too, shall pass.”

Retailers are saying this is the new way of shopping. So much for saving the planet. Some neighbors get Amazon deliveries two and three times a day! Guess I am just an old woman who would like to browse through the grocery store again. Online you cannot raid the markdown bins.

Benefits of Beagle Walking

Remember “Twas the Night Before Christmas?” I know in school we were required to memorize it. Walking the dog in bright moonlight one evening, like Christmas night, I was thinking, “The moon on the crest of the new fallen snow cast shadows like midday from objects below.” I knew it was not the exact verse of the poem which goes “The moon on the breast of the new-fallen snow gave the lustre of mid-day to objects below.” But OH the shadows from that brilliant moon.

This year one neighbor put up Christmas lights galore which were synchronized with music. It took him a few days to find the volume knob on the music. Every time I would step out with the dog in the evening I was blasted by the joyous chorus of Jingle Bells and other songs 3 houses away. When he finally turned the volume down, it became just pleasant caroling. The winds got the better of him and before Christmas Day most of his display was damaged or taken down.

AND BEST OF ALL!! Walking Lucky at about 2:00 one afternoon I heard them in the distance. Just one at first, but as they got closer multiple voices and YES! flying right over head was a flock of CRANES! I have seen them in New Mexico and we visited the large migration in Nebraska, but OHIO?!?! Turns out they are endangered here but have been making a revival. I did not have a camera or even a phone with me to catch a picture, but below is a photo taken in Nebraska when we went to see the great migration for ourselves.

photo by r m dutina

As you can see, there is no mistaking them for geese or herons as they fly with their necks extended, legs extended and have a huge wingspan. They also are really loud with their calls.

Keep looking for treasures in plain sight! Even when you least expect them. This beagle makes me go outside, even when I am reluctant to leave the warm house!