Recently we were watching a PBS series entitled Southern Storytellers. Online synopsis reads, “Southern creators of literature, music and film explore deep ties with the South: Billy Bob Thornton reflects on a life of writing songs and screenplays; Adia Victoria celebrates music and marriage near Nashville; David Joy laments the loss of the Appalachian culture he loves; Jericho Brown reveals the South to be essential to his creativity; and Mary Steenburgen remembers her Arkansas childhood.”
We thoroughly enjoyed each person’s story. I especially liked Mary Steenburgen’s song that she wrote for her husband, Ted Danson. I share it here with you and ask that you remember Bob Dutina, my husband of 52 years and 9 months, so far! He is a fabulous husband indeed!
We don’t have to pretend to be fine when we are not. We don’t need to push through and be strong. Gratitude is a soft landing place that requires us to be honest, open, and willing to look at everything we’re facing and not turn away.
Alex Elle
I find that quote really powerful. The tremendous freedom in it! Gratitude “REQUIRES us to be honest, open, and willing to look at everything we’re facing and not turn away.”
A dear friend of many years suffered a fall a couple months ago. She shattered several bones. The pain was tremendous. She was hospitalized, then nursing care, then yet another nursing home/rehab situation. It must have been very hard to look at everything she was facing and not turn away. I know she was relying upon the Lord in this grueling recovery situation. The pain still has not gone, but she is coping. I did not learn about her situation until recently. I would have liked to pray for her especially during the worst of it. I know she prayed for me during the worst part of my life years ago. After that fall, the image of a soft landing place could be comforting.
This diagram was used in several other places, so I used it, too.
A neighbor recently had a bout of falling. Her son thought it was from her back pain and perhaps too many meds. She was taken by life squad to the hospital. In reality it was Addison’s disease with severe dehydration. She was in intensive care for several days. We lifted her in prayer plus her son and husband. She is hom02e now and doing well. I wonder if she knows that gratitude soft landing place?
Is the image a heart or a praying mantis face?
As I draw closer to the Holy One, unhealed things rise to the surface. Lately I have been sorting through some feelings and stumbling blocks that tend to trip me up. I have suffered emotional scarring from several situations with women over my 70+ years. Part of me says, “get over it,” and part of me says “the wounds are still there.” This wounding keeps me from engaging with other women freely. There is always a huge part of me held in reserve. Most of it began in my childhood from my family of origin. Hard to believe those wounds are present so any years later! The LORD knows all my scars and has recently helped me heal another layer. He could not help me if I turned away and refused to face the wounds.
All of this has led me to a place of deeper gratitude. Nothing in our life can be taken for granted. Also, everything can eventually become a source of praise.
“We don’t have to pretend we are fine when we are not. We don’t need to push through and be strong.” I had to ask the LORD for help.
Search me, God, and know my heart; test me and know my anxious thoughts. See if there is any offensive way in me, and lead me in the way everlasting.
Psalm 139:23-24 NIV
Help me turn every discomfort to You. Show me the cause and help me give it to You for healing. Whether I am in pain emotionally, physically, or spiritually You know and are able to give me wisdom in each situation. If I must return to a topic 1,000 times I realize You never tire of healing and helping, guiding and growing me into the image of Jesus. I also know You are no respecter of persons; You desire to heal every person. Help us each to yield to You. Amen.
Most of my life my mother worked at a florist in Norwood, Ohio called Dorl & Fern. I met Mr. Dorl a few times. For years my mother told my sister and I how much she wanted to visit the Hawaiian islands in order to see the flowers. (Also, her only sister lived there.) Many times the arrangement designers in the shop would use flowers shipped from Hawaii. She was delighted with those arrangements. She especially like the idea of orchids growing along tree trunks. There was much delight as she worked with the local California florist to design my wedding bouquet. Sadly, she died before she was able to go to Hawaii.
Our wedding 1970
When we were planning our visit to Hawaii (the Big Island) and Maui we told our friends Dan and Betty that we definitely wanted to see the flowers. They directed us to the Botanical Garden just north of Hilo, officially called the Hawaii Tropical Bioreserve & Garden.
The folder they gave us when we paid our admission describes the place as “a garden in a valley on the ocean.” The land is ‘held in reserve for future conservation, protecting the beautiful Onomea Bay forever.’
I was not disappointed. The beginning of the trail was a downhill boardwalk among fascinating plants, many of which we had never seen before. We were also entertained by tiny colorful geckos along the way.
Anthurium I have seen in floral shops in Ohio but never in lavender!
Geckos often lose their tail when fighting, but can grow them back!
“Pink Maracas”
Bob and I were amazed later when we compared our photos. Some were duplicates and some were things the other had not noticed. My photos of the orchids were the most abundant of all the photos I took. If you are familiar with house plants you may see some growing in the photos. So here is photo album of my still shots. By the time I would learn to make a video from still shots I could likely write 3 blog entries. Hard to teach old dogs new tricks!
If you paste the link below into your browser you can see slides from the garden posted on the Bioreserve website. Sadly, they do not identify the plants.
And then there were the orchids! You have most likely seen orchids in grocery store floral departments or big box discount stores. They are nothing like these orchids!!
See photo to rightOrchid rooted on treeWhat we know as house plant called Peace Lily.Anthurium rooted on tree truckBob’s favorite orchid on treeI do not know all the namesrooted some place on that tree!delicate colorsSplatter painted?Splotched white area unlike belowMy thumb is to show you how tiny this one is!Not identical to white ones above.
Okay, so by then I was weeping. Truly weeping over the beauty my mother missed. Weeping over the beauty of God’s creation and how He arranged for us to have the privilege to see it. I swear at one point it was as if the man who walked away from me in the garden resembled Ted Dorl. I cried because in some way this has been a deep link with my memory of my mother. And now, I had completed it. We sat on a bench while I tried to compose myself. Two women walking past surely looked bewildered by my tears. Bob gladly indulged me while I walked among the orchids again, then I found more plants and started taking photos all over again.
My Christmas tree wishLook closely!There she is, tucked away!At first glance looks like a pansy to me!
You know how people print photos on mugs and phone cases and all sorts of things? I think I want this printed like that!
The flight over the volcano was stunning along with flying over the coast and the waterfalls, but this is my best memory. It was hard for me to leave. It was getting very hot and humid. I was wrung out from the emotional experience. Rarely have I felt so close to my mom since she passed. Our daughter turns 48 this week. That means mom died 48 years and two weeks ago. May she be surrounded by Jesus and flowers in all of heaven!
The earth is the Lord’s and all that is in it, the world, and those who live in it, for he has founded it on the seas and established it on the rivers.
This came up in my email today. The same sentiment arose another time and I can’t recall where!
Whatever may be the tensions and the stresses of a particular day, there is always lurking close at hand the trailing beauty of forgotten joy or unremembered peace.
Howard Thurman
“Trailing beauty of forgotten joy or unremembered peace.” With the smoke from the Nova Scotia fires moving into the Cincinnati area and the air quality index indicating the air is dangerous for those with compromised health issues it has been a rough time at our house.
My husband has COPD and, like me with my health issues, sometimes lives in a high state of denial. (COPD stands for chronic obstructive pulmonary disease.) The week of June 11-17 was exceptionally bad. Bob has had difficulty getting accustomed to the fact that the air quality index warnings have to do with him. It seemed that each day his symptoms got worse. Finally on Friday evening, June 16th, he crashed into his chair and knew he was ill. We were outdoors for a part of the day on the 17th for a celebration of life memorial for a friend of his. We went home and I locked him in the house. He likely should have seen a doctor on the 15th, but did not. By Sunday evening he knew he had to contact the doctor on Monday morning for at minimum steroids and antibiotics. I was convinced the doctor was likely to admit him to the hospital, though he did not.
The doctor got him in. Put him on steroids and told him if there was no improvement, antibiotics were next. Sent us home.
During that time I did lots of praying and lifting. The Lord told me I needed to yield to Him, too. I was shocked when I returned from retreat how very, very anxious I became about Bob’s health situation. Listening to the voice of the Spirit I realized why.
I had gone from trusting the Lord implicitly during the retreat to anxious and worried. How did that happen so quickly? I was reminded that my Dad had been chronically ill for years with heart disease. (There are many tales about that I could write, but not today.) I grew up living on edge about his condition. At ten and younger I did not quite understand that his condition would be fatal. My husband almost succumbed to flu in 2018. That is when his COPD went from mild to more severe.
Mayo Clinic online says, “COPD symptoms include breathing difficulty, cough, mucus (sputum) production and wheezing.” There were times I could hear Bob’s lungs rattle with wheezing from across the room. His cough became so severe and prolonged that I wondered if he would bring up part of a lung instead of just mucus. Sunday evening his breathing was fast and very shallow. One night he must have coughed in his sleep. I, too, was asleep; however, I came straight up out of the bed thinking he had fallen. He was asleep in the bed. The LORD spoke to me that my anxiety was linked to that childhood experience of my father’s heart disease and subsequent early death. (At the time he was 46 yrs. old, I was 11 yrs. old.) I am no longer that child. The Spirit helped me recognize this and release that childhood scarring to my heavenly Father.
So as Monday morning came I was listening to the LORD, praying, releasing my fears, declaring to God that whatever happened at the medical office my heart was in His hand. I am sorry to report that my praise over the doctor not hospitalizing Bob was not as robust as my praise before the appointment thanking God for giving us good medical care. I think I had braced myself and was not quite certain what to do in the aftermath. Isn’t that sad?
We went out to lunch at his favorite place. Visited the pharmacy for the new medication. Came home, tended to housekeeping duties and took our rest. He was still very sick. That afternoon when my watch rang for the afternoon alert to bring my attention back to Christ, I gave thanks that we were working together on vacation photos and other office matters. I confessed my shame at not being more grateful immediately after the appointment.
This morning he decided to text the doctor as his sputum was no longer clear. Doctor had said that would indicate need for antibiotics. Bob did all of that before I was out of bed! This round of denial is certainly over.
“Trailing beauty of forgotten joy or unremembered peace.” Beauty – we went out to lunch. Were able to celebrate our recent vacation to Hawaii and not get swamped by fears about the illness. Unremembered peace – relief as I texted two people who were praying as we went to the doctor. We each think sending him home was good news.
Having ridden this roller coaster so recently I am trying to maintain an even attitude towards this illness. When he was intubated in 2018 the doctor told me that COPD can ‘turn on a dime’ meaning someone with this illness can go from sick to extremely ill in no time at all. That makes it hard to suspend my fears and hesitation. I am determined though, ‘with God’s help.”
Even to your old age and gray hairs I am he, I am he who will sustain you. I have made you and I will carry you; I will sustain you and I will rescue you.
Isaiah 46:4 NIV
Today (June 28) the air quality is again dangerous. We have closed up the house and are praying this does not exacerbate his symptoms. Stay well!
When our children were young I purchased a poster from American Bible Society that had portions of Psalm 95 around the edges. Every night before they went to sleep I would read it to them after stories and before prayers.
I came across Psalm 95 when reading and praying Morning Prayer from the Book of Common Prayer was my practice. In my personal copy of Common Prayer I wrote the definitions of Meribah – STRIFE or CONTENTION and Massah – TEMPTATION. A few verses of the Psalm are repeated in Hebrews 4. I had studied Hebrews 4 in depth tying to understand the concept of entering God’s rest.
O that today you would listen to his voice! 8 Do not harden your hearts, as at Meribah, as on the day at Massah in the wilderness, 9 when your ancestors tested me, and put me to the proof, though they had seen my work. 10 For forty years I loathed that generation and said, ‘They are a people whose hearts go astray, and they do not regard my ways.’ 11 Therefore in my anger I swore, ‘They shall not enter my rest.’
Psalm 95:7b-11 NRSV
Strife and temptation. Yes, I am so prone to those two! Likely, you are also?
What lead me to this Psalm again was an attempt to express the wonders of the LORD I have found over the past six weeks. I will just let you read it.
Subtitle: A Call to Worship and Obedience
1 O come, let us sing to the Lord; let us make a joyful noise to the rock of our salvation! 2 Let us come into his presence with thanksgiving; let us make a joyful noise to him with songs of praise! 3 For the Lord is a great God, and a great King above all gods. 4 In his hand are the depths of the earth; the heights of the mountains are his also. 5 The sea is his, for he made it, and the dry land, which his hands have formed.
6 O come, let us worship and bow down, let us kneel before the Lord, our Maker! 7 For he is our God, and we are the people of his pasture, and the sheep of his hand.
O that today you would listen to his voice! 8 Do not harden your hearts, as at Meribah, as on the day at Massah in the wilderness, 9 when your ancestors tested me, and put me to the proof, though they had seen my work. 10 For forty years I loathed that generation and said, ‘They are a people whose hearts go astray, and they do not regard my ways.’ 11 Therefore in my anger I swore, ‘They shall not enter my rest.’
Psalm 95 NRSV
I pray you rejoice over the LORD. Make a joyful noise to Him. Give Him thanks. Understand that He is the Great King! The depths of the earth, heights of the mountains, the sea and dry land – all are His for He made them! We are the sheep of His hand. LISTEN to His voice and be renewed in life and strength and grace.
In Hawaii we would begin the day at sea level them go for a drive. Before too long we were at 3,000 feet. My ears began to pop! Then suddenly we could see the snow atop Mauna Loa where the observatory sits. No, my photos did not come out. Just imagine palm trees and flowering shrubs, geckos running around and then seeing snow. Made me go yikes. At first Bob did not believe me. Then he saw with his own eyes and he too was amazed.
USGS reports on Mauna Loa: “Its long submarine flanks descend to the seafloor an additional 5 km (16,400 ft), and the seafloor in turn is depressed by Mauna Loa’s great mass another 8 km (26,200 ft). This makes the volcano’s summit about 17 km (55,700 ft) above its base! The enormous volcano covers half of the Island of Hawai‘i and by itself amounts to about 85 percent of the area of all the other Hawaiian Islands combined.” https://www.usgs.gov/volcanoes/mauna-loa
online Flicker photo- those look like sheep beneath the trees!
Remember Brody the flour covered dog? He got a date to prom!
This is that very long legged hound, if you recall from previous post!
Here is Ellie in her gown
And with her proud parents!
I was hoping the poppies I bought would bloom before we departed. The first one was orange and I hooray-ed! The second one was yellow and I was delighted!
And yes, spring warmth has finally arrived complete with humidity and emerging ferns!
I bought one fern in 1985. We have shared so many ferns off of the original plant. I have given the root away to friends and now we have them growing nicely at this our third and likely final house!!
Suitcases are packed. Laundry is done. Ride to airport arranged. Cannot believe it is finally time to go! We deliver Lucky to Lizzie tomorrow. Our house sitters are all set up. Woo-Hoo! Happy 52+ wedding anniversary to us!!
Give thanks to the Lord, for He is good; His love endures forever.
Psalm 118:1 NIV
Give thanks to the Lord, for He is good. His love endures forever.
Psalm 136:1 NIV
And let His people say Amen! And let the Robert Dutina family say Amen! Let all God’s people say Amen!
When you read this we are packing to go to Maui tomorrow! I am stunned writing these details. 🙂
Wowsers! This year has flown past. We attended our Grandgirl’s last volleyball club tournament yesterday. Seems we just attend her first game in elementary school – or was that middle school? Well, no matter, she actually graduates in a few weeks! She will go on to play with University of Cincinnati Clermont campus volleyball team. First though is Senior prom and graduation!
I bought a pot of Asian lilies and planted them in the front garden. A sharp wind during a rainstorm one day broke off one stem of blooms. A bird had also perched in the tree above the lilies and decorated the blossoms with its waste. Yuck. Somehow in all the Scriptures about the lilies of the field and the flowers of the earth to my knowledge that event is never mentioned! Imagine.
on kitchen counterstem broke off this front edge
By the time you read this we will have landed in Hawaii for our trip of a lifetime! Our one and only visit to the 50th State. We had planned to go in 2020 for our 50th wedding anniversary and our 50th state to visit. The pandemic cancelled that. At that time Hawaii said “You can come but you have to quarantine for 2 weeks.” We can barely afford ten days in Hawaii much less 24! So our trip is finally underway. Married 52 years now!
My mother always wanted to visit to see the flowers growing there, but she died having never been there. Her sister also lived there. I have two cousins living in Lihue, but we will not be able to see them. The commuter flight between islands is $115 per person. We plan to visit Hawaii and Maui. They live on Kauai.
I can barely believe we are actually going. I typed out our itinerary spelling (to us) bizarre names like Waikoloa, Akala, Holualoa, Punaluu. Realized I had misspelled Kilauea once I said it out loud! We are staying at Hapuna beach on Hawaii (not so bad) and Kaanapali on Maui. Monokalani and Kaihalulu are weird. It does not help that instead of trying to pronounce the names while we planned Bob just made up words with lots of vowels and syllables!!
So as long as we remember to get groceries on Maui at the airport city in Kahukui on Kaahumanu avenue, (oh my!) we ought to be fine?
Because every single thing is imported to Hawaii all the prices are high. We will likely return broke. Our daughter says to go ahead and spend!
Please pray for safe travels! Opening photo is by Michael Swiet.
Many things occur in our neighborhood that are accompanied with sounds and noise. When I am writing the blog (preferable on Monday and Tuesday mornings) I pray, play music and try to tune out all the distractions. Today was no different.
Except, there was this clunk. Then later another clunk. Then two clunks in a row. The sounds were not rhythmic like a worker. Finally, I could not take it and had to go try to find the source of the distracting disturbance. What was causing this commotion?
I went outside. Okay the Royce fertilizer guy was down the street, but not making the noise I kept hearing. Nothing to the left of our house. Nothing else to the right.
I went out back. No workers there that I could detect. The trees have filled out so it is a bit harder to see the other houses. I went into the master bathroom. When I came back to the kitchen there was the sound. A Robin at the sliding glass door!
Earlier we had seen robins on the deck which is unusual. They seemed huge and likely were just puffed against the wind and chill. April 24 and 33 degrees! Go figure! One in particular seemed to be liking the rungs under the black metal porch side table. I noticed piles of gooey waste from that bird. Rinsed them off with glasses of water.
Now Lucky wanted in on the act. I told her to chase the birds off. Instead she decided to roll her ear in the most recent pile of waste. I moved the sliding screen door. I moved the lace curtain thinking perhaps she was seeing a “rival” in the door – her reflection. I put plastic planters upside down in front of the door and brought the water hose over the railing. Back to writing.
Thump. Thump. Really? I went to the door declaring, “I need cat!” and called “Here kitty, kitty.” No response though there had been an orange tabby in the yard recently.
I moved the sliding screen over the door where I thought the bird was knocking. This time I left the dog out on the deck. Of all the places in this wooded area, why our deck? Oh well. Those birds should go next door. That neighbor has a sliding glass door, too. She has a deck and no pets!
Do you know the center verse of the Bible? (These are facts that Christians like to collect.) I think the center verse is no accident as it has kept me from many troubles.
It is better to take refuge in the Lord than to put confidence in man.
Psalm 118:8. Another version reads “than to put confidence in mortals.” Take refuge in the LORD. Not the ones about you who you can see and hear, but who will die. The Almighty LORD, King over angel armies, He is to be our refuge.
The photo above was from online. It reminds me! We are going to make the trip of a lifetime (at least for us). When our 50th wedding anniversary rolled around we had planned to go to visit our 50th state. That was when the pandemic hit. Hawaii basically said, “You can come here, but you must quarantine for 2 weeks before you travel about.” My response was I can barely afford 2 weeks in Hawaii, much less a month!” So we put off our trip. Bob was really liking the idea of our 50th state and our 50th anniversary 😦
So this year we will celebrate our 53rd wedding anniversary and visit our 50th state! We have consulted our Hawaii experts the Cookseys. We have met several times with a travel agent. Bob is trying to overcome his discomfort about being on an island (or two) totally surrounded by water. We want to see the flowers, helicopter over the volcanoes, see rainbows, enjoy the tropics, birds, jungle plants, etc. Bob plans to eat lots of seafood. I think pineapple sounds delicious. I am even thinking about taking a vacation from writing the blog. Yikes, (Can she do that?)
We have a dog sitter. A house sitter. And by the time we return we might actually be broke! Our daughter says to go ahead and spend. We just might on this trip!
Sometimes when I was growing up I got to go to sunrise service on Easter morning. I think my favorite one was held at French Park in Cincinnati. The weather was often chilly and even at times rainy, but we were determined to celebrate the resurrection of our Lord as the sun came up!
My mother worked for many years at a flower shop in Norwood, Ohio. One year she brought home some purple hyacinths and plucked each flower off, wrapped it in wet cotton, wired and taped it. Then she assembled them as an Easter corsage for me. To this day the fragrance of purple hyacinths remind me of her. Though she lived a troubled life I believe her faith in Christ took her to be with Him when her life on earth ended.
None of these things help my soul celebrate the life, death and resurrection of Jesus as much as my gratitude lists. When Ann Voskamp wrote One Thousand Gifts I wonder if she knew how the practice would revolutionize the American Christian church? Certainly it changed her life, but do we ever truly know the impact our writing will have upon others? I wonder.
Have you practiced writing down the gifts in your life that Christ Jesus has bestowed upon you? Have you given Him thanks this Easter? Here are some of my thanksgivings.
Sunshine
Rain in due season
Salvation for my soul
You give strength to hearts that are true to You
Your righteous shall live by faith
our home
the longevity of my marriage
Justice that rolls down and righteousness as an ever-flowing stream
God with us
You know the hairs upon our heads
The Convent of the Transfiguration
my sisters in Journey Together in Stitches
crochet and knit group at senior center
Your Spirit that gives me life
Your breath in our lives
My children
My grandchildren
Laundry now on first floor
small gardens to delight my soul
the bluebirds at the office window
rabbits in Angela’s yard
THE BEAGLE
Grogu to make me smile
Noodle the Corgi that makes me smile
music
music memories from over the years
The Holy Spirit speaking in my soul
My Bible and Bible Gateway tool
Rheude’s small group
Lucky learning to play with her toys
Cooking
Great Smoky Mountains and spring wildflowers there
Medical care
freedom of religion
clouds
spring peepers
gifts
dark chocolate
coconut!
travels we have done
travel planned to Hawaii
blogging friends
New Mexico friends
Neighbors who are friends
running water in our home
crocheting
sewing for our home and others
museums of art
Cincinnati Nature Center
red winged blackbirds
butterflies
armor of God
Abraham’s example of faith and obedience
Andrew Peterson’s music
Learning to be a living sacrifice
loving husband
forgiveness
the Great I am
firemen
police officers
electronic books from the library
my sister
pinwheels
soap bubbles
even to old age He will keep me
black licorice
Spirit of God who raised Christ from the dead LIVES in us
I can entrust my soul to my faithful creator
iPad with keyboard
ear buds for listening while walking the dog
Living Water
Seashells
heating pad
ocean sounds
He walks with me and talks with me
rainbow in the sky reminds me of rainbow around the throne
the Psalms
friends serving in Nepal
New Covenant in my mind and on my heart
Jesus is made unto me wisdom, righteousness, sanctification and redemption
“Pajama church” when you can’t make it to service
His still small voice
Bob’s sense of humor
a good fresh salad
piano music
people I know I can ask to pray – knowing they will do it
cellos
live drama performances
good ham salad
music by Brandon Lake
writing poetry
Mizithra cheese sauce on angel hair spaghetti
broccoli slaw, just yum
Spirit of God helps me write
That is my partial list. How about you? Get a little notebook and begin to list your praises and things you are grateful for! It will work wonders for you 🙂
This winter our son fell on black ice while walking into work. He suffered both knee injury and shoulder injury.
For those of you living where ice does not happen, good old Wikipedia describes it as: Black ice, sometimes called clear ice, is a thin coating of glaze ice on a surface, especially on streets. The ice itself is not black, but visually transparent, allowing the often black road below to be seen through it. The typically low levels of noticeable ice pellets, snow, or sleet surrounding black ice means that areas of the ice are often practically invisible to drivers or people stepping on it. There is, thus, a risk of slippage and subsequent accident due to the unexpected loss of traction.
He has been under medical care ever since. This afternoon he will finally receive shoulder surgery. There is a tear and they are going to repair it. Please pray for successful surgery and rapid thorough healing. He has been in pain for months.
If you have ever had shoulder surgery you know that getting comfortable afterwards is a major deal. He will not even be able to use his right hand for a long time after the surgery. And yes, he is right handed.
He is hoping for some major pain relief from the surgery and we are lifting that to the Father also.
I ask your prayers for him and his family (wife and son). I look forward to updating you with great news soon! He has been in physical therapy for his knee (same fall) and it seems to be healing nicely.
Concern for our kids never goes away, even when they are in their mid-40s!
Making the decision to have a child – it is momentous. It is to decide forever to have your heart go walking around outside your body.
Treasures in Plain Sight, A Christian Blog 