Posted on June 2, 2024June 1, 2024 in Aging, Faith, Illness and Health, medical treatment, Praise, Thanks, Writing Life

June 1st!

New Month and at the end we will be halfway through 2024. How did that happen?

The epidural I had did not take away the pain in my back/hip. The pain specialist decided I will benefit from a “Medial Branch Block.” Medicare requires two trial injections first. So I will go in this month and have the first injection. He says we should be able to tell immediately if it is effective. Then I return for a followup visit. They will then schedule the second trial. If that also works, I will get an injection that basically will burn the nerve that goes to that hip. It is not supposed to impair anything else. Relief can last 6-9 months? When the nerve grows back he can administer the burning of the nerve repeatedly without the trial injections. That is good news to me. I was plenty discouraged when the pain was there after the previous injection.

And more good new! Baby Francesca got he new heart and should be headed home soon. Lucky dog has responded well to first injection of arthritis medication. She has now had her second and things are looking good for her!

This month I also get to make another 6 day retreat with a spiritual director. I am so looking forward to that! Last year I learned so much about myself and my direction. This year my quest is similar.

I am seeking what the Lord would want me to do with all this writing. I believe I am to take selections from the blog and rework them, perhaps for a booklet? I will remove YouTube links and multiple photos. Trying to get at the gist of what I am saying … Words fail me to tell you more.

Suffice it to say if you have favorites among what you have read on this blog I would love to hear from you what that selection is. You can refer to the date or title. I am fairly certain I can locate with just that info. It is very hard to re-read what I have written and choose a few favorites for myself. I have 3 local people looking through the printouts and marking them with post-its. Rewriting will take a lot of work, but I don’t mind writing work. Just trying to find where I go, what I do from here.

Thanks for your help!

I will praise the Lord, who counsels me;
even at night my heart instructs me. Psalm 16:7 NIV

Praise the Lord, all his works
everywhere in his dominion.

Praise the Lord, my soul. Psalm 103:22 NIV

Posted on May 22, 2024May 19, 2024 in Aging, Challenge, Faith, Humor, Illness and Health, medical treatment, Spiritual discipline, Spiritual growth

My State of Aging 2024

Things that used to be a breeze are now So Very Difficult Routines of self-care take longer and longer. Maybe complicated is a better descriptor?

Not enough to brush my teeth (what few teeth remain). And use the expensive toothpaste the hygienist insists upon. Now there must be floss, rubbery pick, fluoride toothpaste AND DON’T RINSE!

Take bedtime medications, but remember to do it before caring for the teeth because I AM NOT TO RINSE AFTERWARDS. Don’t forget the Tylenol and the other over the counter pill that aids with sleep. Inject the right units of insulin.

Use the fluoride rinse if you can fit it in. Perhaps do that after I eat breakfast? Use that rubbery pick thing after every meal. Last night after dinner I used it while watching TV. Then I noticed that some of the green bristles were missing. WAIT a minute!! Aren’t we supposed to be careful NOT to ingest plastic? Oi, the drama never ends!

Once a month inject that biologic that crushes the psoriasis. Thank goodness the pharmaceutical company provides it free of cost. Have to mark it on the calendar just like the dog’s tablet for anti-flea medication.

Now I am going to be wearing a continuous glucose monitor. Medicare covers the cost of that thing. The doctor’s office will teach us how to install it. Another insert-able thing, this one in the back of my arm. “Not always the same arm, not always the same place, not in a lump or scar.” Monitor should link to my iPhone to give readouts. If I link it to the reader they sent, I cannot use my iPhone to get the readings. Supposed to help teach me the impact of what I eat by showing me moment to moment what my blood glucose is. Check readout before each meal. If it goes too high I am to inject more insulin. They will have to teach me how much and when. This seems like a lot to manage. I will also need to change the device weekly.

Wait! I was taught to check my glucose 2 hours after eating. I smack my forehead and groan. I confuse easily!

Oh, I am a lot to manage!

Does continuous monitor mean I no longer have to begin the day with a finger stick? Well, at first I have to do both. Crap. I get so tired of needles.

Add to that the stretches as I continue to recover from shoulder surgery. If the plantar fasciitis flares up return to doing those stretches, too.

Oh by gosh, by golly! I feel as old as Santa and a lot less spry. Bob reminds me that I have “better living through modern chemistry.” So I fill the prescription boxes for breakfast, lunch, dinner, and bedtime, 2 weeks worth. I always say a prayer of gratitude that I am able to afford the medications I need.

The iPhone says if I want to add the weather to my watch face that is called a “complication.” Same for the date and time. I suppose I am just a ‘complicated’ woman. Glad to be cared for, even if I complain. I tell God, “I’m trying.” God replies, “Yes, dear, very trying.”

Learning to turn all of this from overwhelming to let God have it. The Trinity is willing and able to direct my steps and help me walk through these things. I name them one by one and ask the Holy One to direct my steps. I relinquish these challenges to You and ask for comfort and wisdom in how to manage all of it.

But the wisdom from above is first of all pure. It is also peace loving, gentle at all times, and willing to yield to others. It is full of mercy and the fruit of good deeds. It shows no favoritism and is always sincere. James 3:17 NLT

Eventually, new things can become routine. Does anyone know how to make certain I take the lunch pills at lunch and don’t forget them?

Posted on May 15, 2024May 7, 2024 in Aging, Faith, Illness and Health, Thanks, Yield

Ooh, Ouch!

Writing will likely be sporadic this week. I have to stop taking the prescription for arthritic pain for 4 days. Then on Tuesday I am having a lumbar epidural to try to relieve pain in vertebrae 4, 5 and 6. Or is it 3, 4, and 5. All due to bulging discs.

Regardless what numbers the doctor knows and is skilled. Just think of the most sore place in your body and put a big needle there with steroid medication. Ouch is right. SO grateful I learned LaMaze breathing during 23 hours of labor these many years ago. It really helps with pain during an injection such as this.

Conscious (or patterned) breathing used to be the hallmark of Lamaze childbirth education. For many, it’s still an important way to stay relaxed and on top of their contractions. It’s true that conscious breathing can help you relax and feel less pain during contractions. There’s no “right” way to breathe in labor, despite what others may tell you. Slow, deep breathing helps to manage the pain of contractions. But the right way for you to breathe is whatever feels right to you. Issues like your number of breaths per minute, breathing through your nose or your mouth, or making sounds (like hee-hee) with your breaths are only important if they make a difference for you.

It may help you to have a visual focus to accompany your conscious breathing. You can recall an image with your eyes closed, focus on a picture or special object from home, keep your eyes on your support person or simply stare at a spot on the wall. You may also find that as labor progresses, faster, shallower breathing—like a dog gently panting—feels better. https://www.lamaze.org/lamaze-breathing

I was going to show you a photo of needle they will use but it just creeped me out too much. So if the posts are sporadic this week, just remember to pray for me please: that the injection will do its work, that the doctor and I will both be calm, that the rest after the injection will move me more quickly towards a more pain free life. Thank you.

Posted on March 6, 2024May 23, 2024 in Aging, Book quotes, Challenge, Faith, Illness and Health, medical treatment, Prayer, Spiritual discipline, Spiritual growth, Worship

Will You Breathe Deep?

Posted on March 5, 2024May 23, 2024 in Aging, Book quotes, Faith, Illness and Health, Journal, medical treatment, Spiritual discipline, Spiritual growth, Thanks, Yield

Elisabeth and Lilias

Posted on March 3, 2024May 23, 2024 in Art, Book quotes, Faith, Illness and Health, Listen, medical treatment, Nature, Poetry, Prayer, Spiritual discipline, Spiritual growth, Yield

Elisabeth Elliot

Posted on February 29, 2024May 23, 2024 in Challenge, Faith, Illness and Health, Journal, Listen, Spiritual discipline, Spiritual growth, Worship, Yield

Lectio 365

This app really helped me focus on the Lord during my recovery. Bob and I had first been introduced to the practice of Lectio Divina while at the Episcopal church.

The app Lectio 365 is inspired by the “practice of Lectio Divina. Each morning the devotional follows the simple P. R. A. Y. rhythm:

P:ause to be still.
R:ejoice with a Psalm and R:eflect on Scripture.
A:sk for God’s help
Y:ield to His will in your life.

“On Sundays you’ll take a break from the normal routine to pray a different kind of Sabbath prayer.

“The app celebrates heroes of faith on Feast Days, marks significant moments in the church calendar, and welcomes guest hosts throughout the year.”

They also offer an evening version that differs in text from the morning one. I found myself using that evening version while trying to fall asleep in the recliner. It was quite helpful for turning my eyes to the Lord and finding a place to relax in His arms. It is so easy when in pain to clench against the pain, and finding release from that clenching is such a relief!

Here is one thought I recorded in my very few journaling notes during that time.

The Greek text uses a word which can mean breath, spirit, or wind. So, ‘the wind blows where it wishes’ can also mean, ‘the Spirit breathes where He wishes’. The Spirit, like the wind, is unpredictable. I cannot control Him. Sometimes the Spirit blows like a gentle breeze. Or He may come as a hurricane. I have to accept that I’ll never know what He might do next. Lectio 365

The Spirit breathes where He wishes. Yes, Lord, please breathe on me I pray.
24-1-12 Molly’s Journal

Looking out the window by my prayer chair I was able to watch the toy pinwheels as the Lord of the wind made them dance. He is always with us!

Rest in His love and consider changing up one of your devotional practices for a bit. He is able to meet us wherever we are, but there are times when we fall into a rut spiritually and can use a boost from a change of format. Try some thing new a for the remainder of the Lenten season. You might find new meaning to your relationship with the God of our Fathers.