On our hunt 2013 for pink Lady’s Slippers Elusive wild orchids of the Smoky Mountain woods I was surprised to see this woman With a walker that rolled It also had a seat for when she needed to rest
At first sight, I thought “poor thing’ At second glance I realized It likely was harder for her to get here Than me, walking under my own pained power But she was here to see The same sights as me. We both smiled with satisfaction At this glorious creation.
As we parted she asked the Lord’s blessing upon me. She also posed the question “Well, what else are we going to do?” Yes, we cope as best we can Whatever condition life throws at us
Now in 2024, viewing the Lady’s Slippers at the exact same location I pray she too was able to come see them this year
I will not forget her lesson of joy Determination, fortitude, courage Doing what your soul needs done Regardless of what your physique May declare
Therefore we do not lose heart. Though outwardly we are wasting away, yet inwardly we are being renewed day by day. For our light and momentary troubles are achieving for us an eternal glory that far outweighs them all.
2 Corinthians 4:16-17 NIV
The flowers appear on the earth; the time of the singing of birds is come, and the voice of the turtle is heard in our land.
One of our favorite adventures is wild flower hunting in the Great Smoky Mountain National Park. We use to try to go every other year. We have gotten away from that practice. We decided to return this spring and test ourselves to see if we are still able to hike the trails where we have found our favorite flowers, especially Lady’s Slippers.
Lady’s Slippers are wild orchids and are quite rare. We learned not to tell others where we find the flowers. They need a specialized environment to grow. Some folks try to pick them. They do not thrive. Some folks try to dig them up and take them home. You cannot duplicate their environment. They even require a certain kind of fungus to grow.
In order to survive and reproduce, pink lady’s slipper interacts with a fungus in the soil from the Rhizoctonia genus. Generally, orchid seeds do not have food supplies inside them like most other kinds of seeds. Pink lady’s slipper seeds require threads of the fungus to break open the seed and attach them to it. The fungus will pass on food and nutrients to the pink lady’s slipper seed. When the lady’s slipper plant is older and producing most of its own nutrients, the fungus will extract nutrients from the orchid roots. This mutually beneficial relationship between the orchid and the fungus is known as “symbiosis” and is typical of almost all orchid species.
We hiked our first test, The Townsend trail called Middle Prong of Little River. We did not find the Jack-in-the-pulpit. One of my favorites. With global warming it is difficult to know when we should travel there. The “Jacks” along this trail had already bloomed and wilted. The waterfalls, however, were running gloriously. The rushing water always reminds me of the ‘streams of living water’ promised in the New Testament.
37 On the last day of the feast, the great day, Jesus stood up and cried out, “If anyone thirsts, let him come to me and drink. 38 Whoever believes in me, as[a] the Scripture has said, ‘Out of his heart will flow rivers of living water.’” 39 Now this he said about the Spirit, whom those who believed in him were to receive, for as yet the Spirit had not been given, because Jesus was not yet glorified. John 7:37-39
Along the trail we did see Showy Orchis. It too is part of the orchid family. The ones below are fairly bleached out indicating they are older blooms.
If you notice the fly on the leaf you can estimate the size of the flowers!
Here we are, not pros at selfies, but delighted to have made it up our first trail!
Waterfall between us!
We checked into our motel and rested towards our BIG hike. It was amazing how things looked so different. A couple of years of absence, a few wind storms and bunches of fallen trees – we at times had difficulty recognizing the next trail.
Unheard of for me to hike 5.11 miles. My shoulder definitely felt it that evening.
My phone told me about my activity level. It was very high activity level for me. There was some difficulty from pain on the way back to the car. Phone did not record flights climbed, but the altitude did change throughout the morning.
One phenomenon I never tire of is the swallowtails and other butterflies sipping minerals from horse apples.
photo by Molly Lin
photo by r m dutina – notice all the wing movement he caught!
photo by r m dutina THIS is why we hiked so hard!
and these hidden on the hillside, but not from us! photo by r m dutina
Yep, old folks hiking and spotting and then, not exactly scampering, but getting up the hillside for a better shot! The horses are not allowed on this part of the trail, but old people are!
photo by r m dutinaphoto by r m dutina – While up there he saw her, too!
We hope and pray this was not our last time on this trail, but if we cannot make it the next time we visit, at least for this one day we were totally satisfied! the hike back to the car is all down hill and takes a toll on your knees, not to mention your back. We made it! Only had to rest a few times and rest is okay. One friend gave me a sticker that says “It doesn’t matter how slow you go, as long as you don’t stop!“I just imagine if these are the lady’s slippers we know about, how many more are hidden on this part of the earth! The Lord certainly delights us with beauty.
But ask the animals, and they will instruct you; ask the birds of the sky, and they will tell you. 8 Or speak to the earth, and it will instruct you; let the fish of the sea inform you. 9 Which of all these does not know that the hand of the Lord has done this? 10 The life of every living thing is in his hand, as well as the breath of all humanity. Job 12:7-10 CSB
Life meanders like a path through the woods. We have seasons when we flourish and seasons when the leaves fall from us, revealing our bare bones. Given time, they grow again.
KATHERINE MAY
During my formative years my parents always kept a dog. Four years ago Bob and I adopted a small beagle from a rescue shelter. She was very, very timid. The shelter had brought her from the wilds of Kentucky. They believed she had run away from a breeder. When they spayed her somehow the vet knew she had delivered two sets of puppies. They also had to pull many of her teeth. It is believed she had chewed her way out of a metal cage that the locals there called a coop. She broke off many of her teeth doing that.
We brought her home and did our best to get her settled. We gave her toys and she had no clue what to do with them. We would roll a ball and she would watch it as if to say, “So?” Eventually she relaxed in our company.
She thoroughly enjoyed her first pup cup of Starbucks whipped cream!
She learned how to help Bob drive.
About 4 months after we adopted her she was attacked by a pit bull in the neighborhood. We rushed her to the vet for an emergency Sunday visit. It was my birthday. She had head trauma, puncture wounds and soft tissue injuries. It was terribly frightening. She recovered and so did we. Bob followed through on getting that dog out of the neighborhood.
after her vet treatment
When we moved from Siesta drive to Platform street, she really came into her own. She began to think that yes, everyone could be a friend. She was convinced that certainly those visiting our house came to see just her.
Time rolled by. We loved her dearly and she in turn began to show a little affection for us. She has only barked a few times over the years, usually going many many months in between episodes. Even as a beagle she never bays or howls.
Best place to be if a thunderstorm occurs!
She is like my silent companion until we put her on a leash. Then she becomes the nose on legs. She has grown front shoulders like a football player and can hold her place while she reads her “pee-mail.”
About a year ago she began to show some pain in one back leg. Then it subsided and we thought no more about it. We did get her canine glucosamine chondroitin tablets. We bought a new couch and put a fabric cover on it. Her favorite place has always been lying on the couch and we allow that. She asks for so little.
I’ve taken to calling her “Beagley-beag.” She is also known as Luck-Luck and a variety of other terms of endearment. I talk to her throughout the day. If we have been gone from the house a few hours she greets us with little whines as if to ask, “Where have you been?” If we had reason to kennel her while we were away she comes out of her crate giving us a piece of her mind. It sounds like, “How dare you? Don’t you know I will be good?” She knows how to bawl us out without a single bark.
When I had shoulder surgery in January she would sometimes want to get up on the couch and had difficulty doing it. She would even cry for me to pick her up but I was unable to lift her while wearing the sling for 6 weeks. I made her a pillow bed on the floor. Occasionally she would screw up her courage and jump up on the couch. That became more and more rare.
She needed a bordetella injection and I was concerned about her refusal to jump up, so I took her to a new vet in March as the other vet had stopped offering boarding and gone corporate. The new vet put her on two medications for her leg pain and asked that she come in for more blood work before they would refill the one Rx. They wanted x-rays of her legs. We refused the x-rays as we do not plan to submit her to surgery.
When we went to the Smoky Mountains in April we boarded her with our granddaughter who likely takes more indulgent care of her than we do! We were shocked when we returned after 4 days. She had declined drastically. She could barely walk. When she did walk she held her tail with a strange bend in it as if trying to improve her balance. Whereas in the past this dog always had to be on a leash or she would take off, now we could drop the leash in the yard and she would not move. A couple times I took her out to “do her business” and she would just lie down. Bob used to walk her about a mile every morning. Now she can barely make it three doors down the street and back.
I began to grieve sensing that her time on earth without suffering had passed. I know, I have messed up this blog with past tense and present tenses all intermingled. Suffice it to say it is just simply difficult to write this out.
We decided to return to the vet that we had left. They have treated her the entire time she has been in our care. They agreed that she is definitely suffering. They offered a monthly injection for osteoarthritis (which the other vet had offered, too). We decided to try it for one or two months to see it is improves her particular condition. The vet says the problem seems to be in her back “knees.” We are weaning her off one medication. Once that is out of her system they might try a steroid medication if she still has not improved from the injection.
The quote at the top of this blog set me off on this telling. Here are a few of the bare bones of my grieving. I never mean to get attached to our pets, yet I do and I love them freely. I have a better understanding now of why farmers say they do not want animals in the house. Once you name them, and house them, and live day-to-day with them it is that much harder to let them go when the time comes.
One neighbor said she wished her 12 year old Corgi could just out live her. Too hard to let go. Another said it is not fair that they die while in our care. I do not want to embrace the alternative of not having a pet. Bob has stressed repeatedly how difficult it is at our ages (read 70’s) to walk and care for a pet. This particular beagle refused to just go outside and “do her business.” She insists on being walked. So there is the conundrum of what to do when she passes. Bob said I can have another dog I really want one. I know if we get another it would need to be half of Lucky’s weight. At 27 pounds she is just too heavy for me to carry.
April 2024 sunbathing on the back deck and favoring that one leg though both now pain her
Recently the Lord reminded me that Lucky is on loan to us. I will try my best to trust the Holy One with her future. I am praying for grace and strength to release her peacefully when it is time. Watching her suffer is so very difficult.
A righteous man has kind regard for the life of his animal, But even the compassion of the wicked is cruel.
Recently I met with my best friend from childhood for a 2 hour lunch. We talked about everything under the sun including what is most important to us in our lives right now. I spoke about writing this blog. I spoke about editing my poetry. She spoke about how much I need to get involved in a program in Cincinnati called Women Writing for a Change. (Evidently they offer the program in other areas of the country, too.) I’ve known about this program for years. I have a major objection and a minor one.
The minor one is that there is a charge. The major one is much larger. Let’s discuss moving out of your comfort zone. In my family of origin the #1 method of control was criticism. Constant, unrelenting criticism over anything and everything I ever did. And nothing was ever forgiven or forgotten. When there was any opportunity for criticism the past was dredged up and gone over, rehearsed, rehashed again as if it had just happened this week. One of the tenets of writing groups is, as I understand it, sharing your work for input from others. OUCH! I do not believe I could ever risk taking what is so valuable to me and asking others for their input. That’s likely why I like the blog.
One day while driving to another part of town I was listened to a radio program called One-A on public radio. They were discussing a book I had never heard of. One Thousand Words: A Writer’s Guide to Staying Creative, Focused, and Productive All Year Round by Jami Attenberg. I did not want to listen, but I was drawn in. Jut like the “Lookie-loos” at a highway accident I had to know what this book was about. It stressed content for those who are writing a book, but I am just interested in being a better writer, I argued. They repeated more than once the importance of sharing your work with other writers who can help you improve your work. I cringed at the very thought. The book is new, so it was not at the library yet or available used at my favorite place, Abe Books. I ordered it that evening from Amazon.
While I waited for it to come I took the challenge of writing 1,000 words. I mean, how hard could it be? I chose a story from 1954 during my childhood. My first mistake was thinking they meant write 10,000 words. Have I ever mentioned that numbers are not my strong suit?
After I got finished writing my dislike for all of this, I began rolling along. Frustrated at the word count I put it away for a day. Next day I realized my mistake in the number of words required. I edited out my complaining and got to work at trying to finish the vignette. I was able to accomplish the piece.
On Tuesday my same friend sent me information about a free introductory class on Core Groups for Women Writing for a Change. (Core groups are the small groups organized for the writers.) Okay, I did it. Signed up for a free Thursday morning class in May. Oi-yoi-yoi. What have I done?
One of my favorite words is oy. Yes, it’s an exclamation of disappointment, dismay or exasperation, but it’s also many other things.
We use oy when things aren’t going so well. It seems older Jews use it much more than younger Jews, perhaps because they always have a pain somewhere.
Oy-yoi-yoi-yoi-yoi-yoi-yoi (or any multi-syllabic utterance of the term) suggests a more lasting discomfort. Oy vey suggests that things are “hitting the fan”; it says this is not your average oy.
The book has arrived. It includes “wisdom and inspiration from more than fifty beloved writers.” Sure hope they can help me move forward with this experiment. Wonder if they are up for the task of overcoming many years of criticism. Maybe, just maybe I will hit my stride and surprise myself?
Psalm 27 was one of my favorites as a teenager and into my early adult years. It applies now, too.
The Lord is my light and my salvation; whom shall I fear? The Lord is the stronghold of my life; of whom shall I be afraid?
For my father and my mother have forsaken me, but the Lord will take me up.
I believe that I shall see the goodness of the Lord in the land of the living! Wait for the Lord; be strong, and let your heart take courage; yea, wait for the Lord!
My friend, Debbie, told me about a free app called “Merlin.” https://merlin.allaboutbirds.org/ Cornell labs developed it and I just love it! Pictured below is how the screen looks for Merlin.
Years ago Bob and I went on a birding adventure with the Cincinnati Nature Center in the Lake Erie area. We were surrounded on a boardwalk by people from many areas. The birds were mostly high in the treetops. Even with binoculars I was unable to see most of them. The birdsong was glorious! I was very humbled when the Amish children walking with us were able to identify the birds by their song. Yes I live in an industrialized society. Sadly most of us lost touch with that sort of skill. I was taught to identify some spring wildflowers but never to identify bird song. Bob and I were not shamed as much as amazed at the abilities of those children!
Shout for joy to God, all the earth! 2 Sing the glory of his name; make his praise glorious. 3 Say to God, “How awesome are your deeds! So great is your power that your enemies cringe before you. 4 All the earth bows down to you; they sing praise to you, they sing the praises of your name.”
Psalm 66:1-4 NIV
I have my morning prayer and meditation in my bedroom next to a south facing window. One recent morning the serenade was amazing. There were so many birds that I asked the Merlin App to identify who was singing. Twelve different birds! What a wonder and a blessing. Here is the list the app created:
Carolina Wren
Northern Cardinal
House Finch
Tufted Titmouse
American Robin
Song Sparrow
Blue Jay
Brown-headed Cowbird
Canada Goose
Carolina Chickadee
White-throated Sparrow
Red-winged Blackbird
Along with the bird names that were linked with the songs there were photos. I could click on any one of them and get more details.
I know there are many folks who do not like modern technology. I am not saying that all of it is unequivocally good. But to me, this one app is absolutely amazing! Sparrows abound in our neck of the state. So did I see the one pictured above or this one?
So many sparrows, so little time. Will I ever learn to identify all of them by sight? If not, I have Merlin to aid me.
Are not five sparrows sold for two pennies? Yet not one of them is forgotten by God. 7 Indeed, the very hairs of your head are all numbered. Don’t be afraid; you are worth more than many sparrows.
Luke 12:6-7 NIV
The April 15 New Yorker just arrived. Here is the cover artwork!
Recently I attended a soul collage one day retreat led by Mooydeen Frees, retired Deacon of the Episcopal church and so many other titles and skills. She shared this blessing written by Jan Richardson. I was so moved that I want to share it with you, too. I pray you will read it once. And then read it again prayerfully with yourself in mind.
Blessing the Body
The blessing takes one look at you and all it can say is holy.
Holy hands, Holy face, Holy feet, Holy everything In between.
Holy even in pain. Holy even when weary. In brokenness, holy. In shame, holy still.
Holy in delight. Holy in Distress. Holy when being born. Holy when we lay it down at the hour of our death.
So friend, Open your eyes (holy eyes). For one moment see what this blessing sees, this blessing that knows how you have been formed and knit together in wonder and in love.
Welcome this blessing that folds its hands in prayer when it meets you; receive this blessing that wants to kneel in reverence before you; you who are temple, sanctuary, home for God in this world.
Isn’t that wonderful? Jan Richardson is new to me but I would say she certainly has a ministry writing blessings! “The blessing takes one look at you and all it can say is holy.”
Regardless of what you may think of yourself at times; regardless of what the accuser says about you, know that God loves you always. Are you willing to align your thinking with His?
But thanks be to God, who gives us the victory through our Lord Jesus Christ.
The bluebells seemed to have died. Then this spring they jumped up in splendid life! The first flower formed and I was delighted. A couple days later the flower had been eaten. Another flower formed and I hoped the first tasted nasty and no one would return to eat this one. Well, either it tasted good or another garden visitor took a taste because that flower is gone now, too!
Remember my disappointment that the bulbs I planted came up as crocuses? Well, I was SO WRONG! Seems I planted the chionodoxa bulbs on top of crocus bulbs, (so hard to remember where everything is underground in November). After the crocus, the Chionodoxa bloomed and they are lovely!
In autumn the trees delight me with multicolored leaves. This spring seems especially nice as the treetops are “laced” with blooms of various colors.
The sad news is the beagle, Lucky, seems to get more lame. The vet wants to do x-rays and blood work which last week cost $90. She says the last medication made her liver values worse. We are uncertain exactly how old she is, 7 or more years? We do not want her to be in pain, but we also do not treat our animals as if they were human in terms of medical care.
We took her to the woods with us for a romp. After a little bit, I was afraid we might need to carry her back to the car. She could not jump over small fallen branches and trees as in the past. She was obviously suffering. Oh my heart misses her already. She is my companion and has her quirks as she is a rescue, but what to do for her? Yellow lace, red lace, so much joy!
Walking in the woods I found little yellow bud covers / cases and wondered what they were from? Then a few more steps and I found this broken branch.
There was not a naturalist in the State Park office, but the women working there took a photo and sent it to one. Later that day I got an email stating this is a male Eastern Cottonwood! I was amazed. I used to wait for a ride to high school under a cottonwood tree and never once saw this! We have walked under cottonwoods in New Mexico, too.
For everything there is a season, and a time for every]purpose under heaven: 2 a time to be born, and a time to die; a time to plant, and a time to pluck up that which is planted; 3 a time to kill, and a time to heal; a time to break down, and a time to build up; 4 a time to weep, and a time to laugh; a time to mourn, and a time to dance; 5 a time to cast away stones, and a time to gather stones together; a time to embrace, and a time to refrain from embracing; 6 a time to seek, and a time to lose; a time to keep, and a time to cast away; 7 a time to rend, and a time to sew; a time to keep silence, and a time to speak; 8 a time to love, and a time to hate; a time for war, and a time for peace.
It was a grand sunny day, though the wind remained cold. We had a morning with nothing planned for us! I had heard of a relatively new bakery called Clarity House, Bakery and Tea Room. Mention bakery to Bob and we are off on a field trip!
The bakery was cozy and welcoming. The soft ginger cookie enticed me! He ordered the blueberry scone. When we go out in the morning I often have to find a restroom as I declare, “Morning coffee, coming through!” This day was no exception. As I followed the instructions from the waitress I happened on a room with 5 women having a Bible study. I asked what they were studying. There was a pause and one answered “Jesus!” One Bible was opened the Isaiah and another to Timothy. I went along to use the facilities. When I emerged I noticed an area devoted to leaving prayer requests on tags. Bunches had been filled out. Very nice!
As we got back in the car we pondered what to do next. Montgomery is very close to Kenwood where our local Trader Joe’s is located. We had been there the week before and the dark chocolate bars I wanted for the physical therapists were on back order. The clerk assured me he would have them in 2 or 3 days. I told him I usually only visited once a month or less. Bob suggested we return there to see if the chocolate was in. In fact, it was in and I purchased it for our cupboard and the PT team.
Kenwood is just down the road from Silverton. We have tried multiple times to buy from Silverton Donuts. We arrived there to find a sign on the door that they would not be open for a couple days. Drats! We started to wonder if we would have to get up before sunrise to try their tasty treats!
Well since we were in the area we stopped at Esther Price candies. The older folks around here have been searching for “Hummingbird Eggs.” This candy is like tiny drops of cream candy. No one seems to make them anymore. Esther Price did not either. All the rest of their candy was stocked for the coming Easter celebration. We bought ourselves a solid dark chocolate rabbit. Then Bob spotted the individual candies. They reminded us so much of See’s Candy in California. They do not make vanilla walnut fudge (drats, my favorite), but the chocolates sounded divine! Bob decided on a mixed 8 ounce box. The cashier said we had the best person packing the box. When we asked why she told us, “She always puts in some extra pieces!” Sure enough she added 2 “turtles” chocolate over caramel and pecans. Oh goodness. We each ate half a turtle in the car.
Since the kids are grown and the oldest grandkids no longer seem interested in candy and certainly not Resurrection Sunday, we decided to just celebrate among ourselves, like before the kids came along. On the way home I pondered how much fun it would be to display our candy on the china layer plates that our daughter had replaced for us. When we moved I packed the display dish my mother loved and this move one of her plates broke. I chose to keep the Esther Price chocolates in the cupboard for just the two of us.
Another item missing from the Easter candy displays this year is pastel candy corn. I thought perhaps it might take the place of hummingbird eggs? Bob decided we should stop at Supreme Nut and Candy company to see if they carried it. Just a few more miles down the road right at the freeway exit. Why not? Nope. They did not have any this year. My usual evening snack that is crunchy and low carb means 2 caramel rice cakes. I have found they are extra tasty with a little bit of candy corn! So we bought regular candy corn to refill the jar!
You may remember the trip to the Amish country where we spotted the feeder pig barn.?
Fitting to keep this photo next to the candy!
At times I challenge Bob that we eat our way through a vacation. This time it was a tasty road trip. Most everything made it home without any bites missing.
When I am trying to cope with unrelenting pain I often tell Bob it is as if I am being ground to powder. Reading Elisabeth Elliot’s book A Path Through Suffering I was blessed by her paraphrase of Job 7:19, 10:8-9.
Can’t you take your eyes off me? Won’t you leave me alone long enough to swallow my spit? You shaped me and made me; now you’ve turned to destroy me. You kneaded me like clay, now you’re grinding me to a powder.
Elisabeth Elliot
Unless you have endured pain that will not let up, no matter what you do or medication you may swallow, you might not get the idea of being ground to powder. It is as if every fiber of your being that was once solid, is being changed to powder, without substance, mere dust.
Early in my diagnosis of chronic illness I came across this quote. It has helped me endure some hours of ceaseless pain, turning loose of my clenched senses and releasing myself to the loving light of my Savior.
O God, grant that I may understand that it is You who are painfully parting the fibers of my being in order to penetrate to the very marrow of my substance and bear me away within Yourself. -Teilhard de Chardin, SJ
Teilhard de Chardin
While reading the last few days I was reminded (I do not remember in which book) that from dust we came and to dust we will return. Of course, you remember that Jesus also performed a miraculous healing by spitting and mixing it with dust, then rubbing it on a man’s eyes. (John 9) So why not use dust to awaken me to His presence and power even in the midst of pain. Even if it be the dust I call myself?
When you feel as if life is grinding you down to a powder how do you respond? Or do you just react? Elisabeth says of Job on page 52 “A living proof of a living faith was required, not only for Job’s friends, but for unseen powers in high places. Job’s suffering provided the context for a demonstration of trust. … To us who have the New Testament, it would seem that Job had very little to go on, yet he kept on talking to God.”
Job kept on talking to God, even when things looked bleak. In Job 13:15a Job declared, “Though He slay me, yet will I trust Him.” Have you come to that extent of trust? Have you placed your all on the altar and left it there for God to use as He sees fit?
I had a friend named Char. She was slowly dying of lung cancer. I met her when I was giving a series of group lessons in crochet. She wanted to speak to me alone. We met several times at her house. One thing she really wanted the answer to had to do with prayer. She told me she talked to God all day long about everything. She asked me if she was “doing prayer right.” I assured her that nothing would please the Father more than to be included in every aspect of our life. Elliot pointed out that “Job kept on talking to God.” Are you continually talking to God? Do you invite Him in to your thoughts and activities throughout the day? Once your morning prayers and devotionals are over are you finished with God?
If I let myself feel the pain will I become intoxicated with the pain? Overwhelmed by the pain will my life then become JUST PAIN with no other sensation, value, or purpose? Will I be consumed with gauging the pain sitting in the pain walking in the pain? All my perceptions dulled except to pain under pain in pain pain through and through pain behind me ahead of me pain on all sides of me pain above me beneath me life reduced to pain in every cell pain Sleeplessness because of pain Restless when sleeping due to pain
If I acknowledge the pain will I have fortitude and courage to live beyond the pain, Somehow given grace to override the pain, not censor it ignore it deny it but live a life in the midst of pain always haunted by pain? Pain of bone deterioration, random muscle pain, unwarranted from any strain or excess.
Pain my life drugged or not my partner companion in my genes product of ancestral history or just misfortune?
For years my life has been pain denial pain drugs pain hope pain drained-of-hope pain denial I am afraid that no, the pain will never end, or, even worse, the pain will increase envelop, dictate, control my life.
There, I've written it. Many marvel that I'm so busy try to accomplish so much. They are not acquainted with my relentless task master who drives me on with fear that my capacity to accomplish anything will one day be diminished to near zero.
Jesus awoke in the boat and said, "Why are you so afraid?"
Yet then, through Him, I'll arise a phoenix intercessor on behalf of God's children engaged perhaps in the biggest battle of life to date. A supreme calling more valuable than my do-ings. With bones cracking, muscles aching, nerves shooting red hot signals to nowhere and everywhere outer body diminishing while inner woman draws upon her experience with the living, dynamic, omnipotent Father and she is renewed, remade in His image, inhabited daily, hourly, in every cell of her being by Holy Spirit overshadowed, indwelt in spite of all this carnal container can develop - a woman of God passing through journeying towards home where all sorrow, all tears, and all pain will be no more. Forever inhabited by Holy Spirit in rapturous adoration of His glory peace and mercy. Even so, Lord Jesus, I offer myself a living sacrifice unto You. Renew my mind according to the word and transform even this pain.
The ogre crumbles, rivulets of plaster dust falling from its once daunting facade gathering in powder clumps revealing its paltry nature.
1 Peter 4:19 encourages us to "entrust yourself to your faithful Creator." I pray you and I will both do this constantly regardless of how we feel.
Treasures in Plain Sight, A Christian Blog 