Yikes

This week for me holds appointment to get new orthotics and shoes. I do not meet the medicare criteria even though diabetic. Thus, the appointment will be self-pay.

Another appointment for physical therapy. Only opening was during my writing time Tuesday. Good thing I worked ahead!

Another appointment for check up with internist. Are you getting the picture?

We have a dinner to celebrate someone turning 82.

There is an ice cream social with another small group. Figure 20 some folks.

I have been taking Imodium AGAIN this morning. Fear to eat and headache that comes with that running to the bathroom. So back to Tylenol.

So far, Monday has brought a lousy week here.

But, who me? Complain?!? Yep, that’s me.

When my son was very young I was cleaning the bathroom one day and thanked God that I could kneel before HIS throne and not just the one in the bathroom. This week I likely have the cleanest ceramic throne on the entire street!

Grateful we have good medical care and can afford (so far) the things we need to pay for out of pocket. Wish doctors were not ‘practicing” on us and actually had some answers for some of this stuff.

Grumble, grumble old lady.

I am not as hearty as I think I am.

So how did it all work out? A week after I wrote the top part here is my report . New orthotics and shoes are on order. Physical therapy was not as painful as feared. I have done the exercises every day, so far. (Trying to be good for strength and healing.) At dinner for 82 year old I ate some food though not a good appetite. Regretted it the next day.

Saw the internist. He ordered oodles of tests. All the results came back normal. WHAT?!?! So what is the cause of all these bathroom runs? Might never know. He sent Rx for stronger than Imodium drug. Before I took even one dose it all stopped occurring. Thank You Lord.

Maybe eating a sampler (or flight) of ice cream flavors healed me? If only that were true!

So 2-1/2 weeks of the green apple quick trots and I am fine now. Truly. My friend with sciatic pain is still suffering. Bob’s lungs are enjoying clear air this morning after lightning storm moved through last night. They say we are to have rain storms today. Part of me is hoping so.

Pain since Thanksgiving in shoulder is not gone, but no longer consuming all of my attention. Lifting things carefully and trying to use it more than last number of months.

Tonight is Bob’s last meeting as an HOA board member. Tomorrow he works at the election. A draining week for him for certain.

John Eldredge reminds us in Resilient that these are this we are going through. Going through – not necessarily setting up housekeeping here. I am glad to know this in not my final home. I love that Scripture calls me an alien, a sojourner.

Dear friends, since you are immigrants and strangers in the world, I urge that you avoid worldly desires that wage war against your lives. 12 Live honorably among the unbelievers. Today, they defame you, as if you were doing evil. But in the day when God visits to judge they will glorify him, because they have observed your honorable deeds.

1 Peter 2: 11-13 CEB

Immigrants and strangers, just wish the locals would not share their green apple quick trots and other ailments with us! Okay, so it is a little out of context, but you get the idea I hope!

Life is hard she shouted!

Like Breath of God

Photo by Daiga Ellaby on Unsplash

Thus am I, a feather on the breath of God.

Hildegard of Bingen

I heard this quote many years ago at a retreat. I was so inspired I actually collected feathers and made some note cards with the quote.

What does it mean? The breath of God is a powerful thing. Can you be as moveable as a loose feather? Can you be willing to go where He asks you to go?

This quote is from a blog, written by Jean Wise, (interesting name!) She was so succinct that I cannot improve on her writing!

God calls each of us to be His feather – responding to where He calls us. To be responsive to His nudges. To be open to His grace.

 I want to live as a feather. Not burdened down with the heavy concerns of my heart, but focused, surrendered, dependent entirely on God for every moment. Ah, to be a feather. What a lovely image this is.

https://healthyspirituality.org/a-feather-on-the-breath-of-god-hildegard/
Photo by Hari Singh Tanwar on Unsplash


I pray a gentle breath from God is all it takes to move me. I hope I can be a feather under His direction, doing His bidding.

Move Your Mind

Yesterday was tremendously difficult. Bob and I were both struggling with frustrating chores and situations. Then I snapped at him and things got even worse. I had to really work to get my brain and soul into a better, calmer place. There was nothing earth shattering, except great difficulty mentally and spiritually. I apologized for my outburst. He forgave me and the day went on.

This morning on a podcast I heard an interviewee tell the moderator that with his broadcast he casts a ray of sunshine on an otherwise dark network of podcasts, social media, etc. I thought, “You know, that is that is what I try to do with this blog. A ray of sunshine in an otherwise dark world.” Then I returned to my desk and lying open was the following paragraph written by John Eldredge in Resilient.

Photo by Rocco Caruso on Unsplash

Fix your thoughts on what is true, and honorable, right and pure, lovely ad admirable. Think about things that are excellent and worthy of praise (Philippians 4:8). Think about something beautiful, something that reminds you of the goodness of God. A place you love. A sweet memory. Something in nature. Something that makes you smile.

Now stay with that today.

Resilient by Eldredge Page 172

Even when things are terrible, we have the ability to move our minds to other places. We can cry out to Jesus and ask the Holy Spirit to help us. Nothing is easy when the warfare is raging against us. There are times I think for the Christian in this day and age nothing is easy period.

The chorus from the following song was rolling around in me this morning. I pray that if you come upon a warfare struggle like what I faced yesterday you can move towards Jesus and not away.

Lord I give you my heart
I give you my soul, I live for you alone
Every breath that I take
Every moment I'm awake
Lord have your way in me
Have your way
Recorded by Hillsong music, written by Reuben Timothy Morgan, 2002

Rest Here A Moment

“May I rest here a moment”, asked the tree?

“Certainly”, replied the rock.

The tree placed it’s hand-root upon the rock. Fifty years later it was still there.

Found during hike at Hocking Hills

Have you given yourself a time to rest in the LORD?

He is the rock of our salvation.

Psalm 62:6

He said to them, “Come with me privately to an isolated place and rest a while.”

Mark 6:31a NIV

Jesus our rock tells us to rest. Enter His rest. Be restored. Are we doing those things? They are all to our benefit.

My Mind

Recently I came across something that said I need a mind that is peaceful, still, serene and quiet. That led me to the idea that all those things are promised in Scripture. I would imagine you could use a mind like that also? Here are some passages and images that might help you get to that state of mind.

You will keep in perfect peace
    those whose minds are steadfast,
    because they trust in you.

Isaiah 26:3 NIV

Another version reads “Whose mind is staid on you.” Staid as in fixed. Read that again and just sit with it a moment. Those of us who are familiar with the Bible tend to run right past the verses we think we know. Can you live this verse?

The mind that is still.

He says, “Be still, and know that I am God;

Psalm 46:10a

It is easy to read or say “be still” but can you do it? Still yourself. Quiet yourself. Even sit still for an extended period of time? Dan Harris, former ABC news anchor, now heads up 10% Happier, an app based on his best selling book. He says even one or two minutes of stillness can make a huge difference. Take a pause right now to try that.

The mind that is serene. That brought me to two different passages. If you read Psalm 23 you begin to realize how serene life with the Shepherd can be. Though there may be dangers and enemies, He is able to keep His sheep. Philippians 4 with emphasis upon verse 8 came out on top though! It gives us very clear instruction about our mind and what to do with it!

 Rejoice in the Lord always. I will say it again: Rejoice! Let your gentleness be evident to all. The Lord is near. Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.

Finally, brothers and sisters, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable—if anything is excellent or praiseworthy—think about such things

Philippians 4:4-8 NIV

We CAN take captive our thoughts to Christ Jesus. No, it is not simple, but oh so very worthwhile! Think about such things!

And finally we are urged to have a mind that is quiet. It is exhausting to have a busy, busy mind. Here is help for that situation. But you must DO it.

But I have calmed and quieted myself,
    I am like a weaned child with its mother;
    like a weaned child I am content.

Psalm 131:2 NIV

Time with Jesus

Andrew Johnson has a guided meditation on the Insight Timer app entitled “Favourite Place of Relaxation.” I have used it often and usually leads me to a new place with Christ.

This time spent in guided meditation began with a gauzy gray scene, no distinct things to see; then fragrance of a banquet, then full color image of the Lord presiding and directing me to the table.

I remembered the verse “He welcomes me into His banqueting table, His banner over me is love.”

He bid me gather His finest foods, roasted meats, potatoes and onions, grapes, refreshing fruits. All for sharing with His people. All for my nourishment and growth in Spirit. I gathered them into the basket I was carrying.

He loves me. He tells me to return often. To take as much as I can carry. To be at peace knowing how much I am loved. As are you. Rest in that all encompassing love today. Feast with the Lord.


He has brought me to His banquet hall, And His banner over me is love.

Song of Solomon 2:4

The Insight Timer app is free. Click on the link if you want to try this mediation for yourself.

https://insighttimer.com/andrewjohnson/guided-meditations/favourite-place-of-relaxation

May the Lord bless you as you draw ever closer to Him in your daily life.

New Sentiment from Gratefulness

We don’t have to pretend to be fine when we are not. We don’t need to push through and be strong. Gratitude is a soft landing place that requires us to be honest, open, and willing to look at everything we’re facing and not turn away.

Alex Elle

I find that quote really powerful. The tremendous freedom in it! Gratitude “REQUIRES us to be honest, open, and willing to look at everything we’re facing and not turn away.”

A dear friend of many years suffered a fall a couple months ago. She shattered several bones. The pain was tremendous. She was hospitalized, then nursing care, then yet another nursing home/rehab situation. It must have been very hard to look at everything she was facing and not turn away. I know she was relying upon the Lord in this grueling recovery situation. The pain still has not gone, but she is coping. I did not learn about her situation until recently. I would have liked to pray for her especially during the worst of it. I know she prayed for me during the worst part of my life years ago. After that fall, the image of a soft landing place could be comforting.

This diagram was used in several other places, so I used it, too.

A neighbor recently had a bout of falling. Her son thought it was from her back pain and perhaps too many meds. She was taken by life squad to the hospital. In reality it was Addison’s disease with severe dehydration. She was in intensive care for several days. We lifted her in prayer plus her son and husband. She is hom02e now and doing well. I wonder if she knows that gratitude soft landing place?

Is the image a heart or a praying mantis face?

As I draw closer to the Holy One, unhealed things rise to the surface. Lately I have been sorting through some feelings and stumbling blocks that tend to trip me up. I have suffered emotional scarring from several situations with women over my 70+ years. Part of me says, “get over it,” and part of me says “the wounds are still there.” This wounding keeps me from engaging with other women freely. There is always a huge part of me held in reserve. Most of it began in my childhood from my family of origin. Hard to believe those wounds are present so any years later! The LORD knows all my scars and has recently helped me heal another layer. He could not help me if I turned away and refused to face the wounds.

All of this has led me to a place of deeper gratitude. Nothing in our life can be taken for granted. Also, everything can eventually become a source of praise.

“We don’t have to pretend we are fine when we are not. We don’t need to push through and be strong.” I had to ask the LORD for help.

Search me, God, and know my heart;
    test me and know my anxious thoughts.
See if there is any offensive way in me,
    and lead me in the way everlasting.

Psalm 139:23-24 NIV

Help me turn every discomfort to You. Show me the cause and help me give it to You for healing. Whether I am in pain emotionally, physically, or spiritually You know and are able to give me wisdom in each situation. If I must return to a topic 1,000 times I realize You never tire of healing and helping, guiding and growing me into the image of Jesus. I also know You are no respecter of persons; You desire to heal every person. Help us each to yield to You. Amen.

Go Outside!

When was the last time someone told you to “Go outside and play”? So often we take topics like faith so seriously that I think God is telling us to go outside and play with Him. Perhaps this is something you need? Even if your access to the outdoors is restricted by health, you can still have a playtime.

Ponder for a few moments the Scripture John 3:8. Here is the NIV version

Jesus said, “The wind blows wherever it pleases. You hear its sound, but you cannot tell where it comes from or where it is going. So it is with everyone born of the Spirit.”

Reading Sensible Shoes and Two Steps Forward by Sharon G. Brown, I found great images about play and flowers. I will retell it in my own words as I do have permission to copy large portions of the books.

Hannah (a busy Christian servant) saw herself as a child running in and out of the throne room bringing flowers to Jesus. Then later she saw herself running in and out of the throne room taking flowers from around Jesus to others. Both times He stopped her, scooped her up and wanted to just spend time with her. He also told her in the second scene that the flowers were for HER! Later in Two Steps Forward she saw a pinwheel and realized it looked like the flowers she had seen earlier.

I have a large pinwheel and several small ones in our yard. A pinwheel can sit still all day or spin frantically in a heavy breeze. It helps me ‘see’ the wind and reminds me of the Spirit of God.

In Two Steps Forward Brown wrote

“There’s nothing useful and productive about pinwheels. They serve no practical purpose. They just wait for the wind without striving. An image of receptivity. And fun. Whimsical delight and wasting time. What a growing edge for me! And to have a pinwheel combined with the image of a flower is perfect. Thank you, Lord. The flowers are for me. The Lover’s gift to the beloved.”

Hannah in Two Steps Forward by Brown

In my Transfiguration Associates fellowship group I shared these ideas and passed out pinwheels for each person. I wish I could hand one to each reader right now! I bought ours at The Dollar Store which is now $1.25! I encouraged each person to go play, (but not to put them out the window as they were driving home.) You see, that is one of my first pinwheel memories, a summer day in the car having the X-mph wind blow my pinwheel.

I encourage you to play with God this week. If you do not have a pinwheel perhaps you could make one? https://www.wikihow.com/Make-a-Pinwheel

Can you relax with God and rest in His love enough to just have fun? He has so many aspects to His personality that you will never know all of them. How about learning more about this one? Remember that when you have a fun time with an earthly friend you have a deeper bond. Just imagine how having fun with God will deepen that relationship! Go play!

God is the fountain of life. The only fountain of life. His glorious life is meant to flow through us every day – healing us, filling us with creativity, courage, joy, playfulness, and resilience. It comes through attachment, bonded love, the soul’s union with God.

John Eldredge “Resilient”

The wind is His, but He lets us see it and use it. The wind is one symbol of the Holy Spirit! Go play! The pinwheel brought all sorts of things to mind such as the song “Breathe on Me Breath Of God.” Sit with God and the wind, play and discover where He will lead you. Just don’t put your pinwheel out the car window while driving!!

J. Philip Newell

Listening to a podcast where J. Philip Newell was interviewed, he mentioned that when he teaches and/or writes he is not informing us of anything radically new on the earth. He is simply reminding us of things we already know. I pray you have found this true from reading my blog, (though it is a lofty thing to compare myself in anyway to Newell). If my words ring true from Scripture and the journey of following Jesus, then I would think there should be some familiarity to you. If you are a brand new believer or someone just exploring the faith, then perhaps not.

J Philip Newell

I took his quotes from talk #1 which begins after about 5+minutes of introduction and announcements from Rob Bell.. Here is the link https://www.earthandsoul.org/podcasts

In the interview J. Philip Newell mentioned that he had a new grandchild. When she looked him straight in the eye he was reminded of the idea that Dickens captured:

“It is no small thing, when they, who are so fresh from God, love us. ”

-Charles Dickens

Have you had a similar experience? That piercing gaze of a newborn or very young child? One so fresh from God. Many years ago my husband bought me a bookmark with that sentiment on it. At the time I had raised our children and was working as a nanny to other children. When those babies would gaze into my eyes I was deeply blessed.

There is a story that speaks about a man who went into a church everyday and sat. Finally the priest asked him was he was doing as the priest never heard the man pray. The man answered, “I look at Him. And He looks at me.”

Have you spent time just looking at the Lord and allowing Him to look at you? Could you pause more often during any day or night and turn your eyes upon the Holy One, allowing yourself to be seen, inside and out? Do you love God enough to gaze and rest and be made new with this holy looking?

I think trying it will provide your best answer.

I had a friend named Char. I met her through crochet lessons I was offering. She had lung cancer, but was determined to squeeze every single drop of life out of the time that remained for her. As she came nearer to the end of her life she asked me about prayer. She wanted to know if she was ‘doing it right.’ She said as she went about her day she spoke with Jesus about everything. I was floored. I told her that was absolutely correct as I understood Christianity. We involve God in our every thought and action and even our resting. I have been studying Brother Lawrence for years and trying to practice His presence always. Speaking to Jesus, listening for instruction and direction. Doesn’t get any better than that!

I pray you will enter into ‘continuous communion with God’. Nothing on earth will reward you like that practice!

Reading Richard Rohr

During my 6 day retreat I came across a book entitled The Naked Now, Learning to See as the Mystics See by Rohr.

He wrote:

There is absolutely nothing you can do to earn or get the Holy Spirit; there is nothing at all you can do to attain the divine indwelling. Don’t try to “believe” in the Holy Spirit as one doctrine among others. Instead, practice drawing from this deep well within you, and then you will naturally believe. Put the horse first, and it will draw the cart.”

Richard Rohr

Do you remember the New testament story when the sorcerer wanted to buy the Holy Spirit? Read Acts 8:9-25. Verse 13 says this man of Samaria believed about Jesus and was baptized. Disciples were sent to teach and anoint with laying on of hands for the baptism in the Holy Spirit. That is when trouble really began for this man. He wanted to buy the power. Peter rebuked him saying:

Peter answered: “May your money perish with you, because you thought you could buy the gift of God with money! 21 You have no part or share in this ministry, because your heart is not right before God. 22 Repent of this wickedness and pray to the Lord in the hope that he may forgive you for having such a thought in your heart.

Acts 8:20-22 NIV

Draw from the deep well of living water within you. You do not have to go to a conference or revival to get the Holy Spirit! The Spirit is given freely by the Father due to the Risen Christ. Believe and receive it. Then practice drawing from that holy well.

You might ask, “How will I know it is from God?” In almost every text I pick up from my book shelf the statement is made that if you want to be certain your relationship is with the Living God you will be required to enter silence, solitude. There are also a few tried and true ways outlined in steps.

  1. There should be a Scripture to back it up
  2. This will be something others are saying to you
  3. You will experience peace from the Lord, the peace that passes all understanding.

The enemy of God wants to mislead you, but the Father is insistent that He loves those who are His. He will protect us, guide us, lead us and deliver us safely. Jude sums it up well!

But, dear friends, remember what the apostles of our Lord Jesus Christ foretold. 18 They said to you, “In the last times there will be scoffers who will follow their own ungodly desires.” 19 These are the people who divide you, who follow mere natural instincts and do not have the Spirit.

20 But you, dear friends, by building yourselves up in your most holy faith and praying in the Holy Spirit, 21 keep yourselves in God’s love as you wait for the mercy of our Lord Jesus Christ to bring you to eternal life.

22 Be merciful to those who doubt; 23 save others by snatching them from the fire; to others show mercy, mixed with fear—hating even the clothing stained by corrupted flesh.

24 To him who is able to keep you from stumbling and to present you before his glorious presence without fault and with great joy— 25 to the only God our Savior be glory, majesty, power and authority, through Jesus Christ our Lord, before all ages, now and forevermore! Amen.

Jude 17-25 NIV

Give yourself to practice drinking from this deep well, the holy drink from the Holy Spirit. Be amazed at how God can work in and through you.