Recently we were watching a PBS series entitled Southern Storytellers. Online synopsis reads, “Southern creators of literature, music and film explore deep ties with the South: Billy Bob Thornton reflects on a life of writing songs and screenplays; Adia Victoria celebrates music and marriage near Nashville; David Joy laments the loss of the Appalachian culture he loves; Jericho Brown reveals the South to be essential to his creativity; and Mary Steenburgen remembers her Arkansas childhood.”
We thoroughly enjoyed each person’s story. I especially liked Mary Steenburgen’s song that she wrote for her husband, Ted Danson. I share it here with you and ask that you remember Bob Dutina, my husband of 52 years and 9 months, so far! He is a fabulous husband indeed!
The photo above is entitled Barbie Evolves. At first Barbie was just a fashion doll.
Yes, I had one as a child. I thought it was sort of creepy. I knew I would never look like THAT! Listening to a radio program recently that reviewed the new movie with the writer and producer they mentioned that before Barbie there were basically only baby dolls for girls to pretend with. Suddenly there was a teenage doll girls could aspire to be like.
Barbie Career Dolls
Her clothes were extremely difficult to put on and take off. Her bust-line combined with that waistline was going to be unattainable for most girls. I eventually figured some man must have created her.
When my granddaughters were growing up I was given a pattern to crochet for Barbie clothes. I kept a damaged doll for fitting in case I had to make some. Then I hid the pattern hoping they would never find it. Literally, did not want to make those things, but did not want to have to buy the pattern either if they requested some clothes.
The radio program told about how the designer at first sent the doll back to Japan again and again because they kept making her with nipples and the toy designer did not want nipples. After many attempts the Japanese designers got the idea. The commentator also made the remark that Barbie was made of plastic and therefore will be around for centuries in landfills!-
So all this time I am listening and walking the beagle. At times we take a short cut from the retention pond along the edge of the neighborhood back to the street. There is a man who lives there who had a lovely pine tree. For some reason he wanted it cut down. When Ryan builders would not do it, and the HOA board would not do it (the tree was clearly on his property) he decided to do it himself. We all scratched our heads over the why? since it appeared to be in good health. So I am walking Lucky, listening to the radio interview and I pass his wood pile. I stopped abruptly and took the photo below.
Launched in 1959 by the Mattel toy company right here in Cincinnati my life has been surrounded by Barbie and her fellow character dolls. If you raised boys you likely were shielded from her unless they had girls to play with. In that case, they likely wanted a Ken doll or G I Joe? That leads to an entire other conversation about dolls who are not anatomically correct!
We don’t have to pretend to be fine when we are not. We don’t need to push through and be strong. Gratitude is a soft landing place that requires us to be honest, open, and willing to look at everything we’re facing and not turn away.
Alex Elle
I find that quote really powerful. The tremendous freedom in it! Gratitude “REQUIRES us to be honest, open, and willing to look at everything we’re facing and not turn away.”
A dear friend of many years suffered a fall a couple months ago. She shattered several bones. The pain was tremendous. She was hospitalized, then nursing care, then yet another nursing home/rehab situation. It must have been very hard to look at everything she was facing and not turn away. I know she was relying upon the Lord in this grueling recovery situation. The pain still has not gone, but she is coping. I did not learn about her situation until recently. I would have liked to pray for her especially during the worst of it. I know she prayed for me during the worst part of my life years ago. After that fall, the image of a soft landing place could be comforting.
This diagram was used in several other places, so I used it, too.
A neighbor recently had a bout of falling. Her son thought it was from her back pain and perhaps too many meds. She was taken by life squad to the hospital. In reality it was Addison’s disease with severe dehydration. She was in intensive care for several days. We lifted her in prayer plus her son and husband. She is hom02e now and doing well. I wonder if she knows that gratitude soft landing place?
Is the image a heart or a praying mantis face?
As I draw closer to the Holy One, unhealed things rise to the surface. Lately I have been sorting through some feelings and stumbling blocks that tend to trip me up. I have suffered emotional scarring from several situations with women over my 70+ years. Part of me says, “get over it,” and part of me says “the wounds are still there.” This wounding keeps me from engaging with other women freely. There is always a huge part of me held in reserve. Most of it began in my childhood from my family of origin. Hard to believe those wounds are present so any years later! The LORD knows all my scars and has recently helped me heal another layer. He could not help me if I turned away and refused to face the wounds.
All of this has led me to a place of deeper gratitude. Nothing in our life can be taken for granted. Also, everything can eventually become a source of praise.
“We don’t have to pretend we are fine when we are not. We don’t need to push through and be strong.” I had to ask the LORD for help.
Search me, God, and know my heart; test me and know my anxious thoughts. See if there is any offensive way in me, and lead me in the way everlasting.
Psalm 139:23-24 NIV
Help me turn every discomfort to You. Show me the cause and help me give it to You for healing. Whether I am in pain emotionally, physically, or spiritually You know and are able to give me wisdom in each situation. If I must return to a topic 1,000 times I realize You never tire of healing and helping, guiding and growing me into the image of Jesus. I also know You are no respecter of persons; You desire to heal every person. Help us each to yield to You. Amen.
Most of my life my mother worked at a florist in Norwood, Ohio called Dorl & Fern. I met Mr. Dorl a few times. For years my mother told my sister and I how much she wanted to visit the Hawaiian islands in order to see the flowers. (Also, her only sister lived there.) Many times the arrangement designers in the shop would use flowers shipped from Hawaii. She was delighted with those arrangements. She especially like the idea of orchids growing along tree trunks. There was much delight as she worked with the local California florist to design my wedding bouquet. Sadly, she died before she was able to go to Hawaii.
Our wedding 1970
When we were planning our visit to Hawaii (the Big Island) and Maui we told our friends Dan and Betty that we definitely wanted to see the flowers. They directed us to the Botanical Garden just north of Hilo, officially called the Hawaii Tropical Bioreserve & Garden.
The folder they gave us when we paid our admission describes the place as “a garden in a valley on the ocean.” The land is ‘held in reserve for future conservation, protecting the beautiful Onomea Bay forever.’
I was not disappointed. The beginning of the trail was a downhill boardwalk among fascinating plants, many of which we had never seen before. We were also entertained by tiny colorful geckos along the way.
Anthurium I have seen in floral shops in Ohio but never in lavender!
Geckos often lose their tail when fighting, but can grow them back!
“Pink Maracas”
Bob and I were amazed later when we compared our photos. Some were duplicates and some were things the other had not noticed. My photos of the orchids were the most abundant of all the photos I took. If you are familiar with house plants you may see some growing in the photos. So here is photo album of my still shots. By the time I would learn to make a video from still shots I could likely write 3 blog entries. Hard to teach old dogs new tricks!
If you paste the link below into your browser you can see slides from the garden posted on the Bioreserve website. Sadly, they do not identify the plants.
And then there were the orchids! You have most likely seen orchids in grocery store floral departments or big box discount stores. They are nothing like these orchids!!
See photo to rightOrchid rooted on treeWhat we know as house plant called Peace Lily.Anthurium rooted on tree truckBob’s favorite orchid on treeI do not know all the namesrooted some place on that tree!delicate colorsSplatter painted?Splotched white area unlike belowMy thumb is to show you how tiny this one is!Not identical to white ones above.
Okay, so by then I was weeping. Truly weeping over the beauty my mother missed. Weeping over the beauty of God’s creation and how He arranged for us to have the privilege to see it. I swear at one point it was as if the man who walked away from me in the garden resembled Ted Dorl. I cried because in some way this has been a deep link with my memory of my mother. And now, I had completed it. We sat on a bench while I tried to compose myself. Two women walking past surely looked bewildered by my tears. Bob gladly indulged me while I walked among the orchids again, then I found more plants and started taking photos all over again.
My Christmas tree wishLook closely!There she is, tucked away!At first glance looks like a pansy to me!
You know how people print photos on mugs and phone cases and all sorts of things? I think I want this printed like that!
The flight over the volcano was stunning along with flying over the coast and the waterfalls, but this is my best memory. It was hard for me to leave. It was getting very hot and humid. I was wrung out from the emotional experience. Rarely have I felt so close to my mom since she passed. Our daughter turns 48 this week. That means mom died 48 years and two weeks ago. May she be surrounded by Jesus and flowers in all of heaven!
The earth is the Lord’s and all that is in it, the world, and those who live in it, for he has founded it on the seas and established it on the rivers.
This came up in my email today. The same sentiment arose another time and I can’t recall where!
Whatever may be the tensions and the stresses of a particular day, there is always lurking close at hand the trailing beauty of forgotten joy or unremembered peace.
Howard Thurman
“Trailing beauty of forgotten joy or unremembered peace.” With the smoke from the Nova Scotia fires moving into the Cincinnati area and the air quality index indicating the air is dangerous for those with compromised health issues it has been a rough time at our house.
My husband has COPD and, like me with my health issues, sometimes lives in a high state of denial. (COPD stands for chronic obstructive pulmonary disease.) The week of June 11-17 was exceptionally bad. Bob has had difficulty getting accustomed to the fact that the air quality index warnings have to do with him. It seemed that each day his symptoms got worse. Finally on Friday evening, June 16th, he crashed into his chair and knew he was ill. We were outdoors for a part of the day on the 17th for a celebration of life memorial for a friend of his. We went home and I locked him in the house. He likely should have seen a doctor on the 15th, but did not. By Sunday evening he knew he had to contact the doctor on Monday morning for at minimum steroids and antibiotics. I was convinced the doctor was likely to admit him to the hospital, though he did not.
The doctor got him in. Put him on steroids and told him if there was no improvement, antibiotics were next. Sent us home.
During that time I did lots of praying and lifting. The Lord told me I needed to yield to Him, too. I was shocked when I returned from retreat how very, very anxious I became about Bob’s health situation. Listening to the voice of the Spirit I realized why.
I had gone from trusting the Lord implicitly during the retreat to anxious and worried. How did that happen so quickly? I was reminded that my Dad had been chronically ill for years with heart disease. (There are many tales about that I could write, but not today.) I grew up living on edge about his condition. At ten and younger I did not quite understand that his condition would be fatal. My husband almost succumbed to flu in 2018. That is when his COPD went from mild to more severe.
Mayo Clinic online says, “COPD symptoms include breathing difficulty, cough, mucus (sputum) production and wheezing.” There were times I could hear Bob’s lungs rattle with wheezing from across the room. His cough became so severe and prolonged that I wondered if he would bring up part of a lung instead of just mucus. Sunday evening his breathing was fast and very shallow. One night he must have coughed in his sleep. I, too, was asleep; however, I came straight up out of the bed thinking he had fallen. He was asleep in the bed. The LORD spoke to me that my anxiety was linked to that childhood experience of my father’s heart disease and subsequent early death. (At the time he was 46 yrs. old, I was 11 yrs. old.) I am no longer that child. The Spirit helped me recognize this and release that childhood scarring to my heavenly Father.
So as Monday morning came I was listening to the LORD, praying, releasing my fears, declaring to God that whatever happened at the medical office my heart was in His hand. I am sorry to report that my praise over the doctor not hospitalizing Bob was not as robust as my praise before the appointment thanking God for giving us good medical care. I think I had braced myself and was not quite certain what to do in the aftermath. Isn’t that sad?
We went out to lunch at his favorite place. Visited the pharmacy for the new medication. Came home, tended to housekeeping duties and took our rest. He was still very sick. That afternoon when my watch rang for the afternoon alert to bring my attention back to Christ, I gave thanks that we were working together on vacation photos and other office matters. I confessed my shame at not being more grateful immediately after the appointment.
This morning he decided to text the doctor as his sputum was no longer clear. Doctor had said that would indicate need for antibiotics. Bob did all of that before I was out of bed! This round of denial is certainly over.
“Trailing beauty of forgotten joy or unremembered peace.” Beauty – we went out to lunch. Were able to celebrate our recent vacation to Hawaii and not get swamped by fears about the illness. Unremembered peace – relief as I texted two people who were praying as we went to the doctor. We each think sending him home was good news.
Having ridden this roller coaster so recently I am trying to maintain an even attitude towards this illness. When he was intubated in 2018 the doctor told me that COPD can ‘turn on a dime’ meaning someone with this illness can go from sick to extremely ill in no time at all. That makes it hard to suspend my fears and hesitation. I am determined though, ‘with God’s help.”
Even to your old age and gray hairs I am he, I am he who will sustain you. I have made you and I will carry you; I will sustain you and I will rescue you.
Isaiah 46:4 NIV
Today (June 28) the air quality is again dangerous. We have closed up the house and are praying this does not exacerbate his symptoms. Stay well!
Hope is radical openness for surprise – for the unimaginable. If that is the attitude with which we look, listen, and open all our senses, we enter into a meaningful relationship with whatever Life offers us at a given moment.
Br. David Steindl-Rast
Oh my! We had no idea that most of the island has black lava, was populated upon black and brown lava. Guess we never really thought about it. There are wild goats populating that lava. They are feral and out of control. Scrub that reminded me a bit of the high desert in New Mexico?
We were in a bit of shock with the radical time change of 6+ hours. There are road signs about donkeys crossing, but we never saw any and began calling them ghost donkeys.
Well, I am home now. The laundry is mostly finished. The garden has gone wild with maple shoots. The ferns have escaped the garden bed. There are bills to be paid. Receipts to put away. Oh my goodness! The landscaping company that was supposed to take care of the lawns in this neighborhood quit and the grass has reseeded. Lucky does not quite know what to make of grass seeds hitting her in the face? The new company is here this morning and the machines are roaring.
Okay, I think maybe I have some other things that require my attention here before I try to focus and write this blog!
We saw bananas growing on the trees. Crops that we were grateful were labeled: limes, oranges, lemons, etc. Coffee trees and macadamia nut groves.
I will try in the days to come to write about all of these.
I am so grateful to God – Mahalo! (thank you) – we were kept safe from physical harm. I got a couple bug bites, but no big deal! We were smart enough to recognize our limitations. Mourned a bit that we did not have the strength and stamina to snorkel. Wished we had made the trip 10-15 years ago, but that was not to be. Kept our sunscreen on. Saw many folks with sunburn. They actually inspired me to be careful and not envious. Amazing how the dermatologist inspired me, too, by cutting that thing I could not discern off my arm last winter.
Our mighty God traveled with us, met us there, and kept us in all of our activities and decisions not to participate in some things. All praise to His mighty name for ever! Mahalo, Lord, mahalo!!
According to Travel and Leisure, the word mahalo is a Hawaiian word used in all parts of Hawaii by Hawaiians to mean thank you and express gratitude. This word is often used as a greeting to express esteem, praise or admiration, or as a compliment with sincerity in every day life. You might say mahalo in return for delicious food if the good food really stuck you. The word mahalo is three syllables – mah-hah-loh . Mahalo nui loa means thank you very much.
The word mahalo is more than just a thank you in Hawaiian thinking, It is a divine blessing on a spiritual level with a deeper meaning. This is used in everyday life and also on special occasions like the birthday of an elder or for sacredness like prayers or single-word blessings. Use this word respectfully.
Remember Brody the flour covered dog? He got a date to prom!
This is that very long legged hound, if you recall from previous post!
Here is Ellie in her gown
And with her proud parents!
I was hoping the poppies I bought would bloom before we departed. The first one was orange and I hooray-ed! The second one was yellow and I was delighted!
And yes, spring warmth has finally arrived complete with humidity and emerging ferns!
I bought one fern in 1985. We have shared so many ferns off of the original plant. I have given the root away to friends and now we have them growing nicely at this our third and likely final house!!
Suitcases are packed. Laundry is done. Ride to airport arranged. Cannot believe it is finally time to go! We deliver Lucky to Lizzie tomorrow. Our house sitters are all set up. Woo-Hoo! Happy 52+ wedding anniversary to us!!
Give thanks to the Lord, for He is good; His love endures forever.
Psalm 118:1 NIV
Give thanks to the Lord, for He is good. His love endures forever.
Psalm 136:1 NIV
And let His people say Amen! And let the Robert Dutina family say Amen! Let all God’s people say Amen!
When you read this we are packing to go to Maui tomorrow! I am stunned writing these details. 🙂
Wowsers! This year has flown past. We attended our Grandgirl’s last volleyball club tournament yesterday. Seems we just attend her first game in elementary school – or was that middle school? Well, no matter, she actually graduates in a few weeks! She will go on to play with University of Cincinnati Clermont campus volleyball team. First though is Senior prom and graduation!
I bought a pot of Asian lilies and planted them in the front garden. A sharp wind during a rainstorm one day broke off one stem of blooms. A bird had also perched in the tree above the lilies and decorated the blossoms with its waste. Yuck. Somehow in all the Scriptures about the lilies of the field and the flowers of the earth to my knowledge that event is never mentioned! Imagine.
on kitchen counterstem broke off this front edge
By the time you read this we will have landed in Hawaii for our trip of a lifetime! Our one and only visit to the 50th State. We had planned to go in 2020 for our 50th wedding anniversary and our 50th state to visit. The pandemic cancelled that. At that time Hawaii said “You can come but you have to quarantine for 2 weeks.” We can barely afford ten days in Hawaii much less 24! So our trip is finally underway. Married 52 years now!
My mother always wanted to visit to see the flowers growing there, but she died having never been there. Her sister also lived there. I have two cousins living in Lihue, but we will not be able to see them. The commuter flight between islands is $115 per person. We plan to visit Hawaii and Maui. They live on Kauai.
I can barely believe we are actually going. I typed out our itinerary spelling (to us) bizarre names like Waikoloa, Akala, Holualoa, Punaluu. Realized I had misspelled Kilauea once I said it out loud! We are staying at Hapuna beach on Hawaii (not so bad) and Kaanapali on Maui. Monokalani and Kaihalulu are weird. It does not help that instead of trying to pronounce the names while we planned Bob just made up words with lots of vowels and syllables!!
So as long as we remember to get groceries on Maui at the airport city in Kahukui on Kaahumanu avenue, (oh my!) we ought to be fine?
Because every single thing is imported to Hawaii all the prices are high. We will likely return broke. Our daughter says to go ahead and spend!
Please pray for safe travels! Opening photo is by Michael Swiet.
Do you know what the opening photo is? Some even harvest these and sell them!
Bob and I love to hunt wildflowers. If you have ever searched for a particular shell at a beach you can relate. We search for Lady’s Slippers, Jack-in-the-Pulpit, Larkspur, etc. We have only found Lady’s Slippers in the Smoky Mountains National Park, but the others we can find locally especially at Cincinnati Nature Center (CNC).
photo by Molly
This fellow was so lovely with the sun shining through it! Sadly the ground around it is covered with Lesser Celandine which has earned the status of invasive. The Nature Center is researching ways to eradicate it. If you look at the top edge of the log above you can see the moss blooming! Beyond those tiny filaments are daffodil leaves starting to grow blossoms for 2024.
Another Jack by Molly
One friend told us when they showed a Jack-in-the-Pulpit to a young person they had to explain what a pulpit was! A pulpit is traditionally where a preacher stands to deliver the sermon. The older pulpits sometimes had a cover over them like a roof, thus the flower resemblance. In case you are still unaware, below is a sampling of pulpits! Our church does not have a pulpit or even a lectern. The Pastor just sits on a stool and talks from there.
pulpit samples on line
When we hiked Whipple Sate Nature Preserve we saw Larkspur in many colors. We also saw them yesterday at Sycamore Park in Batavia.
We agreed that walking Sycamore was so much easier than Whipple! The dog loves the trail and was not allowed at Whipple. We like this park because it is level and even paved! We walked along the East Fork of the Little Miami river, too. The sound of the running water, spring song birds … just made me breathe deeply and thank the Lord for His blessings and refreshment!
The wild dogwoods through the other forest trees were a blessing at CNC!
Are you making time to slow down, listen to the natural world around you or nearby? Do you only lament your feeling of being dried up or make an effort to renew your connection with the Source of Life? I hope you will make an effort to do just that this week!
The Virginia Bluebells at Sycamore park were well past their prime. Bob bought me a Bluebell at the Nature Center plant sale. It looks pitiful in the back garden right now. Praying it will rebound and bless us next year with flowers! Just saw that something is eating holes in the leaves. Uh oh!
Take a walk this week and look for treasures in plain sight!
My dear man walking the trail at CNC
The opening photo was take of worm casings. Evidently very rich for your garden!
Joy is the transformation of our suffering, not the escape of all we have to face.
Mark Nepo
This post has had difficult showing up. I changed the type of WordPress account and some things did not transfer so easily. So If you have read this already, forgive me! Or enjoy the flowers once more.
May Apple struggles with dead leaf
This quote and this May Apple spoke to me. I also saw a trillium struggling with a dead leaf. Will I embrace these images and know that my suffering too can be transformed? Will I grasp that I do not have to escape all I have to face?
We took a walk at Eastfork state park. Then within a day or two we walked Whipple Nature Preserve. We had been there 2 years ago, during the pandemic. Wow! We were in older bodies now. Because of partial muscle tear in my rightshoulder I could only use my walking stick with my left hand/arm. The hike was more difficult than we remembered, but when we got to the Betony Poppies it was well worth it!
Betony Poppies (yellow) and Large-Flowered Trillium (white)
The poppies covered many places on the hillside. At one point my phone got too hot next to my hiking body. This Brigadoon-like photo resulted.
Yes, it was a magical place!
How many other hillsides are covered with flowers and wonders that we never see? We are blessed to find these. I bask in their beauty. I had been feeling drained and empty. This helped fill my well again!
We saw “Nodding Trillium” which another hiker told us is supposed to bloom white. Yet here, it is blooming red!
Yes, the bloom is under the leaf! photo by r m dutina
Back to the quote above, we both were aching by the time we returned to the car. We promised we would skip one half of the trail next time… walk the branch to the left at the fork and then come back that way after we see flowers.
And oh, there were flowers! The trout lily had already bloomed. They have a special place in our hearts as at our last house they absolutely covered the hillside. The other flowers made up for missing the trout lilies! Violets in yellow, white, confederate, and purple wood violets or blue if you prefer!
photo by r m dutina
squaw root by r m dutina
As said on TV, “But wait! There’s more!!”
Shooting stars and squirrel corn!
I cannot seem to find just one name for this trillium. I have always called it Wake-Robin but online seems to call it ToadShade.
Photo by r m dutina
I left some flower photos out. We were drenched in beauty by the time we hiked back to the car. The reason I wanted to return to this hike was the Virginia Bluebells. One hiker told us they were about finished. I had almost given up hope of reaching them and Poof! There they were!
photo by r m dutina. Good thing he captured this. I was so delighted to see them, but also so tired that I never took a picture!
I am writing this on Tuesday after the Sunday hike. Yep, I am still sore and aching. Will I do it again next year? I will, with God’s help!!
The earth is the Lord’s, and the fullness thereof; the world, and they that dwell therein.
Psalm 24:1 KJV
photo by r m dutina
It seems as if this tree next to where we parked is saying,”Good job, guys! High five!”
Treasures in Plain Sight, A Christian Blog 