Category: Challenge

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Things Learned in Darkness

“Each part of each life is a lesson.” Some of us never realize this; however, some of us learn and cherish the lessons and move on.

To me “things learned in darkness” are unknown by most other people yet known to God. Others have no clue what you have endured or struggled with. Frankly, there are few on earth who would still love and accept you if they knew your struggles. Each of us is quick to judge others. God knows all about us. Palm 139:1-7 NIV says:

You have searched me, Lord,
    and you know me.
2 You know when I sit and when I rise;
    you perceive my thoughts from afar.
3 You discern my going out and my lying down;
    you are familiar with all my ways.
4 Before a word is on my tongue
    you, Lord, know it completely.
5 You hem me in behind and before,
    and you lay your hand upon me.
6 Such knowledge is too wonderful for me,
    too lofty for me to attain.

7 Where can I go from your Spirit?
    Where can I flee from your presence?

God knows. This is what omniscient means: “One having complete or unlimited knowledge, awareness, or understanding.” He also knows our struggles in the dark.

even the darkness is not dark to You;

    the night is as bright as the day,

    for darkness is as light to you.

Psalm 139:12 NRSV

My struggles are often against things from the past. Sins done both by me and to me. Things said about me that were never corrected by the speaker. Things I have wrestled with God about. Things I have wrestled with against the rulers, authorities, cosmic powers of this present darkness and spiritual forces of evil. (Ephesians 6:12 NRSV) There are also struggles in the present. Keeping my tongue in check. Being kind when it is habitual to lash against others. Staying the course, choosing to walk in the Light of Christ even when chronic illness crushes me.

Each of us faces struggles on the earth with other earthlings and with those wicked forces of evil. With Jesus and the indwelling Holy Spirit we can overcome those forces. We must be willing to endure the warfare. We must be willing to put on our armor and go into the fight. If not, the battles can continue to wage in and about us all of our lives. The same old, same old, over and over and over again.

People see you on the outside. For the most part, they do not know what struggles you have faced in your soul and spirit. But the Father sees. He is willing to come alongside you with the Spirit and the Son for each skirmish.

When I taught a Bible study on the women’s unit at the Hamilton County Justice Center I wore a button telling the women I was “not as innocent as I looked.” And I am not as innocent as I look today. God, Who reads the heart, knows what each of us have endured, as well as what each of us has done. The Word says, “But the Lord said to Samuel, “Do not look on his appearance or on the height of his stature, because I have rejected him; for the Lord does not see as mortals see; they look on the outward appearance, but the Lord looks on the heart.” 1 Samuel 16:7 NRSV

We are all broken. We each have need of the Holy Healer and Savior. 

Rescue
Lauren Daigle
You are not hidden
There's never been a moment
You were forgotten
You are not hopeless
Though you have been broken
Your innocence stolen

I hear you whisper underneath your breath
I hear your SOS, your SOS

I will send out an army to find you
In the middle of the darkest night
It's true, I will rescue you

There is no distance
That cannot be covered
Over and over
You're not defenseless
I'll be your shelter
I'll be your armor

I hear you whisper underneath your breath
I hear your SOS, your SOS

I will send out an army to find you
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One of My Poems

Eleven Fifty-three Post Meridiem © 1985 Molly Lin Dutina

Night time and the Unresolved
Come marching to my bedroom
Tramping through my head
Hurling accusations
Quoting words once said
Reason takes a low profile
While logic flees the scene
Where is the solution 
For circumstances now turned mean

Never, shoulds, and woulds
Paint dismal, hopeless scenes
Understanding vanishes
Deep each insult bleeds.

Forgiveness is the answer
That makes the war to cease.
Let it go.    Let go.    Release.
Present moment calls to me
Be NowHere in God's sweet peace

A song can be resung
The past can't be undone
But pouring in forgiveness
The fall-out is made numb

Come to here and now
Feast on today's plenty
In gratitude for all
Dare to now drink deeply 
From streams of joy and love 

We are granted 
Only to 
"Live our lives by moments"
Aren't we now

I doubt if there are many readers who have not had a similar experience. Perhaps before Lent ends this year you can walk through some of those situations asking Jesus to hold your hand and give you insight and understanding towards how to dismantle these painful memories. He is willing to walk with you. Are you willing to expose these unresolved situations to His light and power?

We are in “Holy Week,” the time we Christians focus upon what Jesus endured for our sake and the victory He gained for us. As Matilda Kipfer would ask you, “Did He die in vain? …” regarding your deliverance from the tormenter? Our best life is lived moment by moment in His resurrection power. Twelve steppers know this. Forgiveness. Letting go of wounds and hurts. Releasing those who are “living rent-free in your head.” This letting go idea was known long before the “Frozen” song was popular! That did not come along until much later. The idea has been around for eons.

If you want to drink deeply from the streams of joy and love you may with God’s help. It is best done without the burdens of the Unresolved hanging about your neck.

On the last day of the feast, the great day, Jesus stood up and proclaimed, “If any one thirst, let him come to me and drink. 38 He who believes in me, as the scripture has said, ‘Out of his heart shall flow rivers of living water.’” 39 Now this he said about the Spirit, which those who believed in him were to receive; for as yet the Spirit had not been given, because Jesus was not yet glorified.

John 7:37-39 RSV

Granted it would be difficult to illustrate or photograph you getting a drink from the river of Living Water flowing out of your own heart, but you can imagine the refreshment that this young man is gaining from this water. There are times when we thirst for God and this poem illustrates one way to let go of the warfare and enjoy the provision Christ has made for us.

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Bend the Knee of My Heart

I mentioned recently in this blog how important it was to me that the Episcopalians actually humbled themselves and would kneel every service. Here is one of the Canticles from the Morning Prayer service that has increased in meaning for me as my knees are less and less cooperative for the act of kneeling. It is a prayer of repentance and useful at all times, but especially during Lent.

less cooperative knees

If you are unaware of your sin, perhaps this prayer can help you remember a few. “I have sinned and I know my wickedness only too well.” Rest there for a time. The Holy Spirit will gently remind you if you are sincerely asking.

Canticle 14 – A Song of Penitence Prayer of Manasseh

O Lord and Ruler of the hosts of heaven, *
    God of Abraham, Isaac, and Jacob,
    and of all their righteous offspring:
You made the heavens and the earth, *
    with all their vast array.
All things quake with fear at your presence; *
    they tremble because of your power.
But your merciful promise is beyond all measure; *
    it surpasses all that our minds can fathom.
O Lord, you are full of compassion, *
    long-suffering, and abounding in mercy.
You hold back your hand; *
    you do not punish as we deserve.
In your great goodness, Lord,
you have promised forgiveness to sinners, *
    that they may repent of their sin and be saved.
And now, O Lord, I bend the knee of my heart, *
    and make my appeal, sure of your gracious goodness.
I have sinned, O Lord, I have sinned, *
    and I know my wickedness only too well.
Therefore I make this prayer to you: *
    Forgive me, Lord, forgive me.
Do not let me perish in my sin, *
    nor condemn me to the depths of the earth.
For you, O Lord, are the God of those who repent, *
    and in me you will show forth your goodness.
Unworthy as I am, you will save me,
in accordance with your great mercy, *
    and I will praise you without ceasing all the days of my life.
For all the powers of heaven sing your praises, *
    and yours is the glory to ages of ages. Amen.

There is debate about whether Manasseh should be considered part of the Bible. If you are interested in the debate you can see https://www.gotquestions.org/Prayer-of-Manasseh.html I am not concerned about that. I am concerned about keeping my heart clean before God and trusting in His goodness. Bending the knee of my heart in confession is one way I try to do just that.

KNEELING—falling to one’s knees as a sign of reverence, obedience, or respect

International Children’s Bible Dictionary (Nashville, TN.: Tommy Nelson, 2006).

We are usually quite aware of the times we disappoint the Lord. Perhaps you have not called your actions wickedness, but compared to the glory and righteousness of God those actions are nothing less. Yes, we are to kneel as a sign of reverence, obedience, respect. I do not think God cares if I actually bend my knees to the ground or bend the knee of my heart because my heart can at times be more stubborn than my old knees. He is looking for my yieldedness to His authority. He is a God full of compassion and quick to forgive, but we must confess our sins. I love the verse in 1 John 1:9 that says He is faithful and just to forgive us our sins.

If we confess our sins, he who is faithful and just will forgive us our sins and cleanse us from all unrighteousness.

1 John 1:9 RSV

Notice that the above verse begins with the little two letter word “if.” His forgiveness and cleansing are dependent upon our willingness to confess. The first step is ours.

I am praying you will examine your life and take those sins to the One who grants peace and mercy. I assure you, it is worth your time and effort.

Posted on in Aging, Challenge, Faith, Humor, medical treatment, Prayer, Spiritual discipline, Spiritual growth, Yield

Stand Look Ask

Thus says the Lord:

Stand at the crossroads, and look,

    and ask for the ancient paths,

where the good way lies; and walk in it,

    and find rest for your souls.

But they said, “We will not walk in it.”

Jeremiah 6:16 NRSV

I have been familiar with this passage for many years. When I had the recent pain flare it was brought back to my mind. As I seek ways to cope I keep remembering this passage. Stand. Look. Ask. Walk. Find rest.

Seems simple enough. I do not want to be part of the folks who said, “We will not walk in it.” Just like my life verse Isaiah 30:15

For thus said the Lord God, the Holy One of Israel:

In returning and rest you shall be saved;

    in quietness and in trust shall be your strength.

But you refused

Isaiah 30:15

I do not want to refuse in things the Lord asks of me. So yes, I will seek medical advice, but I will also look to the Lord for guidance and instruction on how to cope with this part of aging. When Bob worked in the hospital as a Medical Technologist part of his job was to go on the floor and draw blood specimens early each morning. He often had to wake the patients to do that. He asked a man one morning how he was doing. The gentleman replied, “Well, I woke up on the right side of the grass!” We have taken that as one of our bywords when aging and illness throws us for a loop. The alternative would be to not finish out the stories going on in our lives and the lives of those we love. So even when we are miserable, we are grateful to keep on living.

Next time you are stymied in your life perhaps Jeremiah could guide you, too. Can’t hurt to try that as your prayer guide when frustrated. Ask God. He will show you the ancient way, where the good path lies. Please, do not join the ranks of those who said “We will not walk in it” or outright refuse His help.

Posted on in Challenge, Collection of Quotes, Faith, Family, Just do it, Memories, Music, Spiritual discipline, Spiritual growth, Yield

Nothing Impossible

I saw an advertisement recently that used a quote from Audrey Hepburn. I had never heard this one! She said,

I just love that! The word itself says I’m possible. That is just the optimism I believe the Lord had when He created you and me! He makes us possible and He provides what we need to fulfill His plan on the earth.

His divine power has given us everything needed for life and godliness, through the knowledge of him who called us by his own glory and goodness. Thus he has given us, through these things, his precious and very great promises, so that through them you may escape from the corruption that is in the world because of lust, and may become participants of the divine nature.

2 Peter 1:3-4

He has given us His Son. The power of resurrection life through the sacrifice of Jesus and the indwelling Spirit. Everything we need for life and godliness is ours. Are we taking advantage of the things we have been given? Are we telling ourselves “I’m possible.”

There was a time when it would have been thought impossible that people of color could star in Cinderella, and I would ask “Why not?” There was a time when my mother took my sister for modeling lessons while I stayed home to strip the wax off the kitchen floor on my hands and knees. I called myself “CinderLinda.” (Molly is a nickname.) Yet the following shows how very possible “impossible” things are!

You may have asked God if there is some way He can use you in His Kingdom. I would cheer a resounding, “Yes!!” Our Pastor often quotes Henry Blackaby.

“We don’t choose what we will do for God; He invites us to join Him where He wants to involve us.”

― Henry T. Blackaby, Experiencing God

So have you asked the Father where He wants to involve you? If He shows you where He is working will you be willing to join Him? Even if it is not a place you choose to serve? Are you willing to declare through His power “I’m possible!”

Many years ago the following praise chorus was popular. Praise choruses are a great way to learn Scripture. This one quotes Jeremiah proclaiming praise in The Amplified Bible Jeremiah 17:32. ‘Ah Lord God! Behold, You have made the heavens and the earth by Your great power and by Your outstretched arm! There is nothing too difficult or too wonderful for You—. The outstretched arm is the weakest position. You will get the idea after the first minute!

God can use anyone yielded to Him for the growth and building of His kingdom. The best question is “Are you willing to serve Him?”

Posted on in Aging, Book quotes, Challenge, Faith, Memories, Prayer, Yield

His Grip

It’s not my grip on him that matters but his grip on me. And his grip is sure. So is his presence in my life. God is always near us. Always for us. Always in us. We may forget him, but God will never forget us. We’re forever on his mind and in his plans. He called himself “‘Immanuel’ (which means ‘God with us’).” Matthew 1:23 NRSV

Oswald Chambers

My hands are getting weaker the older I become. God is not worried. He has me in His grasp.

Even when I was a very young Christian and did not understand much of His Word, He had His grip on me. Now that I am aging, I am still within His grip.

I love that quote that my grip on Him does not matter – but His grip on me.

He is able to keep all that the Father has given Him.

Everyone the Father gives me will come to me, and the one who comes to me I will never cast out.  For I have come down from heaven, not to do my own will, but the will of him who sent me.  This is the will of him who sent me: that I should lose none of those he has given me but should raise them up on the last day.  For this is the will of my Father: that everyone who sees the Son and believes in him will have eternal life, and I will raise him up on the last day.

John 6:35-40 CSB

But I am not ashamed, for I know the One in whom I have put my trust, and I am sure that He is able to guard until that day what I have entrusted to Him

2 Timothy 1:12-12 NRSV

I can commit my life and my all to Him. He is able to keep me until the Day of His glorious coming again.

Posted on in Aging, Challenge, Faith, Memories, Spiritual discipline, Spiritual growth, Thanks, Yield

Rest on Your Laurels

… means to be satisfied with one’s achievement, by implication enough so as not to expend further effort. Wikipedia: wise one of the earth says, “The term, dating from the mid-nineteenth century, alludes to the wreaths of laurel leaves use to crown the winner of athletic contests in ancient Greek and Roman times; the laurel today remains a symbol of victory.”

Mountain Laurels GSM

Still boasting about something God used you for?

Thus says the Lord: Do not let the wise boast in their wisdom, do not let the mighty boast in their might, do not let the wealthy boast in their wealth;  but let those who boast boast in this, that they understand and know me, that I am the Lord; I act with steadfast love, justice, and righteousness in the earth, for in these things I delight, says the Lord.

Jeremiah 9:23-24 NRSV

Some have made mission trips and saw the Lord move mightily and use them in significant ways. May all glory go to God. Some have never traveled far at all, yet the Lord often uses them frequently in the local store.

Consider your own call, brothers and sisters: not many of you were wise by human standards, not many were powerful, not many were of noble birth. But God chose what is foolish in the world to shame the wise; God chose what is weak in the world to shame the strong; God chose what is low and despised in the world, things that are not, to reduce to nothing things that are, so that no one might boast in the presence of God. He is the source of your life in Christ Jesus, who became for us wisdom from God, and righteousness and sanctification and redemption, in order that, as it is written, “Let the one who boasts, boast in the Lord.”

1 Corinthians 1:26-31 NRSV

Matilda Kipfer said she was a simple woman, not wise. Being foolish by the standards of the world was fine by her because the Lord chose what is foolish to confound the wise.

Seems to me there was an image like this in my childhood Bible

If I must boast, I will boast of the things that show my weakness. The God and Father of the Lord Jesus (blessed be he forever!) knows that I do not lie.  In Damascus, the governor under King Aretas guarded the city of Damascus in order to seize me,  but I was let down in a basket through a window in the wall, and escaped from his hands. It is necessary to boast; nothing is to be gained by it, but I will go on to visions and revelations of the Lord.

2 Corinthians 11:30 – 2 Corinthians 12:1

Most humans do not want to be seen as weak. Yet Paul tells us how he was lowered in a basket to escape a king who wanted to seize Paul. The Bible says it is better to be weak and a fool than to follow after things of the world. Let God be seen as strong and mighty, even at your own expense.

Did God do something mighty through your service? If so, we must remember we were God’s tool just as Balaam’s donkey was God’s tool. Numbers 22 tells the story of how Balaam was known as a professional prophet who traveled about and cursed military enemies for money. He was a seer for hire. His only power was words to put curses on others. (Isn’t the Bible full of interesting characters?) His donkey saved his life three times when the donkey saw the angel of the Lord blocking the path with a drawn sword. How do we know this? The third time it happened as Balaam beat his donkey with anger and the Lord opened the donkey’s mouth to speak!

Numbers 22:21-35 Donkey saves Balaam’s Life

Being corrected and saved by a donkey has to bring humility I would think. In the end of the story God had victory over the evil troops. No curses were allowed.

So what now? Give thanks for the ways God has used you in the past. What have you done recently with God? Have you found where He is working and joined His project? Or are you still telling others what He did long ago and far away? Has your laurel wreath withered and become only an old story? Do you know Jesus and have you talked with Him today? What are your marching orders from Him? Are you walking in obedience to His orders?

I hope you are not sitting on your laurels and letting the Kingdom work fall to others. “Let those who boast boast that they understand and know Me.” “Let the one who boasts boast in the Lord.” The Lord wants it known that He acts with steadfast love, justice and righteousness on the earth. Have you shared that message? As we gain a deeper understanding of Him let’s spread that knowledge every place we go. Perhaps He will use us to His glory! Meanwhile, let your laurels bloom and move on.

Posted on in Amazing Creations, Book quotes, Challenge, Faith, Family, Humor, Journal, Just do it, Memories, Nature, Prayer, Spiritual discipline, Spiritual growth, Yield

Pearls

 “Again, the kingdom of heaven is like a merchant seeking beautiful pearls, who, when he had found one pearl of great price, went and sold all that he had and bought it.”

Matthew 13:45-46
Purported to be the largest pearl ever found

So what do you value the most? The parable says this is what the kingdom of heaven is like …. Do you value the Kingdom and your relationship with the Trinity above everything else? Would you give everything you have to get this pearl?

“But seek first the kingdom of God and his righteousness, and all these things will be provided for you.”

Matthew 6:33

Jesus said the above after telling the people not to worry about clothing or food or anything else. If we are willing to seek Him, the Kingdom of God and His righteousness, we will have everything else we need.

St. Isaac of Syria, from the 600s, continues to influence Orthodox spirituality today. He is known as one of the greatest spiritual writers of the Christian East. His writing was suggested to me in 2009. Remarking on this parable he wrote:

A swimmer dives into the sea naked, in order to find a pearl.

A wise monk journeys through life, stripped of all that he has, to find within himself the pearl, Jesus Christ, and finding him, he no longer seeks to acquire anything else beside him.

Daily Readings with St. Isaac of Syria

I believe the first thing we stumble over in this pursuit is naked, or stripped of all that he has. We are simply way too attached to our things. If you were from Ukraine right now you would either be putting your life on the line for your country or running for your life with few, if any, possessions. Are we willing to turn loose of our hold on possessions so we might grasp the Lord firmly as our source of life and reason for living?

Have you forgotten –

Naked I came from my mother’s womb,

and naked I will leave this life.

Job 1:20a

The saying goes “You can’t take it with you” but what if you turned loose of the all-encompassing life-draining drive for power and possessions now? It is unlikely you will move to a barren wasteland and become a desert father or mother. You could however focus your life upon the Kingdom of God and His righteousness. You could pursue this pearl of great price and find treasure you never suspected was available to you in 2022. Never will the question be answered in your own heart unless you experiment with opening your hand, letting go of the tenacious grasp of things, so you can grab hold of the Lord.

Do you have a Halloween store near you? Once when I was having difficulty turning loose of my teenage children the Lord had me buy a rubber hand like the ones below.

I took it home and easily cut off the red line of ‘blood.” I placed it palm up on my dashboard. The Lord had said I could turn my kids loose to Him or He could pry them out of my hands. Every time the car hit a bump those fingers would vibrate and wiggle. Yes, it was a clear object lesson for me and it made me laugh to boot. God has such a sense of humor!

Perhaps you need to visit the local part supply store and get a hand for yourself? Turn loose of a few obsessions first, trusting that He is able to be in charge of those. Then a few more things. Then a few more, filling your time and mind with His word and presence. He is able to inspire and help you with this if only you will ask.

Yield to Him and find out what He has in mind.

Posted on in Book quotes, Challenge, Collection of Quotes, Faith, Journal, Just do it, Memories, Music, Prayer, Spiritual discipline, Spiritual growth

Total Surrender

It was perhaps 1981 when I read Freedom From a Self-centered Life/Dying to Self Selections from the writings of William Law, edited by Andrew Murray. Page 91 reads:

When God created man, to find his blessedness in entire dependence upon Him, and in receiving all life and goodness each moment from Him, humility was the one condition of his continuing in that blessed state. When man disobeyed and fell it was self-exaltation that drew him from God and became the ruling power of his life and the cause of all sin and wretchedness. When Christ became man it was to restore in humanity that blessed dependence upon God: by His humble, meek, patient resignation to God to atone for our sin and create anew in us the nature of man before the fall.

From morning to night – you want to begin every day very definitely with an Act of humility, recognizing it as the first duty of the day and of your life to get into the right place of dependence before God, in meek, patient, humble resignation to Him.

Freedom from a Self-centered Life

Entire dependence upon God. What a concept and it can be ours in 2022! Meek, patience, humble resignation to Him. Why? Because Isaiah 55:8 is true. His thoughts are higher than our thoughts and His ways higher than our ways. Because Jeremiah 17:9-10 is also true.

The heart is devious above all else;
    it is perverse—
    who can understand it?
I the Lord test the mind
    and search the heart,
to give to all according to their ways,
    according to the fruit of their doings.

Praying about this all those years ago a melody and a verse came to me. it goes like this.

Total Surrender ©2018 Molly Lin Dutina 
Total surrender brings total power; 
Spirit of Christ in me, 
Totally yielded to Thee every hour, 
Until Thy will I see. 

Death to my passions and every desire, 
Living wholly for Thee. 
Have Thine own way, 
Spirit of love, 
Totally flow through me.

Entire dependence upon Him. Dan Cooksey taught a course called The Shepherd’s Staff. In the midst of that course he emphasized the same idea. I adapted it to what I am to say to Jesus if I am to remain part of the Bride of Christ. The traditional marriage ceremony words are “I do.” Dan taught us I stands for Intimacy, D stand for Dependence, and O stands for Obedience.

As part of the Bride of Christ I live my life practicing Intimacy with Christ, Dependence upon Him and Obedience to what He asks me to do. Total Surrender. I DO.

Oh Lord, draw us closer and closer to Your heart. Help us to bring You joy and delight as we live our lives in and through You.

Posted on in Book quotes, Challenge, Faith, Just do it, Memories, Prayer, Spiritual discipline, Spiritual growth, Yield

Lenten Surrender

Surrender: 1.To relinquish possession or control of (something) to another because of demand or compulsion. 2. To give up in favor of another, especially voluntarily

Has Lent been leading you to a place of surrender? Have you discovered that God’s ways are better than your ways, God’s thoughts higher than your thoughts? Do you have a hope of eternity with Him? An eye towards the future in the grandest sense?

The Book of Common Prayer in the service for Ash Wednesday (March 2, of this year) reminds us why Lent is celebrated.

Dear People of God: The first Christians observed with great devotion the days of our Lord’s passion and resurrection, and it became the custom of the Church to prepare for them by a season of penitence and fasting. This season of Lent provided a time in which converts to the faith were prepared for Holy Baptism. It was also a time when those who, because of notorious sins, had been separated from the body of the faithful were reconciled by penitence and forgiveness, and restored to the fellowship of the Church. Thereby, the whole congregation was put in mind of the message of pardon and absolution set forth in the Gospel of our Savior, and of the need which all Christians continually have to renew their repentance and faith.

“I invite you, therefore, in the name of the Church, to the observance of a holy Lent, by self-examination and repentance; by prayer, fasting, and self-denial; and by reading and meditating on God’s holy Word. And, to make a right beginning of repentance, and as a mark of our mortal nature, let us now kneel before the Lord, our maker and redeemer.“

How does this apply now? We are in the midst of the Lenten season. Easter is celebrated this year on April 17. Perhaps you do not attend a liturgical church or any church whatsoever? You can still observe Lent with the Lord our Savior. Keep a holy Lent by self-examination and repentance. I was terrible at this years ago. I knew all about self-castigation and beating myself up for things, so I feared this idea of self-examination. What if I got into it and could not find my way out again to joyful fellowship with Christ? Self-examination as I now understand it has to do with looking at the hopes Jesus has for me and how I actually live. Confess my wrongs, receive forgiveness and move on, returning to fellowship with Him. Brother Lawrence said to return to fellowship quickly!

Prayer, fasting and self-denial. Pray without ceasing (1Thessalonians 5:17) is something I aim for daily. Gets harder after 4 PM when I feel worse physically, but I keep pursuing the goal. Fasting this year, I am fasting from too many words. Fasting from thinking, like Catherine Marshall did, that my opinion on everything counts. Self-denial goes right with that too many words. I am trying to give up thinking I must have the last word on any topic. Reading and meditating on God’s Word. There is no excuse for me here. I have tapped into Bible gateway to help with that. Many of the versions they provide can be read to you. So whether I am cooking or walking the dog, I can listen to those 5 chapters of Psalms a day or one chapter of Proverbs. No excuses as long as my phone is charged! One way of meditating on the Word.

I ran into a person last week who balked in fear at the idea of Christians meditating. We are to center our thoughts, prayers and being upon the Word. How can that be wrong? Center yourself with “Maranatha”, Our Lord, come! (1 COR 16:22) or using your breath “Inhale: He must increase, Exhale, I must decrease.” (John 3:30). Meditate upon the Word. Listen for His instruction.

One thing that drew me to the Episcopalians in 1965 was the idea cited in this Lenten invitation: “And, to make a right beginning of repentance, and as a mark of our mortal nature, let us now kneel before the Lord, our maker and redeemer.” The many churches I had visited read Psalms and spoke about kneeling before the Lord our God, but I never saw them bend a knee. The Episcopalians did. Regularly. Every service in prayer.

Back to surrender.

“For my thoughts are not your thoughts,
    neither are your ways my ways, declares the Lord.
For as the heavens are higher than the earth,
    so are my ways higher than your ways
    and my thoughts than your thoughts.”

Isaiah 55:8-9 ESV
Open Hands — Image by © Royalty-Free/Corbis

We come to a place of genuine surrender when we realize the Lord has thoughts and ways that are continually higher than ours, better than ours, more life giving than ours. Have you heard the concept about parenting that when a child misbehaves after they have time to reflect on their misdeed you should ask the child what the punishment should be? Usually they choose something more harsh than we had in mind. So, too, is our life with God. His first choice is almost always to bring us to a place of life and that more abundantly. Not more things, but a richer, more authentic, Christ-like life.

Have your Lenten practices shown you areas where you fall short? Mine have. My prayer is that these revelations about myself will carry over into my Easter celebration and into the remainder of my life.