Category: Aging

Posted on in Aging, Just do it, Moving

Chronic Pain Coping

Around 2013 I copied this from a library book. I have tried to find the title and author online and cannot, thus I have no author to credit.

These are not based on 12 Steps, but steps for coping.

  1. Accept the fact of having chronic pain. (That is enough to make one gag.)
  2. Set specific goals for work, hobbies and social activities toward which you will work.
  3. Let yourself get angry at your pain if it seems to be getting the best of you.
  4. Take your analgesics on a strict time schedule, and then taper off as directed until you are no longer taking any.
  5. Get in the best physical shape possible, and keep fit.
  6. Learn how to relax, and practice relaxation techniques regularly.
  7. Keep yourself busy.
  8. Pace your activities.
  9. Have your family and friends support only your healthy behavior, not your invalidism.
  10. Be open and reasonable with your doctor.
  11. Practice effective empathy with others having pain problems.
  12. Remain hopeful.

My first response after typing these steps is “I will with God’s help.” Over the years (since diagnosis in 1990s) I have tried to learn and practice these things. Would love to brag I have mastered them all. I have NOT!

Yep, something like this during a fibrmyalgia flare!

Like Paul I continue to try to learn to yield myself to God and stay responsible to bring my flesh under control. God will not magically take care of this for me. He requires my cooperation.

But I discipline my body and bring it into subjection, lest, when I have preached to others, I myself should become disqualified.

1 Corinthians 9:27 NKJV

Along with my body, I must discipline my mind, my will and my emotions to bring honor to God as long as I live!

In the Episcopalian Book of Common Prayers you can find the Baptismal Covenant. After each declaration the congregation says, “I will with God’s help.” I believe that coping with chronic pain requires my focus upon the goals of this covenant too if I am to be truly successful.

Celebrant	Will you continue in the apostles' teaching and
fellowship, in the breaking of the bread, and in the
prayers?
People	I will, with God's help.
 	
Celebrant	Will you persevere in resisting evil, and, whenever
you fall into sin, repent and return to the Lord?
People	I will, with God's help.

Celebrant	Will you proclaim by word and example the Good
News of God in Christ?
People	I will, with God's help.
 	
Celebrant	Will you seek and serve Christ in all persons, loving
your neighbor as yourself?
People	I will, with God's help.
 	
Celebrant	Will you strive for justice and peace among all
people, and respect the dignity of every human
being?
People	I will, with God's help.

May the Lord bless you as you face your own struggles. We are all broken and need His help!

Consistent self-care is not selfish. Consistent self-care for me is a holy obligation. "These skills protect us by building inner resilience that shields us from most problems and enables us to bounce back from the rest."  Just do your best and lean hard upon the Lord.

So we moved and by the second day, May 13, I had trashed my back. Really did it the worse than ever before.  That slowed down unpacking for certain! I had lots and lots of help, but I did not pace myself well, I did not remember not to bend over. I did lots of things wrong. Degenerative disc disease is one of the reasons we moved. On June 15 I had another epidural. Trying to behave now. Time will tell if that is all the treatment I need. Please pray for me!

Hope those coping steps help any of you who also suffer from chronic pain. Twelve step programs often repeat, "It works if you work it!"
Posted on in Aging, Beagle, Faith, Moving, Prayer, Special Event, Thanks

Signing Off for a Time

Considering the computers, tv, wifi system, etc. all have to be disconnected, packed, unpacked and reconnected you might not hear from me for a while. But wait! through the magic of the Word Press Cloud I could write and store and schedule until my strength runs out! That is how the posts usually come to you. I typically write on Monday and Tuesday morning. This week Tuesday will be running to various places like T-Mobile. Energy is not in abundance right now. So in case you don’t see posts for a while, remember to lift us in prayer regarding the move.

During 15 years a couple can accumulate a bunch of stuff. We have given away, thrown away and donated items for months now. We also know that once we begin to unpack we are likely to unload even more items. When you pack things up and get them out of sight for several months it is amazing what you can live without!

I have also been missing my wall calendar (I know, so old fashioned). The magnifying mirror from the bathroom wall has been absent since Bob patched and repaired practically every single nail in every single room.

He is such a hard worker. I have no idea how I would ever accomplish most things without him. We often debate who will die first. If he goes first I get a Corgi. They make me smile. Been told they kill sweepers with their constant shedding. Anything to make me smile during the grief of losing my husband would be invaluable. Fifty years of marriage and counting. We are amazed!

They say corgi puppies look like potatoes on legs.

Speaking of dogs, I let Lucky off the leash inside the new house for the first time last Sunday! She pranced around as if to say “Oh, I get it now!” She has been going in the house since it was just studs, no walls. Soon she will have an enormous closet in the master bedroom to sleep in when it storms! I will set up a water bowl for her Saturday before we get her from the kennel.

There she is, coming out of hallway to laundry and Master Suite!

We area moving eight miles, one zip code away, undoing 15 years of settling in this place. We are calling Platform Street our last home unless we get moved to a nursing home some day (hoping not!).

Even to your old age and gray hairs

    I am He, I am He who will sustain you.

I have made you and I will carry you;

    I will sustain you and I will rescue you.

Isaiah 46:4

Yes, Lord, we look to You to sustain us, carry us and rescue us from ourselves. Even as we enter our old age and lose more gray hairs! We trust You with all of our lives, Most High God.

Posted on in Aging, Collection of Quotes, Faith, Memories, Nature, Spiritual growth, Thanks, Yield

“Life Sayings?”

This seemed to show up for a few folks. I am sending it again for those who did not receive it. Hope it strengthens your faith.

When I used to mingle with some folks they would speak of their life verses from the Bible. I have those, but what I want to examine here are sayings or sentences that have influenced my faith life over the years.

How often I am walking outdoors and a feather comes on the breeze. At times it is from a bird on the roof or in a tree. Most times I cannot locate the source of the feather. Can you imagine yourself as that feather?

“‘Held by God … like a feather which has no weight from its own strength and lets itself be carried by the wind” – so wrote the medieval mystic, Hildegard of Bingen. Her image of a feather lightly floating on the wind is more than spiritual poetry; it gives us a way to live. Being like a feather on the wind is particularly necessary in these difficult days that teeter-totter two millennia.”

-Unknown

This one came from my struggles to obey the Lord my God regardless of circumstances.

Constant peaceful yielded joyful obedience to the Almighty.

I have made alphabet-beaded bracelets in so many forms to remind me of this. In the Old Testament the believers were told to take the commandments of God and “Tie them as symbols on your hands and bind them on your foreheads. Write them on the door frames of your houses and on your gates.” Deuteronomy 6:8-9 So I have worn them, recited them, shared a few with friends, lost a few bracelets and made a few more. Recently I shipped most of my collection to my friends in Nepal.

One year tired of hearing myself complain about chronic pain I wrote the following and posted it on the bathroom mirror.

“I have determined that this day, each time I am drawn up short by pain, I will praise You for I love You better than life – even better than quality of life.”

I so needed to type these out this week, especially about being drawn up short by pain and what reaction I will choose. Chronic pain never takes a vacation, but God is ever-present and loves me. When I was first diagnosed I heard Him say, “I will be with you in this.” What could be better than to have the Lord with you?

Posted on in Aging, Faith, Marriage and Memories, Moving

Saying Goodbye

When we moved here 15 years ago we named the house “Treetops.” The driveway and front entrance are on the street level. The yard slopes down sharply so that the walkout and basement level and actually a story down. The upper story windows are almost level with the treetops. With the sloping yard it has always seemed larger than the dimensions.

After the backyard slope there is a small drainage ditch. Then our yard slopes up rather sharply and is covered with woods. We have enjoyed watching the seasons change and the wildlife that populate the woods, especially the birds.

Our new house is on a tiny level lot. The neighbors behind us have a sprinkling of trees. Kitchen, dining room and bedroom windows have the view there. Our windows on each side of the house look at the siding of the houses to our left and right. The office windows look out on the street. This will be a major change!!

So many major changes in store. I have been grieving the loss of this lovely home. And that grief is healthy. This has been a gorgeous place to live. We simply cannot do those stairs to the basement any longer.

One day this week our son gave me his Christmas gift to me. He dug up a few plants for us to take with us to the new house. They will not go in the ground until we get some sort of planting beds. At this point we are uncertain if we will even have sod before we move!

As Jeff dug, I walked around consoling myself that next year I can easily purchase pink bleeding heart and lily of the valley. See we have spent the last 15 years enjoying and improving our flower beds here. Funny, one rationale for moving 15 years ago was I could no longer take care of the flower beds because of arthritis. My husband and I spent 15 years making new flower beds here. I am shaking my head, “Go figure!” Guess as long as there is a spot to grow things I am unlikely to learn not to garden!

We will move to a little green house on Platform Street. What a place to launch last era of life! Fooling around with trying to think in haiku (to me, sparse words to contain broad thoughts) I recently wrote:

Loved living in treetops
Spring mornings I grieve
Packin' I land on the ground
Lot 49, soon to be 27 Platform Street!
Gloomy day, but the rock work is done!

We are so blessed I am at a loss for words.

Posted on in Aging, Faith, Humor, Marriage and Memories, Moving

Humor

Since we began looking at moving, buying a house with laundry on the first floor, and finally realizing we would have to build to get that – my greatest fear has been what if one of us dies before we move in? With the pandemic and both of us health compromised it was not an outrageous fear. Now that we are both immunized and within 3 weeks of moving I have begun to breath much easier.

I was on YouTube looking to identify the sparrow in the tree outside the office when I came across this joke. It is SO fitting for our age and situation, though I do not play golf.

Too many sparrows and none recorded with the song I am hearing, but laughter is BEST and I think God approves!!

Even to your old age and gray hairs

    I am He, I am He who will sustain you.

I have made you and I will carry you;

    I will sustain you and I will rescue you.

Isaiah 46:4 NIV
Posted on in Aging, Humor

Smell That?

As a woman I have used many pheromone enhancements. Shiseido Zen, Estee Lauder Cinnabar, The Body Shop toilette, White Musk, Chanel colognes and perfumes both No. 5 and Allure have all enticed my husband to my side.

Now at 70 my most overriding fragrances are camphor and menthol. How did that happen? Some enterprising perfumer should develop the fragrance that interacts best with my latest fragrances!

I repeat, growing old is NOT for sissies!

Posted on in Aging, Amazing Creations, Humor, Poetry

Haiku and Other Forms I Have Not Mastered

I often read a blog by Suzette Benjamin. Click on the link to read her work.

https://suzetteb.home.blog/2021/04/09/wets-his-whistle-a-haiku/

She amazes me with her mastery of Haiku and other forms of poetry I can barely pronounce. So I was feeling challenged.

Looking out the kitchen one day last winter I saw this and tried to put it into haiku phrasing.

Burritos © Molly Lin Dutina 2021

Burritos in the trees
Like large Chipotle made
Perched winter mourning doves.

Nah - not the right numbering, but similar idea.
Maybe I will just stick to my forms. Nope, I will keep trying to learn something new! Good for an old person to do!

Posted on in Aging, Moving, Thanks

Promotional Video with Staged Furnishings

Coming soon! To be my new address! Yes, I am getting excited as we count down the weeks instead of months to moving 🙂

Funny, the opening shot is not the entrance to our house!! We requested a brown front door. You have to imagine this with brown spice cabinets, no carpeting in great room, laundry will have washer, dryer, hot water heater and stationary tub. Owner shower will have a short tiled bench, not 5 foot. One guest room will be our shared office. The other guest room will be sewing room and Bob’s space for prayer. My space will likely be in the master bedroom. For the video they took down all the doors 🙂

We are grateful as we wait. Please lift us in prayer. Moving is listed as one of the top 50 stressors in life. Last time we moved and were trying to get settled I called Bob at work one day and said, “If the woman who lives here would tell me where the muffin pans are I would make you some cupcakes!!” Humans do not like change, even good changes like a new house and getting rid of all the stairs!

Posted on in Aging, Amazing Creations, Covid 19, Faith, Just do it, Social Distancing, Thanks

Covid-19 Vaccine TOGETHER

I am so thankful for each of the scientists who worked on producing the vaccines. Bob and I have both had 2 doses of the Pfizer brand. After the second dose we both had a couple days of feeling just crummy. Had already planned to lay low and let our bodies adjust. We are much better now.

I must admit, I have been cringing the past few months with all the ads on TV about the vaccine and showing those needles filled and up close, in arms, too.

When I was three or four I played jump rope with my sister and her friends. They were trying to get me to do double dutch.

I fell. I broke my leg. I rode in the backseat of the car many miles to the hospital. I was put in traction for 6 weeks. (Think 1954.) My father was in the same hospital with one of his many heart attacks. In 1954 there was not much they could do about heart disease. At one point they rolled our beds into the same room so I could see him. When I came home from Good Samaritan Hospital I was in love with the Sisters of Charity who took such good care of me. I am certain I learned the Presence of Jesus while there. I remember them holding my hand when the doctor was ready to cast my leg. The wraps were hot and I was so afraid.

Once home I was also terrified of white coats and needles. I was so fearful my parents could not tell me about any doctor appointment the night before because I would get very worked up. I worked for years to overcome all of that trauma. And I succeeded.

As to those ads showing the injection and those needles. I was more than unsettled knowing I would get that twice. I did okay. The first nurse to administer it did not do well. The second nurse was great.

We are still washing our hands. Avoiding crowds. Wearing our masks. Keeping our distance. But there is a sense of coming freedom!

We still need to keep well so we can get moved and unpacked! Bob says this virus will likely become like the flu. We will eventually get annual injections. We are both in high risk categories, but so grateful for the vaccine developers, nurses who administer the injection and the other people who actually get the injection to help keep it from spreading and killing people.

TOGETHER, yes, we are in this together and we can get through this TOGETHER. I praise God giving the scientific community the wisdom and methodology to develop these vaccines. I rejoice that He is able to keep us. I cannot answer the questions about those who died, and those who grieve their passing. I have been holding my breath afraid that Bob or I might die before we get this house built. So far, it looks as if we are moving there together.

Regardless, I will continue to praise my Lord and my God. He is “worthy to receive glory and honor and power for You created all things and by Your will they were created.” Revelation 4:11 NIV

This song keeps following me and I decided it fits right here. All along there was another in the fire. And He remains with us.

Shadrach, Meshach and Abednego replied to him, “King Nebuchadnezzar, we do not need to defend ourselves before you in this matter. If we are thrown into the blazing furnace, the God we serve is able to deliver us from it, and He will deliver us from Your Majesty’s hand.  But even if He does not, we want you to know, Your Majesty, that we will not serve your gods or worship the image of gold you have set up.” He said, “Look! I see four men walking around in the fire, unbound and unharmed, and the fourth looks like a son of the gods.”

–Daniel 3:16-18, 25

Posted on in Aging, Faith, Moving, Special Event

House Progress

Whirlwind here in Ohio!
Plumber was followed by furnace installation was followed by electrician. Inspection upon inspection (fine by us!!). Below is a photo update.

My kitchen window. Oops! It is set so that my eye hits the middle of the frame.

Oh well, I will adjust. Look just above the middle of the frame. The infamous hammock! It is on a rope in the neighbor’s yard that the wind wrapped around the tree.

Looking from the front foyer into the great room. Sliding glass door goes in the large opening on left of back wall. Window to the right will be over the sink. Dining room is in front of slider. Kitchen/dining room measure 23′ x 14′.

Great room measures 17′ x 16′. So hard to tell dimensions with studs showing!

Puddle on floor is from before they got roof on.

So the puddle is approximate placement of refrigerator. Left of that will be cabinet, stove, cabinet then pantry in the corner. Wall where the boxes are is wall where TV and photos will go. See the rolls of green insulation? Door to the right of those is laundry room. Use your imagination for the next one, too! Behind kitchen wall is master bedroom. Doorway is left of the insulation. About now you are saying, “Yeah! right!”

We did not want those black cabinets. We chose sort of a cherry finish instead, “Fairfield Nutmeg.” To the right of the black cabinet is our countertop sample. Carpet sample will be in bedrooms and office. Tile will be flooring in bathrooms and laundry floor. Above the tile is sample of the resilient flooring that will be from front door, throughout great room, dining room and kitchen. I think it goes down the hall to laundry and master bedroom, too.

Not the layout of our kitchen, but a sample of Fairfield Nutmeg cabinets.

Maybe we will get that lovely tile work done after we move in?

So we are still finding things to pack, even though we have hired movers to pack as well as move us. Lots of imagination for now. Oh we also have a garage door now! Front door is simply plastic sheet at this point.

Today Bob spoke with the people who lay the sod and install the plants. We want to choose our own plants and shrubs. She is sending a form online where we can define our flower bed, etc. As of now we are uncertain if the sod will be down before we move in. Would be really nice to have that for Lucky! They come and do many new houses at once, so we will wait and see! Then we are responsible to keep the sod watered regularly until it takes root.

The builder keeps surprising us with updates. Seems like at this point the closing will be May 5? Bring me a sugar-free Margarita! Naw, just give me the keys 🙂 The only thing that would hold that up is if we have many days of rainfall. If that happens then the “mud” on the drywall can’t dry thoroughly for the sanding and painting, etc.

Exciting none the less!