Sitting in my prayer chair, waking up the morning of May 31st, I heard this:

Even to your old age and gray hairs
    I am he, I am he who will sustain you.
I have made you and I will carry you;
    I will sustain you and I will rescue you. Isaiah 46:4 NIV

The Message of the same verse reads:

“Listen to me, family of Jacob,
    everyone that’s left of the family of Israel.
I’ve been carrying you on my back
    from the day you were born,
And I’ll keep on carrying you when you’re old.
    I’ll be there, bearing you when you’re old and gray.
I’ve done it and will keep on doing it,
    carrying you on my back, saving you.”

Brings to mind the image of refugees or flood victims fleeing and carrying old people on their backs. Proud Americans do not like to think this image is about them, yet we all need God to carry us, regardless of age.

Listening to Lectio 360 the same day they related a story about a man whose wife battled chronic illness for 20 years. People WANT someone to blame. Many years ago when I sought prayer for strength and courage to cope with my chronic illness a “charismatic” preacher said to me, “I thought you knew better than that,” as if I should never be ill. Shame is not helpful in those situations! God TOLD me He would be with me in the fibromyalgia.

Should I push God aside and shout, “but You have to heal me! You promised if I did such and so I would be healed.” We tend to see others who have physical afflictions as if they are less than ourselves, as if they are responsible for the failing of their body. What a crock of hooey! Those of us who suffer need the courage of the Lion of Judah, the strength of the Risen Christ to help in times of need.

 Let us therefore approach the throne of grace with boldness, so that we may receive mercy and find grace to help in time of need. Hebrews 4:16 NRSV

Even Bob was struck in Lectio by the story of the woman with chronic illness. He wanted to be certain I listened on that day, and I had. The story is like what I was told … there is unresolved anger in your past, that is why you are ill. Let us just pray over you …sleep on a bed of magnets to be healed …drink this particular juice made from an exotic fruit … its all in your head. (Yep! those are actual things I was told!)

And to the remark about it all being in my head I replied, “Yes, in my head, my elbows, shoulders, hips. You name it I hurt there or I did last week or will next week.”

Fibro caused me to live in a high state of denial. That same logic does not work with diabetes. I AM angry at having diabetes, but I understand some of the disease in under my control, though there are many factors that are not. The Continuous Glucose Monitor no longer lets me live in that state of denial regarding diabetes. I must confess I am shocked at the effect certain foods have upon me. I must limit or eliminate those from my consumption.

In my nick knack collection I have a tiny brass chair that used to be in the windowsill. It reminds me that Christ is in our midst, ‘the unseen guest at every meal’. In the photo below it fell forward in the glass fronted case. At first I wondered how long it had been like that? Then I wondered if I could right it without dropping it behind the bookcase that rests below the display? Then I rejoiced that AGAIN the Lord has gotten my attention. I set a place for Him at the table of my life.

Lord God, Ruler of the Universe, give me eyes to see and ears to hear that I might proclaim Your glory.